What's the value?

"Stable mutual actualization" -- that is what my guest, Rocco, is after. He believes with the use of true reason (mature, sophisticated, objective reason) we as humans, have the ability to achieve a stable state, where mutually all of us, can self actualize into what we want to be. Contrast that with the world he sees today, where most people actualize at the expense of someone else. We mostly just follow our base instincts to try to live the best life we can imagine, without acknowledging the fact that our instincts and our imagination are fallible.

If that sounds heavy, I agree. This was a heavy conversation. But I wouldn't say it was abstract or theoretical. In a very logical and pragmatic way, he is trying to figure out how humanity can save itself from itself. As way of background, Rocco is an Australian philosopher, poet, and podcaster (https://eyeswideopenlife.org/). In his words, he has "an unorthodox and autodidactic mastery of human psychology which provides cutting and insightful observations."

If I had to put it simply, Rocco believes he sees things that others don't see. He believes he has a gift to understand humans and the things that plague us, the things that cause unnecessary suffering in the world. He also believes he has a heart that is committed to trying to make the world a better place and an ego that can submit itself to logic and reason (rather than his own personal comfort or happiness).

That all sounds amazing, but as they say "that is why they play the game"-- or that is why we do this show. It was truly thought provoking to probe and challenge Rocco's views to understand what they were made of. We explored a host of assumptions and implications, as well as tried to understand tactically what we can do to try to improve. How do we actually make the world a better place?

A big thanks to Rocco for being on and the work he is doing. Something tells me this won't be the last conversation we have about humanity and our path forward.

Aadil is a friend from Harvard Business School who I've always admired, but at the same time always wondered what made him tick. He's lived an interesting life, being born and raised in Mombasa, Kenya, and then spending most of his adult life studying and working in Europe, America, and Africa. He's been successful as an entrepreneur, a product developer, and maybe most notably as an angel investor focused mainly on emerging markets (with lots of investment back into Africa).

I admired Aadil because I remember in business school he seemed to have a very worldly and sophisticated view of life. It was almost as if he seemed to understand something that most others had not (or at least I hadn't). Life always seems so complex to me and at times almost impossible to figure out how if we are supposed to be good, successful, happy, humble, fulfilled, or whatever else? Aadil seemed to encompass all of these things in almost an effortless way. Those are the exact types of people I want to dig into and question to understand what is underneath it all. Does he really have it all figured out? How does he view life and his reason for being here?

Aadil started off the show talking about his work in angel investing and how in some ways, it started back when he was 6 years old riding in the car with his dad in Mombasa. He remembers a moment when a young, seemingly homeless, child came to their car window asking for help. He wasn't intellectually sophisticated enough to make sense of why this boy, who was the same age as him, was living on the street while he was riding in comfortable in a car; but he did feel a deep sense of unfairness.

Ultimately it led to his value of "leveling the playing field", trying to create products and invest in organizations that help prevent kids like that boy, who didn't choose to live on the street (just like Aadil didn't choose to live in a well off family), from being put in that unfair position. He takes a very pragmatic approach to life, almost like a life hacker (meant as a compliment), trying to bridge his skills, desires, and morals to make the most impact, while living the most enjoyable life he can. Then we did the fun philosophical work of questioning it all, trying to determine if this approach to life made Aadil a good person, a wise person, or a selfish person (or maybe all 3?).

Passion is one of my favorite topics to discuss. Logic is my religion because I understand the power of it, but passion is something that fascinates me on a much more visceral/primal level. I can't fully explain passion but I know how attracted to it I am. I know the feeling I get when I am engaged in something I am passionate about. Maybe my guest today, Jeremy, put it best when he said "passion is the fuel of human energy." By that I think he means it is the thing that allows us to do everything we do in life. For us to be motivated or driven to accomplish anything, we need to have passion in our lives.

As way of background, Jeremy is the founder of Universal Imagination, Inc, a multidimensional research and development organization focused on the passion industry. As part of that, he's invented a new utility designed to help people unlock the full potential of their passion. Before starting Universal Imagination, he worked as a technologist at SpaceX, where he assisted the CIO and helped to reignite the public's excitement for space travel (he also collaborated with Elon Musk on a music video celebrating the company's first successful launch).

At the core of Jeremy's work and view of the world, is this idea that we, as humans, have the opportunity to pursue "conscious evolution." Unlike in our past, where we were driven along by nature and the evolutionary process, he believes we have an opportunity now to "take the wheel" and direct the future evolution of our species. If we can tap into our true passion and do the thing that our soul actually wants to do (vs. what we have to do just to survive), it unlocks a whole new world of human potential and possibilities.

I'll be honest the idea of us "taking the wheel" intrigues and excites me, while at the same time completely terrifies me. As Jeremy and I asked on the show, do we think humans are capable of driving our own evolution? Have we shown throughout history that we have can use that type of power to make the world a better place? This was a truly fascinating and dense conversation about passion and humanity.

I've said this before, but there was a time before I started doing this show where I thought I understood the world. I thought I understood it at such a level that it was reasonable for me to judge or dismiss certain viewpoints as obviously wrong. Whether it be spiritual beliefs, different values, or an aspect of how the world worked that did not directly align with how I thought it worked. Ironically, I would not ask any questions or explicitly challenge the person (I was too much of a people pleaser), but would have just judged them in my head.

I don't know anything for sure, but the new approach I take to life definitely seems to be a lot better one. In this new approach, when I have a guest like Genie on who talks about building the skill to "talk" with animals, I am extremely open to the idea. Who am I to assume that is crazy or impossible or nonsensical? There is so much in this world we don't understand, how could I ever assume I know better? At the same time though, I am also much more comfortable to humbly question the idea to understand it better. I am not afraid to challenge and probe, because I know it is not coming from a place of judgement but rather from a place of curiosity.

So that is what Genie and I did in this discussion. She started with her mission (and the mission of her organization https://www.thehumananimalconnection.org/) to change the way humanity relates to animals. She wants to help people better communicate with the animals and understand that they have emotions, intentions, desires, and opinions. Her hope is that once people do that, it will be much harder to mistreat the animals they interact with.

The way she drives towards this mission is by showing people that it is possible to directly communicate with an animal (through a kind of telepathic connection), if you can enter the right mindset. She told stories of the connections she's made with dogs, cats, sheep, donkeys, horses, and many other animals. Although you may be skeptical, her accomplishments are pretty well documented showing that she has something figured out. The list includes an Emmy award-winning film, a bestselling book (The Human-Animal Connection), the President's volunteer service award for her work with over 4,000 service members/veterans, and her specialty, a therapy program that helps shy and traumatized dogs recover and heal.

If you love animals or just love learning about a new aspect of life that you were not familiar with before, this is a great episode for you. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

This is our first go at What's the value? - Business Edition and I thought no better guest to kick it off with than Diane. Diane is the founder and CEO of BizLove (https://bizlove.com/) a strategic consultancy that helps organizations transform from within and express their story to the world. They bridge the disciplines of storytelling and strategy to deliver integrated solutions for businesses.

Not only that, Diane (or "D") is also my former boss. When I first decided to leave my "traditional" job at IBM, I wasn't sure what the next move was going to be for me. Then I stumbled across this company, BizLove, on LinkedIn and was instantly intrigued. There was so much about their mission, culture, and style that felt right to me. Something about the way they blended core consulting and strategy skills with the more artistic, free flowing nature of story telling.

That "blending" and balancing of two, seemingly opposed, concepts came up a lot in my discussion with D. In so many ways, that is what she and BizLove are all about. At the deepest of levels, the value BizLove brings (and the most important value for D) is seeing the true, inherent value in others, seeing them for who they are--all parts of them, and helping them balance it to extract the best version of themselves. That may sound abstract or fluffy, but when you meet D you see that it is very real--and her clients see it too.

Since I know her well, this conversation was also fun because we were able to flow and delve into topics at deeper levels. We talked about why she had such a passion for this work, why she is so good at it, and if she honestly thinks the business world will ever truly value it as much as it should. We also took it a little philosophical, trying to understand the role love plays in the world, understanding masculine and feminine energies, and questioning what it means to be a leader.

I thank D a ton for being on and showing that conversations like this (about philosophy, storytelling, love, harmony, values, etc.) are very relevant and applicable in the business world-- not just to make the world a better place, but to make your organization better as well.

My guest, Andrea, and I spent an hour trying to make sense of a seemingly simple word-- "joy." If joy is your guiding light what happens when the thing you think you need to do does not result in joy? Does that mean you are doing the wrong thing or are you just a bad person?

Is all joy the same? Is the joy of partying in college, being free, and having a good time with friends; is that joy the same as the joy you get caring for a sick loved one? Should we be using the same term to explain the feeling of helping your sister bath because she is too weak from cancer treatments to do it herself?

If you are one of the "lucky" ones who has the ability and the tolerance to deal with suffering, look passed it, and find ways to endure so that you can still have joy in life--is that a gift or a curse? Why are joy and suffering so interconnected?

When I have a guest who has had such deep, life changing experiences, it feels like such an opportunity to explore questions like these and try to make sense of it all. Andrea is that guest, as she's dealt with a difficult childhood, abusive relationships, becoming a mom to her younger sister, and then watching her sister/daughter die at the age of 15 from cancer. These are horrific experiences, which don't even get into what life has been like since her sister passed away (lost friendships, the grieving process, depression, etc.).

Fortunately there are people like Andrea in this world who go through these experiences and then try to use them to find/bring more joy in the world. It sounds counter intuitive, if not impossible. But Andrea now spends much of her life as a patient advocate who founded the nonprofit Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association. Andrea is the CEO and co-founder of Cancer University, a for-profit, social-benefit, digital health company. She is also an author of a medical memoir titled Better Off Bald: A Life in 147 Days.

It was truly special to spend time with Andrea and have an authentic conversation with her about it all. To try to understand if it is actually possible to find joy in a life filled with so much suffering. I hope you guys enjoy this one as much as I did.  

Honesty and integrity are amazing values. When we can tap into who we truly are and are confident enough to share it with the world, it relieves a massive burden. We no longer worry about trying to be who we think we should be, but rather just are who we are. It brings on a feelings of freedom and liberation. But it begs a critical question...how do we know when we are being honest?

That might seem like a silly question, but it is a really critical one. As my guest, Kiran, and I discussed, if you are going to approach life with a deep confidence in your ability to be honest with yourself and others, you better make sure that confidence is warranted. How do you know you are actually being honest with yourself? How do you know your ego isn't deceiving you, so you can take a short cut to that feeling of freedom/liberation?

These are the questions Kiran and I grappled with throughout the show. She was a perfect dance partner too, because she's done a lot of work to to ensure she KNOWS that she is being honest. So it was really interesting to poke, prod, and pressure test that confidence to see what it was rooted in. We even looked at some personal examples, like her own divorce, to see if there were times she lied to herself in the past.

As way of background and context, Kiran is an entrepreneur and advocate for self empowerment, equity, and helping women achieve success and visibility (https://roaringahead.com/). She hosts her own podcast, “You Are Not Invisible After 50" where she focuses on helping women who are over 50 (and also women of color) realize they still have value and purpose in this world (despite how society makes them feel sometimes).

There was a ton of rich philosophical topics to discuss about Kiran's work, so we spent the end of the discussion exploring those. We talked about how hard it is for someone like me (a 39 year old, white male) to understand what it is like to be in her shoes. We also tried to work through the philosophical reasons our society often mistreats or undervalues older women. This was a super thought provoking discussion, so a big thanks to Kiran for being on.

Terry is a writer (https://www.terrybartleywriter.com/) who also teaches and hosts a podcast. His writing focuses on marginalized characters and communities to try and give them more of a voice and a sense of belonging. Given Terry's background, growing up in a poor, single parent home, with ADHD and as a queer person living in West Virginia; he has a deep understanding of what it means to feel marginalized and not fit in. That is why he feels so strongly about giving back and helping others.

I noticed right away how observant and self reflective Terry was, which I guess isn't all that surprising for a writer, but it was interesting to hear how his ADHD played into it as well. He explained how ADHD allows you to think differently, make connections across concepts, and creates a strong need to understand things before you can focus on them. Although it comes with challenges, those traits have served him really well in his life.

Towards the end of the discussion we spent some time talking about his writing as well as his passion for politics and social issues. I'll be honest, I kind of struggled at times to lock down the thoughts/points I was trying to get across, but we had a really interesting discussion about greed, selfishness, and marginalization. Terry has an optimistic view that corporations are starting to realize that it actually benefits them to be more inclusive. He believes the new Black Panther movie is an example of this, where black actors and directors were able to gain notoriety while the studio behind the movie also benefitted with great profits.

The questions we grappled with though, was this really a positive thing? Although it is great, well deserved, and long over due; will it actually solve the problem if it is still rooted in profits and greed. Is the world actually a better place if the powers that be only allow marginalized people to thrive when it benefits them as well. Maybe it is the best we can hope for, but maybe it just perpetuates the same problems in a new way. Either way, I really enjoyed this conversation and getting to learn a little more about Terry's perspective on life.

Anne is a Human Resources leader known for developing new programs/training and improving employee retention and leadership performance (https://donovanhrsolutions.com/). She wants to help employers realize the importance of building trust, respect, and recognition in the work place. She believes it will make for a better employee experience, better results for the organization, and frankly a better world for all of us.

That is what Anne does, but as with most guests I have on this show, the story behind why she does it, how she got here, and what makes her approach life the way she does is even more interesting. Anne was like a lot of people, a successful workaholic, living in NY trying to get ahead. Then as it always does, life happened. She was laid off, began questioning everything and decided to pack up her things and move to Montana. She realized relationships, nature, and facing her fears were far more important than the things she valued before.

The thread that ran throughout this discussion was "trust." That was Anne's most important value and we talked about it from various different levels. We talked about trusting other people, we talked about trusting the universe, and we talked about trusting yourself. For Anne, although there are risks, putting trust out into the world leads to a much richer, more fulfilled life. She has seen it work first hand for her and now she wants to take that experience and help employers realize the power of it as well.

As always, we also spent some time challenging the idea of trust. Particularly in the work place, employers often fear that too much trust will lead to entitlement, laziness, and ultimately a lack of productivity. If we are being honest, that fear is not unfounded, so we discussed how to find the right balance between trust and accountability. At its core the issue of trust comes down to perspective. Are you willing to be optimistic about humanity and have faith that your trust in others will be rewarded; or do you think trusting humanity is ultimately naive and will get your burned?

What a beautiful, thought provoking discussion about truth, faith, and morality. Branch is an author, poet, and storyteller who speaks about choice and consequence, accepting or avoiding personal responsibility, and the power of truth (you can view his work here- https://www.manaopublishing.com/).

What made this discussion so good, was firstly the self reflection Branch has gone through in his own life. As many of us have, he has lived multiple lives in one. He's been a teacher, a corporate salesperson, a business owner, a husband, and now an author/storyteller. Throughout all of it he has taken time to reflect on what he thought, what he believed, and the type of person he was. Through that reflection he's come to some conclusions about faith, God, and truth that now guide his life.

That is second part of what made this discussion so good. Branch has first hand experience and evidence of how faith in God turned his life around for the better. He has studied and explored the ways his faith in God made his life worth living. He has deep conviction in what he believes, but this is not blind faith. It is a faith Branch was open to discussing, examining, and even challenging. We debated the benefits of faith but also the very real dangers and pitfalls of it. We discussed if "God" gave us the tools to ever really know the "truth?" And we questioned if free will can exist in a world controlled by God?

Maybe my favorite line from the conversation was a quote Branch threw out from Bob Dylan-- "You're gonna have to serve somebody; well, it may be the devil, or it may be the Lord, but you're gonna have to serve somebody" This conversation, and I believe our goal in life, is trying to decipher who that somebody actually is?

As always, for those interested in getting more philosophy in their lives or just want to support the cause, please check out my Patreon page- patreon.com/whatsthevalue