What the HELL Were You Thinking?

Show Notes Episode 189: “Now You’re Messing With A Son of a Bitch”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe exploits his grief to elicit compassion and understanding, also to cadge as many free drinks as a possible. On the show this week we find a way to make George HW Bush’s death even MORE polarizing and controversial. (It’s a gift we possess.)

Along the way we learn about Dave’s childhood pets, some of whom were actually real and NOT imaginary Klingon Targs. Then we jump to the Twitter outrage over the Slatest Slate Article Slated in the history of Slate. From there we proceed to insult almost everyone we can imagine by disassembling the entire Cult of Dog in contemporary society. (Step 1: Your dog does not NEED an Instagram, assholes!) We look at Comparative Thanatology (Yes, this is a REAL thing!) and how death impacts everything from humans to Whelks. (Invertebrates, not 60’s Polka King) Finally, we just flat out attack people for loving their animals, because we are terrible human beings.

Our Sponsor this week is Dog, who want to know: “Are you going to eat that?” We open the show with Carlin’s secret of life and close with 16 Tonn explaining why we don’t care if you ratio our asses.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4xxYCREFbA

Citations Needed:

This is the Uber Slate Article

https://slate.com/human-interest/2018/12/sully-hw-bush-service-dog-george-hw-bush-funeral.html

I Don’t Feel So Good Mister Stark

https://www.cell.com/current-biology/pdf/S0960-9822(15)01371-8.pdf

Get OVER Yourself Fox

https://www.foxnews.com/opinion/george-h-w-bushs-service-dog-sully-isnt-a-democrat-or-republican-its-doggone-crazy-to-attack-him

Until My Watch Is Done

https://taskandpurpose.com/military-dog-maiko-ranger-firefight-afghanistan/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 188: “You Give Love A Bad Name”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe reveals he too was once called to mission, but missed the call because who the fuck answers an unknown number these days? On the show this week look at the strange tale of the American missionary who got his dumb ass killed trying to prosthelytize a tribe had no wish to hear the Good Word. (We guess they don’t answer unknown callers either!)

Along the way we discuss the wherefores of why some people are called to witness and how to spot them before they speak to you. (Hint: White shirts and name tags!) We debate the good and bad of missionaries. (Good: medical care, Bad: diseases requiring medical care.) We examine the phenomena of the subway preacher and their peculiar beliefs. There is also a new, more accurate version of the Last Supper that explains missionaries completely! (The A-B-C’s of the faith if you will.)

Our sponsor this week is Missionary Positions, testing your faith by putting you in harms way. We open with old friend George Carlin and close with Atreyu who have some names arrows of their own.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Szjv8DjD1rE

Citations Needed:

Putting Out the Unwelcome Mat

https://www.survivalinternational.org/tribes/sentinelese

He Sound Rational

https://www.tennessean.com/story/news/2018/11/23/john-allen-chau-christian-killed-tribe-sentinel-island/2091142002/

We Read It For the Articles

https://www.playboy.com/read/on-the-death-of-john-chau-and-the-madness-of-missionaries

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 187: “A Yam for Katta”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe eschews his usual anger and bitterness and tells a heartwarming tale of true togetherness and gratitude on Thanksgiving. There is also talk of copious amounts of alcohol because he is broken and desperate person. (Get HELP!)

Along the way we learn of a few of Dave’s Thanksgiving disasters, such as the seafood feast and the time he ate Gaejang-guk. (The less you know about either of these the better.) We learn why Southerners make so much damn food every time they cook. (Turns out they are very GOOD at math!) and finally we meet Katta and man who may not be aware of too many things, but he knows he likes yams. (If you know what we mean.)

Our Sponsor this week is Box-O-Bird, convenient square shaped turkey like product. We open the show with a dysfunctional family doing the best they can and close with Youtuber Louise D’Arcy singing something that sounds close to yams.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubyufRLoxyg

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 186: “Operation Circle Jerk”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe recalls exactly where he went wrong in life, and it begins where you might expect, on a shitter truck. On the show this week we examine another kind of waste with the troops on the US-Mexico border. (We are going to need a bigger truck)

Along the way we look at some other times Presidents have used the military to score cheap political points. (Operation Obfuscate Lewinsky was a travesty!) Then we learn to speak Military as Dave translates the complex jargon of service members into civilian. (You start by straining out the curse words.) We also learn that once upon a time, someone was willing to introduce Dave to her family. (Consider it a dodged bullet mystery woman!) Finally, we dig in to the moment of clarity that comes to all who bravely served in the Armed Forces and the finally Embrace the Suck.

Our Sponsor this week is Carl’s Concertina Emporium, if fencin’ is your mission, call Carl’s. We open the show with Operation Market Garden and close with George Possley trying to find his jewelry.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music:https://youtu.be/FcMiVK4m3_U

Citations Needed:

Embracing the Suck in Texas

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/10/us/deployed-inside-the-united-states-the-military-waits-for-the-migrant-caravan.html

It’s Shitty Job But Someone’s Gotta Do It Jeff

https://www.usnews.com/news/national-news/articles/2018-11-13/general-military-deployment-to-border-serves-as-deterrent-to-caravan

It Really IS a Stunt, General Mattis

https://www.cnbc.com/2018/11/13/mattis-heads-to-us-

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 185: “If You Try Sometimes, You Get What You Need”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe mixes up a Blue Wave at the bar, which is a drink containing some kind of blue mouthwash and vodka from a plastic jug. (It taste worse than it sounds) On the show this week, we analyze last week’s election only to discover things are better than you think they are. (Unlike Dave’s Blue Wave)

Along the way we talk briefly about Jeff Sessions being fired. (YAY!) and what happens to the Mueller investigation. (Boo!) and what we can do about it now that we won the House. (Yay!) Then we talk about Liberal disappointment and why Liberal can never be happy with the things they have. (They are a lot like Billy Idol, the more, more more!) We check out the big wins we did win and the big wins we didn’t win but were still a victory. (Our logic is solid, we promise.) Finally, we talk about what comes next. (We enjoy a nice glass of eggnog!)

Our Sponsor this week is Uri’s Unicorns, delivering the fantasy when reality just won’t. We open the show with some Brony Porn and close with Lone Bellow in an entirely predictable but apropos closing song.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQ2BJVpKXAY&feature=youtu.be

Citations Needed:

Buck Up, Little Campers

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/11/why-democrats-lost-key-2018-midterm-races.html

This Can’t Be Good

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2018/11/bob-mueller-jeff-sessions-firing-matthew-whitaker/575248/

Taking It to the Streets

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/11/09/no-one-is-above-law-protesters-across-us-say-trump-threatens-muellers-investigation-by-replacing-sessions/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.82d0fe7b1057

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 184: “One More Last Chance”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe has one simple message:

VOTE

Unless you are a Republican, in which case kindly disregard this message.

Come back next week for analysis, insight and poop references. BUT ONLY IF YOU VOTED. If you didn’t, please, go fuck yourself!

Our Sponsor this week is Beto. Beto is beautiful, Beto is Kind, Beto healed my bones spurs. We open the show with an inspiring movie monologue and close with Lyal Strickland explaining how many chances we have left to change the country.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 183: The Greatest Trick the Devil Ever Pulled (Spooktacular Part 2)

This week Host Dave Bledsoe heads back to his old stomping grounds in Arkansas after 30 years only find he is STILL not welcome a Ray’s Ray’s Taphouse in Blytheville after what he did. On the show this week, we finish up Part Two of the Halloween Spooktacular by looking at the low point of the Satanic Panic. (Besides Dave being forced to sell his Dungeon Master’s Guide.)

Along the way we discover why Dave never became a Goth Kid (Turns out even Goth Kids won’t hang with SOME people.) and why Goth Kids are so ostracized from teenage society. (Jealousy, because black is a VERY flattering fabric color.) We give you the thumbnail view of the Robin Hood Hills Murders and the subsequent farce of a trial, then settle in for a protracted conversation on the evils of For Profit Universities and their impact on the education system. (Don’t worry it will all make sense in the end, as much anything ever does on this dumb show.) Finally we explain who is REALLY behind the constant state of moral panic in the United States and we think the answers will surprise you...if you have only just arrived in the United States from a distant planet, or possibly from Hell. (Even The Devil thinks these people are assholes.)

Our Sponsor this week is Satan-O-Way Demon Hunters, the Devil in our Details! We open the show with an ex-satanist and close with the Louvin Brothers who has some news for us!

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Episode 182: After the Bombs Subside

This week Host Dave Bledsoe is PISSED because he worked on a damn script all week and had to rewrite an entire show on Friday! Again! On the show this week, we chuck the show we had in the trash (Honestly the best thing for it) and talk about the MAGA Bomber. We didn’t WANT to, but now we HAVE to!

Along the way we dig into latest conspiracy theory spun out of the fevered imaginations of the MAGAnoscenti to attempt to delude the easily deluded into believing George Soros bombed himself. (Our brain hurts) We explain everything we KNOW about the bombings this week instead of what we we THINK we know. (Once that is done, THEN we begin to opine.) We look at the history of domestic terrorism in the United States only discover you can’t believe everything you hear on Fox and Friends. (Really, ANYTHING you hear on Fox and Friends.) Then we take a quick look at who it to blame for the radizalization of the MAGA Bomber and get to meet the Anti-Dave, just as a drunk and arrogant, only THIS Dave, is a Republican!

Our Sponsor this week is Bob’s Bomb Disposal, we get the BOOM out of your room. We open with Murtaugh and Riggs and close with SPRBand who tells us what happens now.

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music: https://youtu.be/6LxkaE7pxhM

Citations Needed

Meet the MAGA Bomber

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/10/26/suspected-explosive-devices-addressed-cory-booker-james-clapper-probe-expands-packages/?utm_term=.56144663a6ec

Not THIS Shit Again

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/business/false-flag-theory-bombs-conservative-media.html

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Show Notes Episode 181: To Hell With the Devil (Spooktacular Part 1)

This week Host Dave Bledsoe puts on his Iron Maiden t-shirt, straps his spikes on his wrists and prepares to headbang like like a MoFo, only to hurt his back when he tried. (He is SO OLD!) On the show this week it is part one our annual Halloween Spooktacular!

Join us as we open the vaults of time and draw forth ancient tomes of forbidden knowledge, dredge secrets long forgotten and bring them to light!

In this first half we explore the demon haunted wastelands of small town America circa 1980 when bands of dark cloaked figures flitted around graveyards and preschool playgrounds seeking to snatch helpless children for their Black Masses and perverse rituals! (Note: This was not happening.) When Satan stretched forth his ravening claws and sank them deep into the virgin flesh of a generation through Heavy Metal “music” and games containing Hobbits and Ents! (Again, this never happened!) Yes, we go back to the origins of the Satanic Panic, from its humble beginnings when a crock therapist concocted a tale of Satanic Ritual Abuse with his client to sell books, to a paranoid schizophrenic alcoholic mother who thought diaper rash meant someone was sexually abusing her child ruining the lives of innocent people! Then we explore the REAL cause of the Panic! (Hint: Oprah,Phil Donahue,Geraldo Rivera) Join us we give our blood and souls to the dark lord media for Spooktacular 2018 Part One: TO HELL WITH THE DEVIL!

Our Sponsor this week is The Arcane Emporium, affordable, discrete and complete for all your Black Sabbath needs! We open our show with Geraldo telling you how spot if you kid has become a Satanist and close with James Lee doing the worst song ever TOTALLY badass!

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

The Show is on Spotify!

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Show Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2WAX4ia4Bc

Citations Which Must Not Be Named:

Michelle Gets PAID

https://people.com/archive/a-canadian-womans-bizarre-childhood-memories-of-satan-shock-shrinks-and-priests-vol-14-no-9/

PERVERSION!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oak_Hill_satanic_ritual_abuse_trial#Overview

The Long Arm of the Law

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/ct-xpm-1987-10-08-8703160120-story.html

Complete Reading and Research:

https://www.vox.com/2016/10/30/13413864/satanic-panic-ritual-abuse-history-explained

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/yvez3j/is-satan-still-a-big-deal-in-2016

https://psmag.com/social-justice/make-a-cross-with-your-fingers-its-the-satanic-panic

https://www.signature-reads.com/2017/12/the-exorcist-still-haunts-us/

https://techgnosis.com/the-counterculture-and-the-occult/

https://historynewsnetwork.org/article/161739

https://flashbak.com/10-regrettable-examples-of-1970s-occult-lameness-7243/

http://time.com/3973573/satanism-american-history/

https://people.com/archive/a-canadian-womans-bizarre-childhood-memories-of-satan-shock-shrinks-and-priests-vol-14-no-9/

http://michellebredeson.com/blog/2015/5/11/a-literal-witch-hunt

https://psmag.com/social-justice/make-a-cross-with-your-fingers-its-the-satanic-panic

https://wideshut.co.uk/satanic-ritual-abuse-mythology/

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/ct-xpm-1987-10-08-8703160120-story.html

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Episode 180: “It’s the End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe feels better than he has in years when he realizes he no longer has to quit smoking or drinking because we are all going to die! On the show this week we regretfully inform you that we are all going to die. (In a couple of decades, plan ahead!)

That’s right we tackle the big UN Climate Change Report informing us we have twelve years to get our shit straight and explain the chances of that happening. (Is there a number smaller than zero?) Along the way we examine the history of climate change science all the way back to Stone Age when the first caveman waved his hand to indicate he was offended by the smoke from the mastodon cook fire! (A real dick move!) We jump forward to 1896 when someone first asked if MAYBE burning all this coal was the best idea. (Hint: It was not.) Then we dive into the warning signs of our current crisis. (We probably shouldn’t have trusted the oil companies when they said CO2 was GOOD for the climate.) Finally we examine how The End will play out in excruciating detail, right down to your grandchildren eating you just to stay alive! (You will be delicious with Siracha!) Lastly, we answer the question “Is there ANYTHING we can do?!” (Absolutely, it is just that we won’t do it!)

Our Sponsor this week is Arnold’s Apocalypse Palace, everything you need to delay the inevitable. We open the show with our Spirit Guide George Carlin and close with YouTuber Kyra Moore with the song we will all have a repeat the next few decades!

Show Music: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

The Show on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/whatthehellpodcast/

The Show on Soundcloud https://soundcloud.com/david-bledsoe-4

The Show on Spotify

www.whatthehellpodcast.com

Give us your money on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/Whatthehellpodcast

The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Citations Needed

It’s Getting Hot In Here, So Take Off All Your Clothes

https://www.nap.edu/read/12181/chapter/1#ix

It’s Probably Nothing

https://www.smokeandfumes.org/documents/7

Sure We Can Trust EXXON!?!

https://insideclimatenews.org/news/15092015/Exxons-own-research-confirmed-fossil-fuels-role-in-global-warming

Making Logic Out of Insanity

https://journals.openedition.org/ejas/10305#tocto1n2

Put It On Our Tab

https://oilprice.com/The-Environment/Global-Warming/How-Much-Would-Zero-Emissions-Cost.html

I Am Sure It Will Be Fine

https://earther.gizmodo.com/geoengineering-is-inevitable-1829623031

Other Reading

https://www.vox.com/2018/10/9/17951924/climate-change-global-warming-un-ipcc-report-takeaways

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_climate_change_science#Scientists_increasingly_predict_warming,_1970s

https://earther.gizmodo.com/anti-wind-farm-activism-is-sweeping-europe-and-the-us-c-1829627812

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices