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We built this podcast for progressives who want to immigrate to Canada.  But then your child idiot president legally lost the election in November.  Joey Biden moved into the people's house and turned out to be much more progressive than we ever thought!  Who knew? 

Why would progressive want to leave the US now?  You got the keys to the candy store!  Well that's all fine and dandy but we still have a podcast to do here people.  So we rebranded. We would like to invite Republicans to immigrate to Canada's most conservative place, Alberta!  Where the right wings come with free health care!

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You will learn about Canada's two tiniest provinces, Prince Edward Island and Nova Scotia.  And bonus, you will also learn how to do the famous "Inhalation Affirmation".
Your life will be transformed!

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The 16th largest Island in the world is on the east coast of Canada.  And you can immigrate there, but before you do, you'll have to be "screeched in". This episode will explain it all. 

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What do you think the New Brunswick press called a doll house collecting, disco dancing, 'committed bachelor' premier in the 1970’s?  

Yep, they called him: “flamboyant”.  Richard Hatfield, former potato chip salesman, lawyer and chemist who ran the province for 17 years, is front and centre in a  story like no other. 

I’ll be at Studio 54 if you need to reach me. 

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We dive deep into Cali-anada,  the much discussed movement for California cede statehood with the  US and join Canada as our eleventh province.  Well, it is a ‘much discussed’ movement on this show, but, probably, nowhere else. 

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In Canada, we are a modest people and when huge international celebrity hits, it is very difficult to process with humility. I speak from personal experience:

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Over the past 20 years roughly 235,000 new immigrants arrive in Canada every year. The current Liberal government has upped immigration levels to 300,000 people per year.  Covid 19 isn't  helping them get to that number but the intent is there.  There’s a lot of criteria to get by the bureaucrat bouncer at the Canadian immigration rope line,   but if you’re between 18 and 54, language is an important factor for your approval.

To successfully immigrate to Canada, you have to speak and understand either English or French at what is called “Level 4”.  

With level 4 you could understand a grocery list, but perhaps not a doctoral thesis.   And may I just say,  that as a native English speaker,  I have fallen asleep reading a few doctoral thesis. 

Canadian is not as easy as you might think.  For example, do you have any idea what we call Beyonce's husband up here?  

This episode  will prepare you to speak Canadian. 

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This episode is about sex. Well, sex and love.  Because in Canada if you'renot in love, you don’t have sex. … We are a polite people.  I mean we don’t have casual sex in Canada, sex here is formal.  We fall in love, then we make love, that’s the way it rolls up here.

We also sometimes tell the truth in podcasts.  Sometimes.

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Up here in Canada, we’re not worried that someone will shoot us in a fit of road rage if we give 'em the finger after they cut us off while driving. We’re polite, we don’t give people the finger.  Road rage Canadian style is more …like this:

  “go…after you, no, no I insist, please, really, I couldn’t, go! you fuckin’ asshole!  

 In fact, our whole system of measurement is different than yours. And you’re going to love this, because if you weigh 145 pounds in American, cross the border with your landed immigrant card and boom you will be a mere 65.77 kilograms in Canadian…I can feel that fat melting away and those abs just a poppin’!  

 You will have to learn our system of measurement – it’s called metrication and it can lead to blindness and hair growing on your palms.  

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When you look at real estate listings in New York City you can find a crime profile of the neighbourhood. It’s a Google map and when you click on the crime icon, the areas in the hood that have criminal activity turn orange. It’s like the opposite of the “local amenities” listing. Instead of three pharmacies, a dry cleaner and a pet shop, you get two drunk and dis-orderlies, three B&E’s and a domestic.  

Since you are moving to Canada, The Yes We Canada Podcast is delighted to offer you the crime profile of your new neighbourhood, downtown Canada. 

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