What should parents do when a teen becomes aggressive — or even physically threatening?

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen address one of the most difficult and rarely talked-about experiences in parenting: feeling afraid of your own child. They break down why explosive or aggressive behavior can emerge in teens, and how parents can respond in ways that prioritize safety, de-escalation, and long-term connection.

In this episode, you'll learn: 

✔️ Why teen aggression can happen — from brain development to individual vulnerabilities 

✔️ The difference between isolated incidents and genuinely concerning patterns 

✔️ Key warning signs parents should not ignore 

✔️ How to de-escalate intense situations safely (and what not to do) 

✔️ When to involve a trusted adult, therapist, or support system

 ✔️ How to create a simple, realistic safety plan for your family 

✔️ When it may be necessary to call mobile crisis or 911 

✔️ How to reconnect and move forward after a difficult incident

Whether this has happened once or is becoming a pattern, this episode offers clear, compassionate, and practical guidance — and reminds parents: you are not alone.

📺 Chapters

00:00 How Common Is Teen Aggression? What the Research Shows

01:38 A Parent's Real Question: "I'm Afraid of My Own Son"

03:15 Safety is Paramount

04:03 Why This Happens: The Teenage Brain Explained

04:58 Why This Happens: ADHD, Anxiety & Other Contributing Factors

06:13 Why This Happens: Environment, Stress & Triggers

06:54 Isolated Incident or Pattern? How to Tell the Difference

08:11 Warning Signs: Red Flags Parents Shouldn’t Ignore

11:22 What to Do in the Moment of Violent Behavior

12:07 De-Escalation Strategies That Actually Work

14:31 When to Involve a Trusted Adult or Support System

16:46 Safety Planning: How to Prepare Ahead of Time

19:45 When to Call 911 or Mobile Crisis Services

21:14 What to Do After a Violent Incident

28:01 What Now? Next Steps for Parents

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💬 Questions or topic suggestions: [email protected]

DISCLAIMER: The Parenting Pair Podcast is designed for informational and educational purposes only. Do not rely
 on the information presented in this podcast as as a substitute or replacement for professional -- psychological or medical -- advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have concerns about you or a family member's well being, please contact a licensed mental health professional or physician.