The Desire Gap: Real Solutions for Mismatched Libidos

Why "love should be effortless" is ruining your relationship


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You've been sold a lie: that if your relationship needs work, something is fundamentally wrong. That love should just happen naturally if you're compatible. That needing help means you're failing.

This myth keeps people stuck in mediocre relationships, avoiding problems, and thinking they're failures when they struggle. And it's complete bullshit.

Here's the truth: We live in a culture that gives us terrible relationship advice, no real education about intimacy, and a bunch of harmful myths. Then we're expected to navigate one of the most complex, vulnerable aspects of human experience—intimate relationships—with zero guidance. Does that make sense?

Your relationship quality is the biggest predictor of your overall happiness and health—not your job, your bank account, or your body size. We invest thousands in gym memberships, career development, and lawn care. But when it comes to our most important relationship, we hesitate. Why?

This episode is about what "doing the work" actually means: time, money, effort, and attention. It's about why your intimate relationship deserves the same intentionality you give to other important areas of your life. And it's about giving yourself permission to get help before things become a crisis.

Your relationship deserves your best effort, not your leftovers. Let's talk about what real investment looks like—and why it matters.

Send a text

Get my free guide: 5 Steps to Start Solving Desire Differences
(Without Blame or Shame),
A Practical Starting Point for Individuals and Couples, at https://laurajurgens.com/libido

Find out more about my offerings and read the blog: https://laurajurgens.com/


Copyright notice: All content in this podcast is copyrighted and copying, scraping, data mining, or using the content to train AI is prohibited.

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The Desire Gap: Real Solutions for Mismatched LibidosBy Laura Jurgens, Ph.D.

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