Whatever with Heather - Mindset, Parenting & Personal Growth

Learning to Love Yourself Before You ‘Arrive’

Do you ever achieve a goal and still feel like… something’s missing? Like no matter what you accomplish, you can’t seem to love yourself fully? In this episode, I dive deep into why self-hate and chasing achievements from a place of self-disappointment never get us to self-love—and what actually does.

I share the shift that changed everything for me: learning to propel yourself forward with self-love instead of self-hate, seeing your current self as enough, and using that energy to reach the goals, dreams, and future versions of yourself that you deserve.

This episode is for anyone who’s tired of clawing, proving, or striving to be “worthy” and is ready to explore what it really looks like to motivate yourself from a place of love, belief, and enoughness.

Tune in to discover:

•  Why achieving goals doesn’t automatically create self-love 
•  The trap of using self-hate as motivation 
•  How to see your current self as the vehicle to your future self 
•  The simple (but life-changing) practice of moving forward with self-love 

It’s time to stop waiting to arrive and start loving yourself right now.

Have you ever caught yourself waiting for “someday”? Someday when things are perfect, someday when you finally feel ready, someday when life slows down? I’ve been there too, and in this episode I’m sharing the one simple shift that helps me turn “someday” into today.

Let's talk about:

• Why action (not thought) is what actually transforms us
• How stepping into our roles—whether CEO, mom, partner, or friend—makes alignment easier
• The trap of perfectionism and how it quietly keeps us stuck
• Small, doable actions that make us proud right away
• The real shift that creates momentum and turns intentions into action

Go check out the 3 Habits of Empowered Living program—that’s just $33 and designed to help you step into the life you’re proud of without waiting for “someday. www.the-empowered-life.com/3habitsofempoweredliving

Seventeen years into motherhood, I’ve learned some lessons that completely changed the way I parent. Some of these I figured out early, others much later—but every single one shaped our family for the better.

In this episode, I share the 7 biggest lessons I’d tell my younger self about motherhood, including:

• Why it’s okay (and necessary) to do things you love.
• How giving yourself breaks—without guilt—makes you a better mom.
• Why your imperfections are actually a gift to your kids.
• The importance of raising adults, not just kids.
• And how teamwork and chores can transform family life.

If you’ve ever felt guilty for needing space, worried about not doing it “perfectly,” or wondered how to prepare your kids for real life—this episode is for you.

✨ Give yourself grace. Your kids don’t need a perfect mom. They need you.

In this episode we explore how to navigate life's unknowns and stay mentally healthy through simple daily practices that build resilience.

• New podcast format includes full episodes and shorter "pep talk" episodes
• The "Daily Five" practices that help manage anxiety and depression: stillness, movement, breath, intention, and growth
• Importance of "parenting yourself" by making yourself do what you know is beneficial for mental health
• How trying to control the uncontrollable creates unnecessary anxiety and ruins our own day
• We can control our actions but not outcomes or most external circumstances
• Anxiety often comes from the false belief we can control the future through worry
• Learning to surrender to life's unknowns brings more peace than fighting them

This week's challenge: commit to practicing your version of the Daily Five and recognize where you're trying to control things you can't.

🎙️ Episode 37: Life Update + The Podcast is Back!

Hey y’all — I’m back! It’s been over a year since I last dropped an episode of Whatever with Heather, and honestly, I didn’t know I was going to press pause when I did. In this episode, I catch you up on everything that’s happened since May 2024: the highs, the hard stuff, and all the moments in between that helped me get clear on what I truly value.

This isn’t just a life update — it’s about navigating change, facing burnout, choosing alignment, and stepping back into what feels right for me and my family.

✨ In This Episode, I Talk About:

• Why the podcast went silent for 13 months
• What it was like teaching in public school for the first time
• What led to full-blown burnout and my decision not to renew my teaching contract
• How my husband and I started rebuilding our Taekwondo business
• The values that surfaced through all of this: integrity, alignment, peace, and freedom
• What we’re building now — and why it feels so right

💭 What I’ve Learned:

• I’m not meant to work in environments that drain me, even if I can handle them
• Integrity isn’t just important — it’s a non-negotiable
• I need work that feels aligned, creative, and rooted in purpose
• Stepping into the unknown is scary... but also where the magic happens

🛠️ Looking Ahead:

Now that I’ve got more space and clarity, the podcast is back! Here’s what to expect going forward:

• New episodes on mindset, parenting, marriage, and life’s messy ups and downs
• Honest reflections on what I learned through teaching and burnout
• Guest conversations and chats with my husband (we have thoughts)
• Updates as we build our new business — and continue this wild adventure
• Oh, and… I’m finally finishing my book! 🎉

💬 A Little Note from Me:

If you’ve been listening from the beginning — thank you. And if you’re new here, welcome. I hope this episode helps you feel less alone in whatever season you’re walking through. I’m so grateful to be back, to be sharing again, and to have you along for the ride.

In this episode I share the concept I created this year of 'creative discipline.'

Download My Free Habit Tracker: "Focused 50/Focused 14"

I describe my process of choosing this year's 'word of the year' and how it turned into putting 2 words together. Life is a dance of sorts, one where every step counts, bringing us closer to a life that's as disciplined as it is delightfully unpredictable.

Let's talk about turning the tedious into the terrific. This episode is about connecting the dots between our drives and our dreams, and finding that sweet spot where discipline fuels our creativity, not stifles it.

In this episode we talk about the role that failure plays in personal growth and success. 

We'll also talk about re-framing our journeys in a way that helps us move forward with the ability to navigate obstacles and failures.

0:00
0:36 Why we fear/avoid failure...
1:29 Academic "failing" and life
2:39 Failing is part of the journey
3:18 Low/No Obstacles
3:45 Obstacles & failure with hard things
4:33 Climbing Everest
5:31 Failure/Obstacles are a feature
6:31 Making the journey less scary
6:40 Fear of the upward climb
6:55 #1 Fear of being "above" others
7:20 #2 Failure is dangerous
7:54 Forward vs. upward
9:37 Life as a forward journey
9:43 Not a climb
10:10 Crash and burn
10:37 Navigation, re-routing, re-evaluating
11:05 No more leveling up
11:30 "Going on a Bear Hunt"
11:54 Navigate the obstacles
12:35 Thank you!

In this episode I share the 4 tools that were pivotal (and continue to be pivotal) in navigating the hard times of life.

2 mindset shifts and 2 actionable tools to help you move forward in your life.

0:00
0:10 Intro
2:14 Figuring it Out
2:45 The 4 Tools
3:03 #1  Re-framing Happiness
6:40 #1 Recap
8:08 2nd Tool
8:41 The Words We Use
12:29 3rd Tool
12:43 #3 Create a Shift
14:56 Ask Yourself...
19:27 4th Tool
19:42 #4 Make it Tangible
24:37 4 Tools - Summary
29:54 You are Not Alone

In this episode, I share my journey with depression and anxiety and how my lowest brought me to where I am today. 

0:00
0:22 Introduction
1:17 The Lowest Low
1:58 Background
3:49 First Marriage
4:47 Single Mom Life
5:41 Current Marriage
6:24 Depression Full Force
7:07 "I just want to be happy."
7:37 Tipping Point
9:50 Couldn't Understand...
10:16 Turning Inward
10:38 Depression Staying
11:02 Search for Happiness
11:21 The 3 Options
12:42 Figuring it Out
13:26 Unknown Destination
13:41 Why is the Lowest Necessary?
14:26 Major Discomfort
15:13 Figuring it Out
15:43 To Heal
15:58 Water and Air
16:29 Undercurrent
17:59 Final Thoughts

Join me as I share this journey, and hopefully give to those who might see reflections of their own journey in mine.

Learn how to teach your children to navigate trust... how to build it, and why it's really hard when you break it.

Learn:

• How trust is different.
• What happens when trust is broken.
• How our love for our children is the same, but our trust may be different.
• How to teach trust to your children.
  • Trust levels are different for different things.
  • If they want trust, then they have to BUILD trust.
  • Trust is built by CONSISTENT actions that show you are trustworthy.
  • If you don’t build trust, or destroy trust in one area, you will have to work to re-build that trust. And it will be harder to re-build each time (like bricks for a house, the first time they come in a nice stack, but re-building if the house is knocked over is more work).
  • If one child builds trust... And one doesn’t. There will be different privileges given to different children. 
• Teaching Your Children: We don’t expect you to be perfect. But we do expect you to be honest. 
  • You will make mistakes. Own it (teaching ownership while young).
  • If you lie or are dishonest about something, remember that you are choosing to destroy trust. Trust that you will have to re-build.