An exploration of humanity's most straightforward question that turns out not to be straightforward at all: where are we?

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We examine why the Big Bang wasn't an explosion from a point in space but rather the expansion of space itself—happening everywhere simultaneously—which makes asking "where did it occur?" a conceptually broken question. We discover why every observer in the universe legitimately sees themselves at the centre of their own observable sphere (it's geometry, not narcissism), explore why the universe has neither a meaningful centre nor an edge (it's either infinite or loops back on itself), and learn that the cosmic microwave background's perfect symmetry confirms the cosmological principle: on large scales, no location is special. Using balloon analogies with proper caveats, we reveal why "here" remains the only honest answer to questions about cosmic positioning, and why the universe operates like a filing system that considers "everywhere" a perfectly acceptable address whilst refusing to provide the reference points we keep requesting.

AI Transparency: In a universe of AI-generated content, we believe in being transparent about what's human and what's not. Your time is valuable, and you deserve to know what you're experiencing. The narrator, David, is a professional voice actor who has digitized his voice through ElevenLabs' voice cloning technology and is fairly compensated for his vocal performance. Thumbnails are created with OpenArt AI, and music/sound effects come from Pixabay (which are generated by human artists). Everything else-the writing, jokes, research, sound editing, and interdimensional coffee consumption, is 100% human-made by a human.

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