When a teen or tween is experiencing a mental health crisis—such as depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts—parents and caregivers often feel scared, exhausted, and increasingly isolated.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, clinical psychologists Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen explore how to truly show up for families navigating a teen mental health crisis. They discuss a painful and often unspoken reality: families in crisis are frequently left out of social gatherings, receive fewer invitations, and feel increasingly alone—not because others don’t care, but because people don’t know what to say or how to help.

This conversation explores why that withdrawal happens and how it can unintentionally deepen stress, shame, and disconnection for parents already under immense emotional strain. Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen offer practical, compassionate guidance for friends, extended family members, and communities who want to support families without overstepping, fixing, or offering unwanted advice.

Together, they explore:

• Why parents of teens in a mental health crisis often feel isolated, excluded, and forgotten

• How uncertainty and discomfort cause people to pull away—even with good intentions

• What meaningful support actually looks like during a mental health crisis

• How to communicate care without minimizing, judging, or problem-solving

• Simple ways to stay connected with families navigating teen mental health challenges

• Why presence, consistency, and patience matter more than saying the “right” thing

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00  How to Support Families Dealing With a Teen’s Mental Health Crisis  

01:12  Mental Health Crises vs. Medical Crises: Why Responses Differ

03:09  Why Families in Crisis Often Feel Isolated  

04:49  The Invisible Stress Parents Carry 

05:29  What Actually Helps Families Feel Less Alone  

06:40  Practical Ways to Show Up 

06:53  1) Keep Showing Up, Even When It’s Uncomfortable  

10:05  2) Let Families Know They Still Matter

10:48  3) Listen Without Trying to Fix 

13:06  4) Keep Invitations Open Without Pressure  

14:11  5) Handle Shared Information With Trust and Care  

17:07  The Difference You Can Make 

19:06  Why Kindness Takes Courage

If you care about a family parenting a teen or tween through depression, anxiety, or a mental health crisis—and want to support them without increasing pressure or distance—this episode offers clear, compassionate guidance.

Watch this episode Here on YouTube or 
💬 Have a story or question? Email [email protected] — we love hearing from you!

🔔 Subscribe to @theparentingpair for evidence-based conversations on parenting teens, mental health, and family well-being.
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Middle school is often the point where parents notice a sudden drop in motivation—and it can be confusing, frustrating, and even worrying to watch a once-engaged child seem checked out or uninterested. Sometimes what looks like “laziness” or a lack of effort is often something very different beneath the surface.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen unpack what’s really going on when teens appear unmotivated. They explore how developmental changes, school demands, emotional overwhelm, and fear of failure can all impact motivation during the middle and high school years—and why traditional approaches like pressure, rewards, or repeated reminders often backfire.

The conversation focuses on how parents can respond in ways that support confidence, autonomy, and emotional safety, rather than increasing resistance or shutdown. Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen explain how motivation is closely tied to a child’s sense of competence, connection, and being understood—and how small shifts in parenting language and expectations can make a meaningful difference.

Together, they discuss:

• Why kids usually already feel bad when they’re falling behind
• How control, pressure, and repeated advice can reduce motivation over time
• The importance of respect and autonomy in maintaining engagement
• Moving from a “director” role to a “mentor” role as kids grow
• Why punishment doesn’t build motivation—and what has a better chance of success
• Simple environmental shifts that can support effort and follow-through

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 — When Your Child Struggles: Parent Support is What Truly Matters

00:47 — Understanding Motivation in Middle School: How Parents Can Help

02:16 — Why Interest in Anything Is a Positive Sign

05:14 — Kids Usually Know When They’re Struggling

05:29 — Why Control and Constant Suggestions Can Backfire

07:03 — Why Teens Value Feeling Respected

07:44 — Shifting From “Director” to “Mentor” as a Parent

09:26 — The Hard Truth: You Can’t Make Your Teen Do Anything

11:31 — Two Very Different Ways to Talk About the Same Issue

13:26 — Book Recommendation: 10 to 25 — The Science of Motivating Young People

14:47 — Practicing Radical Acceptance of Different Paths and Timelines

16:39 — Why Punishment Does Not Create Motivation

18:17 — Holding High Expectations While Still Believing in Your Child

20:00 — Protecting the Parent–Child Relationship Above All

26:05 — Kids Do Best When Motivation Comes From Within

27:01 — Small Environmental Changes That Can Support Motivation

31:15 — When It’s Time to Seek Additional Support

If you’re parenting a tween or teen who seems disengaged, resistant, or discouraged—and you’re not sure how to help without making things worse—this episode offers compassionate, developmentally informed guidance to help you support motivation while protecting your relationship.

Resources that we mentioned in this episode:

• The Explosive Child by Dr. Ross Greene https://drrossgreene.com/the-explosive-child.htm
• 10-25 The Science of Motivating Young People: A Groundbreaking Approach to Leading the Next Generation and Making Your Own Life Easier by Dr. David Yeager https://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/David-Yeager/200441584
• The Parenting Pair Podcast, Episode 32 Stop Relying on Willpower: Tips on Teen Motivation and Behavior Change (the make it easy, make it hard strategy). https://drscaronandallen.com/podcast/episode/stop-relying-on-willpower-tips-on-teen-motivation-and-behavior-change/

Find us on our website
watch this episode here on Youtube or 
follow us @theparentingpair on Instagram

💬 Have a story or question? Email [email protected] — we love hearing from you!

🔔 Subscribe to @theparentingpair for more expert insights on raising confident, resilient kids and teens.

Why do our teens keep messing up — and why do we sometimes lose our cool? 😫

In this episode, we dig into why mistakes are a normal part of adolescence — because teens are human just like us! We explore how their curiosity, need for independence, and brain development lead to errors, and why that’s actually healthy for their growth.

We also talk about how our reactions as parents can often be driven by stress and fear, and how taking a moment to pause and breathe can transform those moments into opportunities for connection and understanding.

Here are some highlights from the episode:
00:00 — A New Year Reframe: “Being” Something Instead of “Doing” Something

08:16 — “Why Does My Teen Keep Messing Up?”

09:09 — Why Parents Get So Worried When Kids Make Mistakes

10:16 — The Real Reason Parents Overreact

10:37 — Why Teens Mess Up More Often Than We Expect

10:40 — Reason 1: Kids Are Human Too

10:43 — Reason 2: Development Is Still in Progress

17:23 — Why Pushing Limits Is a Normal Part of Adolescence

17:35 — Why the Conclusions We Jump To Are Often Wrong

18:04 — Possibility A: Your Teen May Be Doing Something Developmentally Normal

18:12 — Possibility B: Putting the Behavior in Context

18:23 — Possibility C: The Behavior May Be a Reaction

18:56 — How Challenging Behaviors Can Reflect Positive Intentions

19:24 — Possibility D: When Behavior Signals a Skills’ Deficit

20:56 — Shifting the Lens: Choosing to Look for the Good

22:49 — Why Parents Are More Likely to Lose It

26:06 — How to Pause and Avoid Overreacting

27:33 — The Cost of Parenting From Anxiety

29:43 — “Staying Here”: A Powerful Parenting Mantra

31:18 — Book Recommendation: Eight Setbacks That Can Make a Child a Success

Join us as we share real stories, practical tips, and a fresh perspective on handling mistakes with curiosity rather than overreaction. Because when we see their missteps as part of normal development, we can stay calmer, more compassionate, and build stronger relationships.

🎧 Tune in now — because parenting teens doesn’t have to feel like a constant battle. Let’s navigate these tricky moments together, with patience and a little humor.

Find us on our website
watch this episode here on Youtube or 
follow us @theparentingpair on Instagram

💬 Have a story or question? Email [email protected] — we love hearing from you!

Do you ever find yourself second-guessing your parenting decisions… not because they feel wrong, but because you’re worried what other parents might think?

Yeah — us too.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Suzanne Allen and Dr. Annalise Caron dive into five powerful mindset shifts to help you stop spiraling and start parenting from a place of confidence, clarity, and calm.

You’ll learn:

✔️ How to connect with your best self as a parent

✔️ Why judgment is unavoidable — and fleeting

✔️ How to stop wasting energy trying to mind-read other parents

✔️ Why “your family, your call” is the healthiest mantra you can adopt

✔️ The power of showing kindness to other families — and yourself

🎯 Whether you’ve been side-eyed at the pickup line, judged over a playdate rule, or just feel pressure to “get it all right,” this episode is a breath of fresh air.

🧠 You’ll leave with practical tools, real-world examples, and permission to parent with confidence — even when your approach looks different.

⏱️ Chapters:

00:00 Connecting With Your Best Self as a Parent

01:55 Why parents feel judged—and why it matters

06:07 Mindset Shift #1: Reconnect with your best parenting self

08:40 Mindset Shift #2: Accept that judgment is fleeting

09:43 Mindset Shift #3: You’re not a mind reader

11:48 Mindset Shift #4: Your family, your call

14:48 Mindset Shift #5: Extend kindness to other parents

15:25 Reflection: How these shifts can help

17:03 What now: Modeling confidence for your teen

📩 Got a question for a future episode?  Email us at [email protected]

Find us on our website
watch this episode here on Youtube or 
follow us @theparentingpair on Instagram

🔔 Subscribe for more expert parenting insights on raising confident, resilient teens.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Suzanne Allen and Dr. Annalise Caron dive into the complex world of parenting children and teens with ADHD. They explore common parent feelings—from exhaustion and frustration to dark thoughts—and emphasize the importance of self-compassion and understanding.

Together they discuss:

● How ADHD symptoms can look different during puberty and adolescence, especially in girls

● The difference between knowing what to do and being able to do it, with relatable stories and insights

● Practical ways to support your child's growth, resilience, and self-understanding

● The significance of parent self-care, seeking support, and fostering a compassionate mindset

● Tips for managing societal judgments and building a supportive community

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 — Using Stories to Understand ADHD
02:49 — Metaphors That Help Explain What ADHD Feels Like
04:00 — The “Race Car Brain” Explained
06:14 — Why “Pressing the Gas” Can Be So Hard With ADHD
08:10 — The Two Sides of Having a Race Car Brain
08:59 — Why Sharing These Metaphors Helps Others Understand ADHD
09:56 — Why ADHD Is Hard: It’s Often Invisible
11:34 — ADHD Can Feel Like Sailing Without Wind
15:00 — Common Misconceptions About Kids With ADHD
16:38 — Why Teens Have Lower Dopamine Levels
17:23 — Why Motivation Is Harder for Kids With ADHD
18:17 — Practical Recommendations Moving Forward

This episode offers empathetic guidance and real-world advice for parents, caregivers, and anyone supporting a young person with ADHD. Remember, you're not alone—support, understanding, and patience can make a world of difference.

Tune in now to learn how to nurture your child's potential while taking care of yourself along the way. And don't forget to share this episode with friends or family who might find it helpful!

Find us on our website
watch this episode here on Youtube or 
follow us @theparentingpair on Instagram

🔔 Subscribe for more expert parenting insights on raising confident, resilient teens.

The holiday season is meant to be joyful and connecting—but for many families, it can quickly become overwhelming. Between big gatherings, clashing personalities, differing expectations, and the emotional needs of teens and tweens (especially those with ADHD, depression, or other challenges), parents often feel stretched thin and unsure how to navigate it all.

In this grounding episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen break down how to manage holiday stress, communicate clearly with extended family, protect your child’s emotional needs, and set realistic expectations so the season feels more peaceful and less pressured.

They explore the emotional realities families face—when relatives don’t understand your teen’s behavior, when unsolicited advice makes things worse, when expectations clash, and when you feel caught in the middle trying to keep everyone happy. Through practical strategies and compassionate guidance, they offer tools that help parents approach the holidays with more clarity, connection, and confidence.

Together, Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen unpack:

• Why holidays can feel overwhelming for teens—especially those with ADHD, depression, or anxiety
• How to help extended family understand your teen’s needs without oversharing
• What to do when relatives intervene in ways that worsen the situation
• Communication strategies that reduce tension and increase support
• Why a single “family ally” can shift the whole dynamic
• How to set boundaries and roles with kindness and clarity
• The power of adjusting expectations—and why it protects your wellbeing
• When it might be healthier to modify traditions (and why that’s okay)
• How to approach holiday plans when you feel judged, stressed, or stretched thin

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 — Why the Holidays Can Feel Stressful for Families (Especially With Teens)

01:32 — The Holiday Season Can Be Fun and Stressful

02:11 — Stress and Family Management Strategies for the Holiday Season

02:26 — Tip 1: Don’t Assume Others Understand Your Child’s Needs

04:46 — Helping Family Members Understand Your Child’s Experience

08:03 — Tip 2: Considering Other Perspectives Within the Family

10:05 — Tip 3: Being Clear About What Helps and What Doesn’t

13:05 — Why Sometimes You Only Need One Supportive Ally

15:05 — Aligning Your Expectations With Reality During the Holidays

17:10 — Redefining Family Traditions When Needed

If your holidays often feel chaotic, emotionally loaded, or hard to predict, this episode offers evidence-based, compassionate tools to help your family feel more grounded—so you can focus on what truly matters.

Find us on our website
watch us here on Youtube or 
follow us @theparentingpair on Instagram

🔔 Subscribe for more expert parenting insights on raising confident, resilient teens.

Behavior change doesn’t happen just through willpower—as many people actually think. In this episode, we explore how shaping the environments around teens can make healthy habits more likely — and success more achievable.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen unpack one of the most powerful concepts in behavioral science: how to make the behaviors you want to see easier, and the behaviors you want to avoid harder. Instead of relying on motivation alone—something that naturally fluctuates—they explore concrete tools parents can use to shift habits for themselves and their kids.

They discuss why environment design matters more than willpower alone, how friction and ease can shape habits automatically, and why families often get stuck when change feels too big, too vague, or too effortful. Through relatable examples and practical insights, Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen guide parents on how to use behavioral principles to reduce conflict, build consistency, and set their children and teens up for success.

Together, they explore:

• Why behavior change is affected by context, not just character
• How to make your preferred or goal actions easier, faster, and more automatic
• How to increase friction around impulsive, unwanted, or unhelpful behaviors
• How parents can model this motivational approach in their own lives
• How to talk to your tween or teen about increasing their motivation and making behavior change easier for them too

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 — Behavior Change Is Not Just About Willpower

01:21 — Why Discipline Feels So Difficult

01:54 — Common Thoughts We Have About Behavior Change

02:31 — Is It Really a Lack of Willpower or Self-Control?

03:16 — Motivation Comes After Behavior Change

04:02 — The “Make It Easy or Make It Hard” Strategy

04:23 — How to Make Hard Tasks Easier to Do

06:09 — Strategies to Make Unwanted Behaviors Harder

08:21 — The Importance of Habits in Daily Life

10:19 — The Downside of Telling Teens Exactly What to Do

11:39 — Kids and Teens Often Have Great Ideas

13:10 — Why Letting Kids Generate Their Own Solutions Works

14:40 — When to Take the Next Step and Seek Extra Help

16:30 — Shifting From Motivation to Design

17:08 — A Fun Activity for Parents to “Make it Easy” or “Make it Hard”

If you’ve ever felt stuck trying to help your child or teen follow through—or wanted to change your own habits but didn’t know where to start—this episode offers science-backed, achievable tools to make change smoother, simpler, and far more likely to last.

Previous Podcast on Teen Autonomy that Suzanne mentioned in this episode:

watch here on Youtube

or listen here on Apple or here on Spotify

🔔 Subscribe for more expert parenting insights on raising confident, resilient kids and teens.
 @theparentingpair

Lying is one of the behaviors parents fear most—but in most cases, it’s far less alarming than it feels in the moment. This episode matters because understanding why kids and teens lie can help parents respond with calm, empathy, and connection instead of panic and shutdown.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen take a grounded, myth-busting look at lying across childhood and adolescence. Drawing from clinical experience and real-life examples, they explain why lying is developmentally common, what it does not mean about your teen’s character, and how parents can keep the relationship strong while still holding boundaries.

They explore the emotional, social, and developmental drivers behind lying—like avoiding judgment, seeking independence, protecting friendships, embarrassment, and the desire for privacy. The conversation also highlights how ADHD, depression, memory gaps, and low activation can lead to misunderstandings that look like lies but aren’t intentional at all.

Most importantly, Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen share practical strategies for staying regulated, listening more effectively, reducing lecturing, and creating a home environment where honesty feels safer. They also outline when chronic or risky lying warrants additional support.

Together, they help parents understand:

• The real developmental reasons kids and teens lie
• Why lying is usually not malicious or manipulative
• How to respond without catastrophizing or damaging trust
• What to do when you can anticipate lying
• How ADHD and depression can affect truth-telling
• When patterns of lying may signal deeper concerns
• How modeling honesty (even imperfectly) supports teens
• What you can do this week to help your teen feel safe telling the truth

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 — When Kids Lie: Understanding Normal Childhood Behavior

01:26 — Why Does My Teen Lie? Common Parenting Concerns

03:29 — Two Typical Reasons Kids and Teens Lie

07:04 — What Parents Often Think When Their Kids Lie

08:22 — Additional Reasons Teens May Lie

11:33 — How Keeping an Open Mind Leads to Better Understanding

12:48 — Helpful Ways to Approach Lying

15:09 — The Power of Simply Listening

16:18 — What to Do When You Can Predict the Lie

18:28 — The Importance of Modeling Honesty as Parents

19:51 — When Lying Becomes Something to Pay Attention To

20:39 — Why Kids With ADHD May Lie More Often

23:56 — Other Motivations Behind Lying

24:24 — Reflecting on What You’d Like to Approach Differently as a Parent

If you’ve ever worried that your teen’s lying means something is “wrong,” this episode will help you breathe, zoom out, and use these moments to strengthen connection instead of fear.

🔔 Subscribe to The Parenting Pair Podcast for more expert guidance on raising emotionally healthy, connected kids and teens.

📲 Connect with us:
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Online sports betting has become one of the fastest-growing risks for teens and tweens—often long before parents realize it’s on their child’s radar. This episode matters because parents today are navigating an entirely new digital landscape where gambling is marketed as entertainment, built into sports culture, and accessible 24/7 from a phone. Understanding how to educate our children and teens as well as how to respond—calmly, clearly, and effectively—can make all the difference.

In this episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen break down the rise of youth online gambling and sports betting, why adolescents are uniquely vulnerable to addictive platforms, and what parents can do before, during, and after concerns arise. Drawing from clinical experience and current research, they explain how gambling behaviors intersect with developmental impulsivity, social pressure, and mental health—and how parents can respond without shame or panic.

Dr. Caron and Dr. Allen also discuss why early conversations about risk, money, and digital habits are essential protective factors.  Together, they explore:

• How recent legal changes and the proliferation of betting apps have made gambling more accessible to teens and young adults.
• Why online sports betting is uniquely appealing and can be dangerous for teens
• How adolescent brain development increases gambling vulnerability
• The ways gambling and loot boxes in video games create habits that can lead to problematic behavior.
• Warning signs to watch for, such as increased irritability, money loss, or withdrawal from activities.
• What to say—and what not to say—if you learn that your child or teen is gambling
• Why understanding these behaviors with compassion can help reduce shame and foster healthier choices.

Key moments from this episode:

00:00 — Why Online Sports Betting Is Becoming a Major Risk for Teens
05:10 — How Teens Get Exposed to Gambling Without Parents Realizing
08:54 — How to Start the Conversation About Online Gambling With Your Child
11:45 — Communication Strategies That Foster Openness and Honesty
14:33 — How Gambling Trends Shifted After the Pandemic
16:53 — Understanding the Highs and Lows That Gambling Involves
21:15 — How Teens Access Betting Through Apps and Digital Platforms
24:15 — Video Games: How They May Introduce Gambling-Like Behaviors to Kids
29:14 — Using “Delay Practice” to Set Boundaries Around Gaming
30:16 — What Intermittent Reinforcement Is—and Why It Keeps Anyone Hooked
33:03 — Why the Teen Brain Is Especially Vulnerable to Gambling Apps
34:36 — Early Warning Signs of Gambling-Related Problems in Teens
37:29 — What Parents Should Do When They Suspect a Gambling Problem

If you’ve been worried about relentless gambling ads, your teen’s sports-betting exposure, or how to address risky online behavior without damaging trust, this episode will give you research-informed, practical steps to guide your family with clarity and confidence.

Furthermore, if you have concerns that you or a family member may have a gambling problem or addiction, you or your loved one can call or text 1-800-GAMBLER for private and confidential information and support.

🔔 Subscribe for more expert parenting insights on raising healthy, resilient kids and teens.

Why do so many teens and tweens struggle with sleep—and what can parents actually do to help? 

In this insightful episode of The Parenting Pair Podcast, Dr. Annalise Caron and Dr. Suzanne Allen sit down with clinical psychologists, Dr. Allison Shale and Dr. Andrea Roth, to unpack the science and psychology behind adolescents’ sleep challenges.

They explore why biological shifts, technology use, and academic pressure make it harder for teens to fall asleep—and how family routines, communication, and environmental changes can make a big difference.

Together, they discuss:

• The biological changes in sleep patterns during adolescence
• How school schedules and technology affect sleep quality
• Why “catching up” on weekends doesn’t really work
• Ways to relate to your teens regarding realistic bedtime expectations 
• How to talk about sleep without power struggles
• Practical strategies to support better sleep hygiene for the whole family

Here are some highlights from the episode:

00:00 – Be Kind to Yourself: Supporting Your Teen’s Sleep Without Guilt

03:09 – Recommended Reading: The Essential Guide to Children’s Sleep

04:20 – How Much Sleep Do Teens and Tweens Really Need?

05:59 – Expert Advice for Parents Struggling With Teen Sleep Challenges

07:43 – The Hidden Anxiety about Sleep Deprivation in Teens

08:09 – Biological Changes That Disrupt Teen and Tween Sleep Patterns

10:46 – Should You Let Your Teen Sleep In on Weekends?

14:12 – Understanding Sleep Inertia and “Social Jet Lag” in Adolescents

17:48 – Can Morning Sunlight Help Teens Reset Their Sleep Cycles?

20:34 – Why Parents Should Acknowledge Their Own Sleep Struggles

21:39 – When to Seek Professional Help for Your Teen’s Sleep Issues

25:27 – Why Teens May Listen Better to Other Adults Than Their Parents

26:42 – Why Melatonin Shouldn’t Be the First Solution for Teen Sleep

31:37 – Behavioral Strategies to Help Teens Improve Their Sleep

If you’ve ever found yourself worrying about your teen staying up too late—or being exhausted and moody the next morning—this episode offers both reassurance and research-based tools to help your family rest easier. 

Additionally, you can check out Dr. Roth and Dr. Shale's new book, with Dr. Shelby Harris, The Essential Guide To Children's Sleep: A Tired Caregiver's Workbook for Every Age and Stage or you can find them on instagram at @essentialkidsleep.

And as always, share this episode with fellow parents who may find it helpful—because caring for our family's sleep is essential for good mental and physical health.

🔔 Subscribe to The Parenting Pair Podcast for more expert guidance on raising resilient, healthy teens.

Watch on YouTube:  The Parenting Pair

Connect with us:
📩 Email: [email protected]
📱 Instagram: @‌theparentingpair