Most people think the goal with mismatched libidos is making the lower-desire partner want more of the sex you've been having—or making the higher-desire partner want less. But that's not it. 

And it wouldn't work anyway. 

I walk through the actual goals when you're healing a desire gap. They boil down to maximizing sexual compatibility, emotional connection, and quality of communication, then deciding how to manage whatever gap, if any, is left over. This means focusing first on better quality sex, real emotional connection, and removing what's blocking desire. Then making clean decisions together. Plus, we'll talk about why magic bullets or quick fixes don't work, and what does. 

Thriving Together, Couples Healing Attachment Patterns Through Touch

A Groundbreaking 6-Week Live Online Workshop
with Dr. Aline LaPierre & Dr. Laura Jurgens starts February 1, 2026

https://neuroaffectivetouch.com/thriving-together

Get my free guide: 5 Steps to Start Solving Desire Differences
(Without Blame or Shame), A Practical Starting Point for Individuals and Couples, at https://laurajurgens.com/libido

Find out more about me at https://laurajurgens.com/