Why do clients keep reacting in ways they regret, even when they know better?

In this episode of the Divorce Coaches Academy® Podcast, Tracy Callahan speaks with conflict expert, mediator, DCA® Certified ADR Divorce Coach, and author Masha Rusanov about the unconscious patterns that keep people trapped in recurring divorce and co-parenting conflict.

Masha introduces the Exhale, Explore, Engage® framework from her book, Repatterned: How to Transform Your Conflict Defaults and Reclaim Your Life. Together, they explore why familiar reactions become automatic under stress, how nervous system activation limits access to communication skills, and why waiting for the other person to change gives away personal agency.

They also discuss how divorce coaches can help clients recognize their contribution to a conflict dynamic without assigning blame or stepping outside the scope of coaching. High conflict does not mean a resolution-focused approach will not work. It means clients may first need the awareness and capacity to interrupt old patterns and choose a different response.

Lasting change does not begin when conflict disappears. It begins when we recognize the pattern and realize we have another choice.

Learn more about Masha:

Masha Rusanov is a conflict expert, DCA® Certified ADR Divorce Coach, ICF Certified Coach, and a mediator with a Master's in Negotiation, Conflict Resolution, and Peacebuilding. She works with individuals and organizations navigating conflict and high-stakes relationship dynamics. Before building her divorce coaching and conflict resolution practice, she spent over two decades in tech at companies like Google and Intuit. "Repatterned" is her latest book. She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area, California, with her blended family.

https://www.masharusanov.com/

Purchase Repatterned:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1957917911