Where's My Freaking Dressing Room?!

This week Alex and Helen discuss five main points surrounding an age-old controversy: how being a singer is much harder than it looks.

• Encouraged to make it look effortless

Singers are constantly encouraged to make their performances look as elegant and graceful as possible (a particular gripe for upper voices!!). Perhaps audiences don’t want to know how much effort goes into singing a full 3-hour role on stage, but being asked to sing 28 bars of coloratura whilst looking like you’re enjoying yourself is not an easy feat.

• The practice problem

To make difficult singing look effortless takes hours and hours of practice but, as we’ve discussed before, singers have to be incredibly careful with practicing. The voice box is a precariously balanced set of muscles and every singer has to know their own limits and how much they can practice without doing injury or damage. As we’ve discussed before, mental practice, libretto translation and repertoire research are all important parts of the practice process without tiring out your vocal cords.

• You can’t SEE the thing!

It sounds pretty obvious but not being able to see the voice is another difficulty singers have to deal with. If you have a bruise on your leg, a swollen wrist, or an injured hand, these are things you can tangibly see which consequently helps you understand when things are getting better. With the voice, it is not so easy. In addition to that, an appointment to have a vocal scope check up often costs hundreds of pounds. As singers we have to rely on sensation and having a detailed understanding of how our voices feel. If something isn’t right, it’s vital we put ourselves and our voices first.

• Singing takes over every element of your life

Lots of things affect the voice - sleep (or lack of), diet, exercise routine, illness, natural speaking voice and so much more. As singers we have to take all these external factors into account. It’s not an easy thing to do!

• Shelf-life

Often singers feel as if they’re working against the clock, and if they haven’t established a significant career by the age of 30 then it’s not worth continuing. This is a horrid pressure to contend with alongside everything else which works against you in this industry. It’s crucial we remember that the voice is constantly changing, growing and developing. For some singers they might hit their stride in their early 30s as their technique and physiology are now working in tandem. What is more, the industry is not the same as 30 or 40 years ago. Singers are not scouted at the age of 18 to stand on the Covent Garden stage. In addition, what is required of singers is far more taxing, exhausting and demanding. To have the ability to withstand all of that takes many more years of training.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week Alex and Helen each share two personal stories where they made a decision to stand up for themselves in the industry. These stories discuss issues of pay, issues of respect/disrespect and issues of sexism.

Alex and Helen hope that in sharing these stories, they can encourage you to stand up for yourself. Setting your boundaries and knowing when your boundaries have been crossed is very important in this industry.

There are ways of stating your limits and expressing when things are unacceptable in a calm, clear and respectful manner. No one should be afraid of speaking out for fear of losing favour/future work/connections.

If we want to see the opera industry improve and foster better working conditions for those in it, it is our collective responsibility to make that happen and speak out when required.

Epiosde edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

With a brand new season comes a lot of new changes:

• We are really specialising now, talking to that core audience (of approximately 2 people?!) about the world of OPERA and what things are like backstage.
• Episodes will be coming out EVERY WEEK!
• We’re delighted to be introducing a brand new podcast segment, ‘Breakdown of the Week’ where we share something that’s not gone quite as we planned and how we dealt with it. To ease us into that, we thought we’d start the season proper with a whole episode on breakdowns.

In this episode we discuss what we call three ‘red flags’ which are signs that we’re heading for a breakdown, and offer some tips and support as to how we can stop that from happening.

1. Unable to rest

Often we find that when our responsibilities are piling up and the to do list keeps getting longer it’s incredibly hard to rest. Any time we try to take a break our mind is filled with all of our unfinished jobs, all the worries we have for the future, and we can’t seem to sit still. When we’re unable to rest, this is a ‘red flag’ that a future breakdown may be on the way. How can we address this?

We have to be as disciplined with scheduling downtime as we do with scheduling practice and all of our other regular commitments.

Restorative downtime means taking a proper mental break; more often than not, this means no screens. You could go for a walk, cook a meal, read a book, go for a run, or even have a nap. In this day and age every element of our lives can be found on our phones. If your restorative downtime is watching a Netflix series while you’re on your phone messaging colleagues about rehearsals, scheduling room bookings or checking your emails, it’s not really downtime.

For both of us, if our communication styles rapidly change it’s a sign that things are not going well and a breakdown may be on the horizon. For Alex, he finds himself unable to speak. For Helen, she develops an incredibly short temper. How can we handle these changes?

Both Helen and Alex are big advocates of meditation and mindfulness. These practices teach us how to be aware of ourselves and how to notice when significant changes occur. This means when our communication styles change because we feel stressed, under pressure and close to burnout, we are able to step outside of ourselves, see what is happening, and manage this pressured behaviour. When we realise we are not coping well, we then try and practice good self care, prioritising things such as a healthy diet, a good sleep routine and regular exercise (Of course, all of this is a lot easier said than done!)

Both Alex and Helen find that certain physical symptoms highlight when things are not going so well. Alex becomes unusually over-emotional and Helen often experiences stomach cramps and heart tremors. Of course, each person’s symptoms are unique and personal, but how can we deal with this?

Depending on your physical symptoms, our advice is simple: treat it! If you have stomach cramps, make yourself a ginger tea and adapt your diet to include gentle and soothing meals. If you have heart tremors, perhaps practice familiar breathing exercises. If you’re feeling emotional, be kind to yourself. Allow yourself to express your feelings.

If you feel it would help, tell those you’re working with that you are going through a difficult time. More often than not, those around you will support you and want to prioritise your mental and physical wellbeing.

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Where’s My Freaking Dressing Room?! hosted their first ever live episode recording as part of Opera Prelude’s OperaWorks conference day. This episode focusses on mental health in the opera industry, however, before getting into the heart of that discussion, the podcast wished to address the controversy surrounding diversity and inclusion and the OperaWorks conference. You can read the pod’s full statement here. As promised, we wished to promote the work of Music Master’s Diversity Audit Tool: I’M IN and we also wanted to re-share our

podcast research episode on the opera industry, Coronavirus and the 2020 resurgence of the Black Lives Matter movement.

Visualisation

The adrenaline that kicks in during an audition process can negatively impact mental health conditions such as anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder. To combat this Alex and Helen often use visualisation techniques. In the days leading up to an audition they will sit in a quiet room and run the audition process in their heads in great detail. Visualisation offers you the chance to experience as close as possible to the audition experience beforehand, allowing you to regain a sense of calm and control over the situation.

Journalling

For those with low self-esteem and depression rejections can be incredibly hard to handle. Alex and Helen suggest journalling straight after every single audition experience. In writing down exactly what happened and how it happened, you have a frank and objective account of the audition. In having written about the audition experience, when the result comes through (good or bad) you have an account of that day you can refer back to.

Pre-gig

Often the hype of the dressing room before a concert can be difficult to process for those who are neurodiverse. Alex and Helen have learnt to take time for themselves before going onstage. In this alone time they practice small physical exercises, breathing exercises, and they run through the main musical/dramatic aims they hope to achieve for the oncoming

performance. Not dissimilar from visualisation, this alone time allows them the chance to focus which results in a better concert experience overall.

Post-gig

For those who suffer with distorted self-image, paranoia and insecurity, post-performance can be a nerve-wracking time as you worry that you haven’t lived up to people’s expectations. Alex and Helen recommend trying not to critique yourself until you’ve seen or heard a recording of the show. There’s no doubt that in this industry how we feel on stage and what people actually see and hear are two wildly different things. 

SOCIAL SETTINGS

Take a breath

For those with social anxiety, the various social engagements one is required to attend as a singer can be challenging. Alex recommends taking a moment for yourself before entering such an event, and asking how it is you wish to present yourself? In taking a moment you offer yourself the mental clarity to decide how you wish to behave.

Episode edited & produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alex and Helen were delighted to sit down with new media artist, composer and pianist Larkhall to talk about his latest album: Say You’re With Me.

Written during the arrival of his second son when Larkhall realised he was suffering from depression, Say You’re With Me explores his journey of understanding and caring for his mental health. From moments of meditative stillness to joyful exuberant climaxes, the album takes us through many of the emotions we experience in our every day lives.

In this episode Alex, Helen and Larkhall discuss caring for your mental wellbeing via exercise, meditation, medication and even micro-dosing. They talk about how often we hear the mental health stories which aren’t successful, or don’t have a happy ending; Larkhall feels his experience is different and is equally important to share. The trio chat about how the new album came to fruition, how Larkhall composes and how he has built a computer system that develops visuals which react in real-time to his compositions. In his live gigs, Larkhall combines his post-classical style with these design algorithms, creating vivid imagery which is unique to every performance.

Say You’re With Me is available on bandcamp, Larkhall’s website, and all major streaming platforms.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the final episode of our Mental Health Week Mini Series Alex and Helen talk about Distorted Self-Image and how they find ways to deal with this in their day to day lives.

Alex and Helen recognise Distorted Self-Image as not seeing things as they truly are. Oftentimes this can result in an intense over-criticism, not feeling anything is good enough and only seeing the negatives in our practice and performance. How can we combat this over-criticism?

• Make recordings. If we are in an over-critical headspace it can be helpful to make a recording of the lesson, coaching or performance, wait for one or two days to put some distance between yourself and the event, and then listen to it with a slightly more objective outlook.
• Trying to look at the bigger picture. Often we’ll feel frustrated because we haven’t managed to achieve every single thing we were aiming for in a concert or an audition, but it’s worth reminding ourselves that no audience or panel will know every tiny goal you set yourself. If the audience reaction to a performance is positive, recognise you must have done a lot of things right in order to get to that point!
• Encourage yourself to look for the positives. You may feel that the positives are hard to find, but it can be good to do as a reminder that no event is a total catastrophe.

A common product of Distorted Self-Image is distorting feedback. Alex and Helen will regularly search for the veiled criticisms behind any comment or compliment. What are the ways we can tackle distorting feedback?

• Take what is being said to you at face value. Once again this is a place where recording performances, coachings and lessons can be extremely helpful. If you are complimented after a performance, take the compliment. If you are given constructive feedback in a coaching, take the feedback as it is delivered.
• Consider who you need feedback from/whether you need feedback. If you’re unsure about what has been said to you, can you take it and discuss it with your artistic team who you know well and who you trust?
• When it comes to feedback: take what serves you, leave what doesn’t.

Alex and Helen recognise that is a freelance career is precarious and oftentimes they’ll enter into a work setting desperate to show that they’re competent, committed and completely on their A game. This can result in an almost chaotic energy that leads to them being completely burnt out in the long run. How can we counter that unhealthy social approach?

• Caring less about what others think. This is a big problem that can feed into a lot of mental health issues, but it is something which influences how we behave in work or social setting. On many occasions it is the singers that are sure of themselves and confident in their abilities that come across the most relaxed and easy to work with. (We know this is not an easy one!)
• Taking a two-minute time out. Whether it be before a rehearsal, or in the middle of a social engagement, it can be good to take two minutes to collect yourself and consider how you want to approach the event.
• Reminding yourself that people almost always aren’t thinking about you. In relation to our first point - we’re often so concerned about what others think, but most of the time they’re not thinking about us, they’re thinking about themselves.

If you feel Distorted Self Image is something you are coping with and you want to talk about it, please do feel free to get in touch. We are always here to listen.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In Day 4 of our Mental Health Week Mini Series we’re joined by soprano Helen Lacey who tells us about her experience of moving to London after finishing her undergraduate degree at the Royal Northern College of Music.

We discuss leaving conservatoire and the challenge of managing your own time. We talk about breaking into a new work and social dynamic, finding your feet in a city you don’t know as well as finding yourself both personally and professionally. Helen reflects on moving to London, how she coped with the size, pace and scale of the city, and also how the pandemic changed her relationship to her local area.

We also talk about mental health in the classical music industry, how it’s good to see high-profile figures such as Allan Clayton talking about the difficulties of the work (Panic attacks and poor pay: Allan Clayton on the real life of an opera star), yet how we still need to see this openness and honesty filter into our daily practice. As a singer, Helen talks about the way mental health undoubtedly impacts the voice and how, if we don’t care for our mental wellbeing, it can become a vicious cycle.

Helen shares the greatest thing she’s learnt in recent months: we have to tend to all parts of ourselves in order to be able to perform at our best. There has to be a balance.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On Day 3 of this Mental Health Week Mini Series Alex and Helen discuss depression and three ways they find depression exhibits itself in their lives.

Alex and Helen recognise that as two people that are often quite goal-focussed and driven, it can be scary to be in a period of depression when there is no desire to do anything. How can we handle this lack of motivation?

• Self-acceptance and self-recognition. Alex and Helen encourage you to recognise the place and space you’re in and to try to accept it.
• Tell someone. In sharing, you open yourself up to finding guidance and support. If you don’t feel able to tell someone, step one can often be to write it down with the aim of working towards speaking to someone you trust.
• Readjust your goals. Perhaps your goals for the day might be going for a walk, cooking yourself a good meal and getting a good night’s sleep. These things allow us to maintain some kind of basic self-care routine whilst dealing with these difficult emotions.

Alex and Helen are both aware that they have used a number of unhelpful coping methods to ignore their depression, including staying busy to ignore their emotions, substance abuse in the form of alcohol, and self blame.

How can we handle depression differently?

• Recognising when your diary is unhealthily busy and combatting that by trying to carve out time for yourself in order to face the emotions you’re attempting to run away from. It may be uncomfortable at first, but if you sit with your emotions and acknowledge them you’re a step closer to handling them.
• Listening to your body. Whether it’s craving sleep, a certain meal, sunshine or a hug, in listening to your body you give yourself the chance to understand what you actually need.
• Talking to someone. Alex and Helen discussed this in yesterday’s episode with Quintin Beer but they couldn’t recommend therapy highly enough.

In a world now dominated by social media it is easier than ever to make unhealthy comparisons about ourselves. This can feel far worse during a period of depression. How can we approach unhealthy comparisons?

• Take time out from social media. Often some of the worst comparisons come from a two-minute scroll on Instagram. It can be helpful to take a break from these platforms during a blue period to allow yourself the time and energy to rebuild strength.
• Question these comparisons! Often we feel inadequate or jealous when we see something on social media, but if we question that thought many times we can find it to be baseless. Yes, this person might have a new job and you feel jealous, but - did you even apply for that job? Would it be possible for you to have that job? What great things have you done recently because you don’t have that job? Everyone’s journeys are different and we can’t all take the same career path in this industry.

If you feel like you are suffering from depression, please feel able to talk with us here on the podcast. We’d also recommend taking a look at Help Musicians resources on mental health in music, in particular their Music Minds Matter website, and as well as that there’s the British Association of Performing Arts Medicine which delivers health and wellbeing services for those in the performing arts.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today Helen and Alex are joined by Quintin Beer to discuss Inner Calm, in particular through the methods of Meditation, Nature and Therapy.

Quintin talks openly about not necessarily searching for calm, but instead attempting to achieve a state of balance. Helen and Quintin talk about how they take medication to manage their anxiety and how they find it beneficial to stabilise the extremes of the condition.

Quintin began meditating in January 2020 through a mantra-based practice course recommended by a mutual friend. In the first lockdown he meditated for twenty minutes twice a day and admits that he has lapsed a little in recent months. He tells us how the more one meditates, the easier he finds it to achieve a sense of calm within the practice.

He tells us that he can find meditation difficult so on a daily level if he needs to find calm he’ll opt for a quiet night in where he turns off his digital devices, tidies the flat and reads.

Helen shares how in 2015 she first started meditating through the HeadSpace app, and after HeadSpace she moved to Insight Timer, a free directory of meditations. Helen now practices Shakra meditations, in particular she likes how the Shakra meditations require us to listen to our bodies and what they’re saying, as opposed to doing something that is so directly thought and emotion led.

Interestingly, both Quintin and Alex discuss how they find nature slightly overwhelming, in particular the size of the sea and the stars. Alex would much rather walk through a beautiful city as opposed to the countryside. He does enjoy the sound of the sea, and finds it calming to synchronise his breath with the waves.

Helen shares how for her, being a part of nature makes her feel calmer. Whether it’s a walk in the countryside, an exploration in a forest or some time by the coast, all of these experiences have a positive effect for her. She finds something settling about being reminded that she’s just a tiny part of this big big planet.

Quintin shares how he loves the combination of meditation and therapy. On many occasions he finds that issues will come up during a meditation practice, after which he will consider whether to raise them in a therapy session.

Quintin started with Relate, after which he went to the counselling service at the Royal Academy of Music and now he has weekly therapy sessions which he’s done for the last 2 years. Quintin describes therapy as the best form of self care.

Alex and Helen discuss how important it is to have a good relationship with your therapist and how it’s crucial that there’s trust present. Helen feels that for her therapy is one of the places we gain self-knowledge which is so important for each and every one of us as we go through our lives.

Quintin and Helen strongly advocate therapy for all. As Quintin says, you don’t need to be in crisis to go to therapy.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For Day 1 of their Mental Health Week Mini Series Alex and Helen tackle the topic of Anxiety. As two anxious people, they discuss how anxiety exhibits itself most commonly in their lives and how they try to handle it.

For both of us over-practicing is a common way our anxiety exhibits itself. We always feel like there’s more to do, meaning we practice more than is healthy and do ourselves damage in the long run. How do we combat over-practicing?

• Be strict. Set yourself time limits, trust that the practice session you’ve done has been beneficial and remember how crucial rest is.
• Set boundaries within the practice. For example, today’s practice session is on coloratura in one specific piece. If you see something else that needs to be worked on, write it down and know that you will address it in another practice session in the future.
• Not all practice needs to be singing out loud. Preparing scores, reading libretti, and mental practice sessions are all excellent ways of honing your craft without pushing your voice past its limits.

Our anxiety means that when we take to the stage we’re so desperate for people to feel the emotions of our character and we’re so desperate to know that we’re doing a good job that our bodies are a total ball of tension. How do we combat this tendency to over-try and over-perform?

• Alex’s teacher reminds him that our job is to invite people into our world, not to push out into their world. It is not easy but it requires us to not care about the audience reaction.
• Alex schedules moments of reflection and relaxation in arias and pieces to try and stop himself from embodying so much tension. Helen adds to this that it’s crucial to practice these moments of relaxation in order to build trust and security, it’s not something you can only attempt in a performance.

Anxiety can result in us finding social situations rather stressful and rapidly over-thinking, in particular in relation to rehearsal experiences. We can often quite quickly misinterpret comments and feedback, looking as quickly as possible for any underlying criticism in order to combat it. How do we deal with this over-thinking?

• For Helen, meditation is a great tool to combat anxiety. For Alex, yoga offers a similar release. Both practices have the opportunity to connect to the breath, taking you out of your brain and into your body.
• Helen suggests talking to herself like she would to a friend, recommending perhaps some gentle exercise, doing something she enjoys, or having an early night.
• Helen and Alex also talk about how important it is to share. Although Alex finds it hard to share, they both know that when they say their anxious thoughts out loud, they feel more able to recognise their anxious thought patterns and see things as they actually are.

Helen and Alex want to remind you that you’re not alone.

If you feel you’re suffering with Anxiety and you’re not sure where to turn, please feel free to talk to us here on the podcast. We’re here to help. We also highly recommend considering sharing such thoughts with close friends and family. If you don’t feel able to just yet, we suggest writing down some of the thoughts and concerns you’re having as a first step with the aim to building up to speaking to someone you trust. Later this week Alex and Helen will talk about therapy and medication, two additional methods to help treat the effects of anxiety.

Episode edited and produced by Daisy Grant Productions.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.