It feels good to receive an apology, and it can be such a tempting relief to leave it at that — especially when asking for what we needed or sharing what hurt us was already so hard to do. But it's actions that make the real impact and demonstrate meaningful care. You've heard the idea that we teach people how to treat us? In part, this is what that means: we teach people if apologies are sufficient, or if changed behaviour is also needed. In today's episode, we talk about integrity between words and action — in our relationships and in ourselves.

More of what we talked about:

01:17 Self-Connection Practice

03:11 Healing ourselves through welcoming our big feelings and offering ourselves gentle holding

04:36 Honouring our own feelings and needs by changing the dance with our loved ones

10:00 Word apologies are useless without aligned actions 

17:44 How are you teaching people to treat you

24:32 Having the courage to honor what you actually want and the value of letting others see your authentic experience

29:49 Honoring someone else’s no and being delighted for others that they value their own needs

34:30 Self-Connection Practice

*****

We all face discomfort when we need to make a change: the discomfort of staying the same, staying where we are, staying with what we know — and the discomfort of moving towards newness, unfamiliarity, and patterns of behaviour that aren't yet natural for us. We need to remember what we're doing and why we're doing it — and keep connected with the question "What is this discomfort in service of?"

Clean pain is the discomfort of moving toward healthier, truer unfamiliarity — in service of your personal and spiritual growth. Dirty pain is the discomfort of staying where we no longer want or ought to be — in service of feelings of safety or comfort or ease. Baby steps are a clean way to start moving toward the types of safety and ease that also serve your person and spirit.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

Most of us were raised on pressure to perform and shame about getting things "wrong" — all while we're meant to be learning and discovering everything about ourselves and the world we live in. Gentle parenting, and compassionate re-parenting, is the way we're going (with ourselves and our children), and we're seeing powerful results. Today's conversation is about building skills in these areas for our families and our own inner children/adolescents.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

Have you ever felt stupid? Like you should have known and you didn't, or like someone THOUGHT you should have known and you didn't, or you said the "wrong" thing? (We know you have, and we have too.)

Oof, what a feeling! The rush of fear, the flush of shame, the desire to run and hide or lash out and defend. We all know these feelings, and we all have our ways of coping -- some healthier than others. Our cultural understanding, our family system, our current circumstances all serve to inform our beliefs and behaviours in response to these feelings, and today we talk about it all, and offer some self-soothing and -reflection tools to help you manage these realities for yourself.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

Serenity to accept the things we can't change, and wisdom to know the difference -- this is what we're talking about here today, along with tools and perspective to help you connect with that awareness and (eventual) serenity. In this episode, G employs an example of one of her kids and a mac & cheese tantrum to illustrate our varying responses to the anger we express when we hit a wall of impossibility, and we discuss ways to honour those parts, our other parts, and the bigger picture.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

There's no way around it -- if you're alive, you're going to regret a decision at some point. You're going to second-guess yourself, you're going to be miserable, and you're going to laugh and feel free and have a wonderful time. You're going to love people, and miss people, and wish you could split yourself into pieces so you could be everywhere all at once.

In today's episode, we make some space for that with caller Aleksandra, who's recently moved abroad and is feeling all the ways we feel when we miss our people AND we're happy for distance, when we worry we've made all the wrong choices and that we'll end up destitute, when we don't know what to do next or how to find our footing.

And we come to a place of remembrance for the WHYs and the YESSES that got us to where we are today, and a place of purpose for the yesses we want to offer tomorrow.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

The ways we behave show us our truest values -- and they're not always aligned with what we think we believe. Most of the time, we're living on auto-pilot, slogging through an unexamined life just trying to feel good or safe day to day. But when we bring focus and attention to the ways we feel, the ways we spend our time, and the areas we tend to give our energy to, it can be eye-opening!

With new awareness, we can see the patterns we act out on a daily basis and the impact that has on our life and relationships -- and we can take charge. Even baby steps (maybe especially baby steps) are important steps to take toward shifting your life in ways that represent how you want to experience life. In today's episode we get radically honest about how we've been totally disconnected from our values in the past, how that's played out in relationships, and what steps we've taken to make values-based living a regular practice across the many areas of our lives.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

We hear a lot of people using this term "High Value" as a qualifier when talking about their behavior, or a potential date or partner's behavior -- but what does it really mean? High Value isn't a set of words, or any specific response; it's the embodiment of self-honouring, and honouring our values outwardly in our speech, energy, words and actions. Which is easier said than done -- especially if we've spent a lifetime hiding from who we really are, and who we're afraid we are, and what we want for our lives.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

We all have ups and downs in our relationships -- and some times are more intimate than others. There are many paths to intimacy, and intimacy means different things at different times. In today's episode, a listener seeks support around blocks to s*xual intimacy in her long-term relationship. This is an episode in two parts: in part one we explore and reframe relationship challenges, and in part two we talk about solutions and healthy, connected ways to explore these challenges for ourselves.

If you want support for yourself or your relationship, you can join our call-in shows too! Follow us on instagram for call-in announcements @wholeheartedloving.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.

We all have ups and downs in our relationships -- and some times are more intimate than others. There are many paths to intimacy, and intimacy means different things at different times. In today's episode, a listener seeks support around blocks to s*xual intimacy in her long-term relationship. This is an episode in two parts: in part one we explore and reframe relationship challenges, and in part two we talk about solutions and healthy, connected ways to explore these challenges for ourselves.

If you want support for yourself or your relationship, you can join our call-in shows too! Follow us on instagram for call-in announcements @wholeheartedloving.

More of what we talked about:

**************

Every episode comes with prompts for journaling and reflection. You can find these, submit your Qs and topic ideas, and learn more about Georgianna and Steph at http://wholeheartedloving.com.