Chelsea Manning, whose prison sentence will conclude this May after President Obama commuted her sentence in one of his final monumental acts in office, has published a heartfelt, hopeful open letter in The Guardian, crediting her fellow prisoners for helping her through her time served.

Everyone’s been desperate for another glimpse of Stranger Things icon Barb, and though she is almost definitely gone for good, the actress who played her, Shannon Purser, still lives. On Thursday’s episode of Riverdale, Purser took on the role of yet another awkward nerd, Miss Ethel Muggs. Ethel is a character from the original Archie comic canon, best known for trying to break into Jughead’s asexual heart with lots of home cooking.

Though every day in 2017 feels like a week, it has only been four days since Kellyanne Conway, Donald Trump’s flaxen-haired special adviser, showed her ass on national television by fabricating the “Bowling Green Massacre,” an event that did not happen, in order to justify the president’s Muslim ban. And now, she would like you to know that she’s sorry. Truly. She is!! Ugh.

Doing press for Fifty Shades Darker, Marcia Gay Harden—who stars in the Fifty Shades of Grey sequel as the mother of angsty sex boy Christian Grey—was reportedly banned by the film’s PR team from getting too raunchy in promotional interviews. Uhh, pardonnez-moi, but if a film is bold enough to name a character “Jack Hyde” (are you freaking kidding me, E.L.

Last October, Johnny Depp made plenty of industry headlines when news broke that he was leaving UTA, his agency of nearly 30 years, for CAA. Then story sort of came and went, as people cared more about his relationship with the woman who accused him of domestic violence than they did about who his agent was. Understandable! But Page Six reports this week that the move may have had larger implications than originally thought.

Rob Lowe went on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Wednesday night to promote whatever that show he’s currently on is, and the conversation eventually turned to that very funnyjob listing TMZ published earlier this week. Remember? It said his assistants should “never assume anything,” have a massage or Jacuzzi ready if needed, and be able to lift 25 pounds. While Lowe admits that he is looking for an assistant, he denied the listing was his.

Did you really think there was some chance that Beyoncé would let two little freeloaders growing inside her womb keep her performing at Coachella? If so, you clearly have not met Beyoncé. (...have you met Beyoncé? What does she smell like? I bet she smells like a rare orchid.) This is a woman who didn’t even flinch when an earring was brutally torn from her ear lobe by her own traitorous hair.

Following an ongoing boycott campaign spearheaded by anti-Trump group Grab Your Wallet, Nordstrom will no longer sell the work blouses and power heels made by Ivanka Trump’s eponymous brand. The Washington Post reports that the retailer confirmed as such in an official statement from a company spokesman, attributing the decision to poor sales. From the Post: “Each year we cut about 10% [of brands] and refresh our assortment with about the same amount,” the statement said.

The photo above is of Scott Disick lounging beside some anonymous woman in Miami. He looks sunburned, which worries me. Scott! Wear some SPF 50! And don’t forget to re-apply every 90 minutes! But I’m losing focus. The reason Scott is suddenly in Miami and not with the Kardashians in Costa Rica, where he was photographed just days ago, is because he did a dumb thing.

A judge has denied Sherri Shepard’s ex husband Lamar Sally’s request for an increase in child support payments —a tiny victory for Shepard in what has been a legally complicated and strange child support case, ongoing since 2015. The child in question was conceived by surrogate, using Sally’s sperm and a surrogate’s egg, so Shepard has no biological relation to the child, who has been raised by Sally since August 2014, shortly after the couple split.