What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting

Jen Lilley and Dr. John DeGarmo | Called to Foster — The Honest Guide to Foster Care and Adoption

Foster care. Adoption. The calling that changes everything.

If you have ever felt that quiet pull on your heart — that nudge that says maybe we are supposed to do something — this episode is for you.

In this episode of the What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting Podcast, Christine Marie sits down with actress and foster care advocate Jen Lilley and international foster care expert Dr. John DeGarmo to talk about their brand new book Called to Foster — the honest, hope-filled guide to every stage of the foster care and adoption journey.

Jen Lilley, known from Days of Our Lives, Hallmark films, and dozens of beloved family movies — has fostered and adopted children through the Los Angeles County system and has become one of the most recognized voices for foster care in America. Dr. John DeGarmo is the founder of The Foster Care Institute, a TEDx Talk presenter, international consultant, and foster and adoptive parent to over 65 children. Together they wrote the book that every foster parent, adoptive parent, and anyone considering foster care needs in their hands.

Dr. John did not want to be a foster parent. He believed every myth. Until a child sex trafficking ring victimized many of his own students and he could not look away. Jen never planned to become a foster care advocate. Until she opened her home and her heart through the LA County system and could not stop.

This episode is raw. It is emotional. It is deeply faith-filled. And it will challenge every person listening to examine what they are doing or not doing for the children who are waiting.

Because this is a kingdom priority. And if you are listening you are part of the mission field.

In this episode you will hear:

What led Jen Lilley and Dr. John DeGarmo to foster care and why neither of them planned it

The hardest truths about foster care that most families are not prepared for

How to love a child fully knowing they may leave

What the church is getting wrong about foster care and the cost of its silence

The faith moments that sustained them when they wanted to quit

Why Called to Foster is the guide every foster and adoptive family needs

How to get the book into the hands of caseworkers and child welfare professionals who need it

Get the Book Called to Foster:

https://a.co/d/03razpJS

Connect with Dr. John DeGarmo:

Website: https://www.drjohndegarmofostercare.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/john.degarmo.7

Connect with Jen Lilley:

Website: https://www.jenlilley.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jen_lilley

Connect with Christine:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cortisol_coach

If this episode blessed you:

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Welcome to the What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting podcast! I’m Christine Marie, adoptive mom, former foster parent, and biblical mindset coach. Whether you’re considering foster care, navigating adoption, supporting birth families, or trying to hold it all together in the middle of the unknown, you’re in the right place.

In today’s episode, I sit down with Jeremy Walden, foster and adoptive dad, college professor, ministry leader, and co author of The Heart Work of Foster Care. Jeremy shares his family’s powerful journey through foster care and adoption, including adopting one child and later welcoming her siblings, building relationships with biological parents, and witnessing restoration, reunification, and healing unfold over years of faithful obedience.

This is one of those conversations that reminds you foster care isn’t a moment. It’s a long road of love, patience, boundaries, and trust in God.

Jeremy opens up about:

• The real challenges of foster parenting and adoption

Jeremy and his wife have adopted three children from foster care and have cared for many more over the past decade. With over 25 years of ministry experience and 15 years as a college professor, Jeremy brings both practical wisdom and deep faith to this conversation.

He also shares about their book, The Heart Work of Foster Care: A Hopeful and Honest Guide to Foster Parenting, a Christ centered resource filled with real stories, encouragement, and practical insight for anyone walking the foster care journey.

Jeremy is currently conducting an anonymous survey to better understand how fostering impacts foster parents’ marriages. If you’d like to participate, you can find it here:

You can also find Jeremy and Jara’s book here:

Whether you’re new to foster care, deep into adoption, or simply want to understand how faith sustains families through trauma and uncertainty, this episode will encourage you, challenge you, and remind you that God is always working, even in the waiting.

☕ Grab your coffee and settle in — this one will stretch you, strengthen you, and remind you why love is always worth it.

💕 PS Want to join a supportive space for women who are navigating foster care, adoption, or just want to love others well? Come join us here:

Welcome to Season Two of the What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting podcast!

I’m Christine Marie — adoptive mom, former foster parent, and biblical mindset coach. Whether you're navigating foster care, adoption, or parenting a child with trauma or mental health challenges — you’re in the right place.

In this season premiere, I’m joined by Donna Kirkwood — former special education teacher, adoptive mom, author, and woman of deep faith — as she shares her family’s journey of saying “yes” to adopting a child with high needs.

From the early days of behavioral challenges and medication decisions to the later diagnosis of schizoaffective bipolar disorder, Donna walks us through how faith, structure, and community helped them navigate trauma-informed parenting and deep unknowns.

We talk about:

Adopting a child with high needs and complex diagnoses

Parenting through mental health challenges with grace and structure

Medications and behavioral support through a trauma-informed lens

Why boundaries, faith, and consistency matter

Donna’s book, He Is the Vine, as a source of spiritual encouragement during hard seasons

Whether you're parenting a child with trauma, navigating mental health in adoption, or walking through uncertainty with God — this episode will speak to your heart.

☕ Grab your coffee and settle in — this one will stretch you, strengthen you, and remind you why love is always worth it.

💕 PS — Want to join a supportive space for women who are navigating foster care, adoption, or just want to love others well? Come join us here:

Connect with Donna Kirkwood:

Welcome to the What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting podcast. I’m Christine Marie — adoptive mom, former foster parent, and biblical mindset coach. Whether you’re in the early stages of foster care, navigating adoption, or standing in a season of unknowns — this space was created for you.

Today’s episode is different.

It’s not polished or perfectly planned — it’s real. It’s raw. It’s what I’m walking through right now.

Last night, my daughter chose to leave.

Not because I stopped loving her — but because love doesn’t force.

This episode is a reflection on what it means to surrender your child to God when nothing makes sense. It’s for the mama who’s exhausted. The one who’s grieving. The one who has done everything “right” and still feels like it’s falling apart.

If you’ve ever had to release control, grieve what could have been, or trust God with the child you love — I pray this message meets you in that sacred space.

☕ Grab your coffee and settle in — this one will stretch you, strengthen you, and remind you why love is always worth it.

XO-Christine

💕 PS — Want to join a supportive space for women who are navigating foster care, adoption, or just want to love others well? Come join us here:

This week’s episode is one I hope every adoptive and foster parent listens to - and listens with an open heart.

I’m honored to sit down with Sydney Curtin - birth mom, author of Courageous Considerations, speaker, life coach, and founder of Curtin Call - as she shares the raw and painful truth about her adoption story, and why she’s now advocating for ethical reform across the entire industry.

In 2019, Sydney made what she believed was the most loving and selfless decision a mother could make - placing her daughter for adoption. What followed was a heartbreaking unraveling of promises made to her and her child. From being coerced into signing away her rights to experiencing the gut-wrenching reality of an unenforceable open adoption, Sydney’s story exposes what many don’t realize about the current adoption system.

Together, we talk about:

Sydney’s book, Courageous Considerations, is a powerful tool designed to help both adoptive and natural families ask the hard questions before, during, and after placement. Because adoption, when done right, is not the severing of one family - it’s the joining of two.

Whether you’ve adopted, are considering adoption, or want to better understand the full picture of what ethical, relational adoption can look like - this conversation will challenge you, stretch you, and invite you into something deeper.

☕ Grab your coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in.

💕 PS — Want to join a supportive space for women who are navigating foster care, adoption, or just want to love others well?

Come join us here:

Connect with Sydney Curtin:

If the college admissions process feels overwhelming… you’re not alone.

And if you’re a foster or adoptive parent? There are even more layers to navigate.

This week on What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting, I had the absolute honor of sitting down with Cynthia Nash, a college admissions and financial aid coach with over 20 years of experience at top-tier universities like Northwestern and Vanderbilt- and friend, this conversation is packed with gold.

Cynthia has helped students earn millions in scholarships and grants, including:

Whether you’re parenting a child from foster care, adoption, or not—you’ll walk away from this episode equipped with tools and insight to help your teen step into a future they didn’t think was possible.

In this episode, we talk about:

Whether your child is in 9th grade or nearing graduation- this episode will give you real steps, renewed hope, and a fresh vision for what’s possible.

Now, grab your cup of coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in!

XO,

💕 Join Our Community!

Join us here:

https://www.youtube.com/@fosteringandadopting

Get Cynthia’s Free College Admissions Guide:

Contact Cynthia Nash

Learn About Her Coaching Programs:

This week on What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting, I had the absolute honor of sitting down with April Ficklin, a TBRI® Practitioner, adoptive mom, and the Director of Family Support Services for Flourishing Families of South Carolina.

April brings both professional wisdom and personal experience to this conversation. Her work is centered on helping adoptive families find real connection, healing, and hope through Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) and her heart for trauma-informed care is nothing short of powerful.

In this episode, we talk about:

Whether you’re new to adoption or knee-deep in the hard parts, this conversation will remind you that healing is possible and you don’t have to do this alone.

☕ Now, grab your cup of coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in!

XO,

💕 Join Our Community!

https://www.youtube.com/@fosteringandadopting

Connect with April Ficklin:

In this episode of What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting, I’m sitting down with my friend Rebecca Del Pozo- an adoptee, an adoptive mom, and a fierce advocate for families who’ve walked this road from every angle.

This conversation is honest, vulnerable, and deeply encouraging.

Rebecca doesn’t just talk about adoption- she’s lived it in every form. From the unexpected twists and tender moments to the hard decisions and holy perspective shifts, she shares how the Lord has used adoption to shape her family, her faith, and her purpose.

If you’ve ever wrestled with the "why" behind your story, or wondered if you’re the right person for the calling in front of you, Rebecca’s story will meet you right where you are- and lift your eyes higher.

☕ Now, grab your cup of coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in!

XO,

💕 Join Our Community!

🎙️ More from Rebecca:

Welcome back to the What to Expect While Fostering and Adopting podcast! I’m Christine Marie — adoptive mom, former foster parent, and biblical mindset coach — and today’s guest is someone whose voice and impact in the foster care space cannot be overstated.

I’m honored to sit down with Dr. John DeGarmo, founder and director of The Foster Care Institute, international speaker, best-selling author of 10 books, and foster/adoptive dad to over 60 children. Dr. DeGarmo has worked alongside child welfare agencies across the globe and is a leading voice for system change and trauma-informed parenting.

In this conversation, we dive into the realities of foster care that few are willing to talk about — from the mental health crisis and over-medication of foster youth to the growing burnout among caregivers. We also talk about practical tools and mindsets that can help foster and adoptive parents stay grounded, effective, and full of hope even in the hardest seasons.

Whether you’re currently fostering, considering it, or simply want to better support foster families in your community, this episode is packed with insight, encouragement, and truth.

☕ So grab your coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in.

XO, Christine Marie

🎧 In this episode, we cover:

The over-medication crisis in foster care

How trauma shows up in children and how to respond with connection

The importance of mental health support for foster families

What foster parents need most (and why many are walking away)

Dr. DeGarmo’s personal journey and why he still believes in the system, despite its flaws

About Dr. John DeGarmo:

International keynote speaker and trainer

Connect with Dr. DeGarmo:

💕 Join Our Free Community of Christian Foster & Adoptive Moms:

This one is for the foster and adoptive parents carrying the weight no one sees—who keep showing up, even when it feels like everything is falling apart.

Today, I’m sitting down with Devin Schubert—an adoptive dad of three—for a conversation about the cost of obedience, the depth of trauma, and the God who restores what we thought was lost forever.

After adopting his son, Devin walked through five years of chaos:

When his wife left, Devin stepped into solo fatherhood, determined to fight for his son—alone.

Flat on his back, ready to give up, Jesus walked in and said:

And now—four years later—his son is being reunited with him and moving back home in just 4 months.

This episode is a story of resilience, radical love, and full-circle redemption for every parent who’s ever wondered, “Is it worth it?”

Tune in now and be reminded:

☕ Grab your coffee, get comfy, and let’s dig in.

📌 Connect with Devin:

🎥 Watch on YouTube: youtube.com/@fosteringandadopting