Worst Foot Forward

Worst Foot Forward

By Hosted by Ben Van der Velde and Barry McStayComedyHistory
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Worst Foot Forward episodes

  • Ep 62: Tez Ilyas - World's Worst Centre Back

    It's back to one of our favourite Sunday afternoon pub conversations this week as we go searching for more terrible footballers for our all-time worst XI. This week, we fill the centre-back spot and there are a rogues gallery of misfits, cheats and actual criminals all jostling, badly, for the spot. Our guest is football fan, Blackburn Rovers fanatic and tremendous stand-up comic Tez Ilyas. We discover the story of the farcical Combination League - a precursor to the Football League in the 1880s which lasted less than a season, how and why the Madagascan champions lost 149-0 and who exactly was a "bastard's bastard" during the 1970s.

    Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @tezilyas @podnose Worst Foot Forward is part of Podnose: www.podnose.com

    1 hr 4 min
  • Ep 61: Stevyn Colgan - World's Worst Policeman

    Hullo hullo hullo...what have we got here then? Why officer, it's an episode all about the worst coppers of all time. We invited on QI elf, novelist, lateral thinker and ex-policeman with over 30 years service Stevyn Colgan to join us in settling the subject. As you'd expect, there's plenty of disreputable plods and dastardly inside jobs including brothels, speed cameras, three-card tricks, cross-dressing, lollipops and a very enthusiastic revolutionary. Have a listen and we're sure you'll agree it's a fair cop.

    Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @stevyncolgan @podnose Worst Foot Forward is part of Podnose: www.podnose.com

    1 hr 9 min
  • Ep 60: Spring Day - World's Worst Family Tradition

    We've a spring in our steps and a Spring in the studio this week as Brooklyn's sharpest wit Spring Day is with us to talk about the World's Worst Family Traditions. We mine the murky world of Reddit and our very own listeners for pranks and Stacks, we shove vicious insects into various items of clothing and we put so many babies in peril. So many babies… Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @springdaycomedy @podnose Worst Foot Forward is part of Podnose: www.podnose.com

    1 hr 5 min
  • Ep 59: Helen Arney - World's Worst Element

    It's time to get out our Bunsen Burners and boil everything down to its most basic constituent parts: if we can work out what the worst element in the world is, perhaps we can uncover the secrets behind all heroic failure? Joining us this week is breathtakingly smart and multi-talented chanteuse of the science world Helen Arney. Part of the Festival of the Spoken Nerd, Helen has appeared on TV and Radio as both a science communicator, madcap experimenter and dab hand with the ukulele. Together we navigate through the tricky quarries full of Kryptonite (all 22 varieties), sinister red mercury, dull old Boron and the phoenix-like astatine.

    Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @helenarney @FOTSN

    1 hr 13 min
  • Ep 58: Felix Trench - World's Worst Day

    It's a beautiful day! Our guest this week is the actor Felix Trench, star of the podcast sitcom 'Wooden Overcoats' (http://www.woodenovercoats.com) and history graduate who thumbs through the Worst Foot Chronicles to look for the World's Worst Day. There are quite a few to choose from… Felix gives us a worldwide tour of the year 1556, Ben harks back to the day the 20th Century began and Barry does a double-take as he discovers his calendar has a February the 30th. Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @felixtrench Worst Foot Forward is part of Podnose: www.podnose.com

    1 hr 1 min
  • Ep 57: Matt Stellingwerf - World's Worst Punishment

    We're joined this week by award-winning Kiwi comic and former criminologist Matt Stellingwerf to cover a seriously grisly topic: the world's worst punishment. This episode comes with a serious content warning as we delve into the depths of human behaviour to discuss capital punishments with the sort of inventiveness normally reserved for Wallace and Gromit. Our search takes us from medieval Spain to Enlightenment Sweden, with nods to Greek myths, Greek history and depressing American present. You'll learn a lot in here and hopefully come away not too depressed about the nature of humanity...

    Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @M_Stellingwerf @podnose

    1 hr 15 min
  • Episode 56b: The World's Worst 'Best Of 2017' Episode
    This week on Worst Foot Forward we are celebrating joining Podnose, the UK's leading independent entertainment podcasting network. To mark this, we're looking back over our first year (and a bit) of trivial silliness and awful achievements. We've picked out some of our favourite facts and fripperies from episodes 1 to 53, featuring some of our very best guests and very worst worsts, including understudy dogs, delicious seagull wine, Sexy Pac-Man and #goatballs. If you're a longtime listener or are tuning in for the very first time, this should give you a good idea of the sort of nonsense we peddle week in, week out. Wooden spoons at the ready? Dig in. Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @podnose Worst Foot Forward is part of Podnose: www.podnose.com
    37 min
  • Ep 56: Laura Lexx - World's Worst Tea

    Anyone for tea? Following on from speaking to the quintessential British rapper last week we cover the most classic of all British topics this week: tea. Joined by award-winning comedian and host of the CineMastermind podcast Laura Lexx we settle a debate that goes all the way back to the very first cuppa that was stewed a little too long and severely displeased a Chinese emperor. As well as getting very annoyed at Fortnum and Mason for the most expensively pretentious teabag on the planet we reveal tales of daring disguise by swashbuckling colonialists, the hitherto little known practice of tea duelling and the astonishing number of different digestive systems posh people like to have their tea leaves past through before they actually drink the stuff.

    Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @lauralexx @podnose

    1 hr 1 min
  • Ep 55: Professor Elemental - World's Worst Hip-Hop Album

    Pull up a turntable and join us as we cut through the hardy thickets of undergrowth that make up the choices of the world's worst hip-hop album. Joined by the indomitable Professor Elemental - the finest exponent of chap-hop and owner of the world's only monkey butler - we listen to music so asinine, offensive, badly produced and inappropriate that it should be banned by the Geneva Convention. All so you don't have to. On the way we discover the tragi-comic tale of Vanilla Ice, the potty-mouth Little Yachty and why hip-hop stars should never visit Stoke. Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @Prof_Elemental

    1 hr 11 min
  • Ep 54: Will Seaward - World's Worst Pirate

    Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of Cointreau, it's time for these salty seadogs to tell ye a tale! Gather ye round as Cap'n Will Seaward, comedian and storyteller of yore, is piped aboard the good ship Worst Foot Forward by Cabin Boy Van der Velde and Able Seaman McStay. Avast and away, they set sail in search of treasure, namely the World's Worst Pirates. But beware! For there be many dragons along the way, including a pirate monk, a man who it is said ate his enemies hearts and even the man who is the reason we wannabe pirates do be talkin' like this. Take comfort in stories of pirate gayness, hat-bandits and the origin of the word barbecue. AAAARRRRGGGHHH! Follow us on Twitter: @worstfoot @bazmcstay @benvandervelde @WillSeaward

    1 hr 3 min

About Worst Foot Forward

From the publisher's feed

An encyclopaedia of heroic failure