2 Chainz canned five managers after his Atlanta tapas joined scored abysmally on its health inspection, scoring a pretty grotesque 59 out of 100. From TMZ: Sources close to the rapper tell us he immediately hired new bosses at Escobar Restaurant and Tapas — all of whom have at least 5 years restaurant experience. We’re told Chainz made the quick change on the heels of the joint scoring 59 out of 100 last week with the Georgia Department of Public Health.

Rachel Dolezal, the notorious white lady who spent years pretending to be black, is having a rough time. In an interview with the Guardian, she revealed that she’s unemployed and likely a month away from homelessness. Dolezal, you’ll recall, became a sensation after she struggled to answer a reporter’s question about her race—specifically, whether she was, in fact, African American.

Since reading Anna Hezel’s essay about West Elm’s Peggy couch on The Awl last week, it’s been eating at my brain like a deadly lake-dwelling amoeba with a lengthy incubation period, or a weeks-long headache you ignore because you don’t want the doctor to tell you it’s cancer. Anna bought the Peggy sofa and hated it. I bought the Peggy sofa and think it’s fine.

Mariah Carey is a real person. She is a sentient human woman with a fully functioning body and mind. She can move around in physical space with relative ease. She can express herself through song and non-verbal communication. She feels love. She feels loss. She knows her. She doesn’t know her. She lives on the same planet (Earth) where you and I reside. But even though Mariah Carey is one of us (by which I mean she’s human), she does not live in the “real world” you and I inhabit.

After what looked like a delightful weekend in New Orleans with her parents, memes of young Blue Ivy have been circulating showing her staring down from a balcony at all the people who are not part of the Carter family. The gist of most of the jokes is Blue Ivy’s fictional contempt for the non-multi-millionaires non-Beyoncé-DNA-sharing muggles.

Disney has been baiting us for some time now with promotional photographs and trailers in order to whet our appetites for the live-action Beauty and the Beast. Now we have a clip of Emma Watson—Belle—singing the opening song by the same name. You know the one: Belle talks shit about her “poor, provincial town” and everyone says “Bonjour” to each other. It seems, however, that the dialogue has been modified.

A guy who looks literally nothing like Sisqó made his way into several high-profile fashion week events, because people assumed he was Sisqó. This is sort of like how people think every bald white guy with glasses is Moby, except probably more racist. From Page Six: The fake Sisqó sat front row at the Philipp Plein and Vivienne Tam shows — where he sported a black velvet, gold-trimmed, caftan-style Versace suit, a torrent of chunky jewelry and shades.

I’ve had to remind myself, as I scroll through these photos of some teens at an under-18 nightclub who have all adopted the same bizarre, inscrutable pose, that teens are not known for graceful control over their body. We’ve all been here, at one time, I think. A hand placed smack dab in the middle of the face, head on to the camera. Yes: that’s the look. The shots were taken at something called Epic_Under18s, which sounds like a website that should be investigated by the FBI.

It’s been nearly a year since the release of the critical disaster that was Batman v. Superman, and most chatter about the upcoming standalone Batman movie—the one that’s supposed to star Ben Affleck—has died down. But it’s not because Affleck is trying to mend his relationship with Jennifer Garner or add some more flames to his phoenix tattoo! Much like the real Batman (you know, the sad sack Christian Bale one), Affleck no longer wants to be Batman.

Since its founding in 1986, American Girl has focused its energies on “fueling connection among girls and helping them to unleash their full potential.” But of the over 29 million American Girl dolls that have been sold in the past 31 years, I’ve personally identified with exactly zero. I felt left out and woefully unimportant. Until now.