You Better Plan On It Podcast!

Good evening All!

Every day, we see, read or learn about senseless deaths taking place at crosswalks in every state across America and around the world. You can especially see intense footage of such tragedies posted directly to social media. I mean, scenes that are hard to watch!

Now, we all know that crosswalks were put in place to protect our pedestrians. However, we have lunatic drivers out there that are in such a hurry and far too often ignore the crosswalk right of way, ultimately leading to some of the most tragic and violent deaths imaginable, especially when it involves our children.

As you listen to the story, you will learn about the unnecessary death of a young teenager caused by a driver in a hurry to beat the crosswalk right of way signal. The death is as tragic and brutal death as you can ever witness.

At the end of the day, I just want us to be more cognizant of our surroundings before we make the decision to negotiate a crosswalk area, especially for those of us with children. So with that said, parents and for anyone listening who knows of others who can use this important, life-saving plan, I issue you a challenge to first talk with your children and then implement my following 8-step Crosswalk Plan:

  1.  First and foremost, please have a conversation with your children about being extremely cautious before negotiating a crosswalk and even discussing fatality information with them, not to scare them but to inform them!

2.  Stress to them that it is very important to remove headphones, earbuds and get off their phones and pay attention to traffic before crossing.

3.  Talk to them about looking closely at whether there is a crosswalk signal to push. If so, push it, and then wait cautiously for at least a full 3-5 seconds before crossing to ensure that drivers know you have the right of way.

4.  If it is a non-signal crosswalk, if you see vehicles coming just pause in place, let drivers see that you intend to cross, make sure the vehicles come to a complete stop and then you cross.

5.  Drop the bad habit of running across the crosswalk just to beat the traffic because you are in a rush or you think it’s a fun game to outrun vehicles. 

6.  Drop the bad habit of talking on your phone with your head down and not looking out for danger while you cross. 

7.  Drop the bad habit of crossing over like you own the right of way and giving people mean-mug looks that can be taken the wrong way. 

8.  If you see our Elderly, Special Needs or someone struggling to make it across, take the time to assist them so that they have safe passage as well!   

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Hello All!

I want to take you into the world of Mentoring and the impact it can have on other people, especially our younger generation of people. I also offer a mentoring exercises for any adult who wishes to take in the challenge of mentoring someone between the ages of 13-25 years of age. I believe these are the ages that are the most difficult ages for a person to navigate life. It is that cross between finally becoming a teenager (13), learning to understand and negotiate more difficult obstacles and pressures along the way and on to moving into what should be a mature young adult life ahead (25).  

So what is the definition of Mentoring? Well, the primary purpose of mentoring is to facilitate the personal and professional growth of a less experienced individual (the mentee) by leveraging the knowledge, experience, and guidance of a more experienced person (the mentor).

In addition, there are 7 key roles involved in a Mentoring plan which include, providing guidance, giving constructive feedback, acting as a role model, helping set goals, facilitating networking, offering emotional support and holding the mentee accountable. 

Whether you are a parent, teacher or supervisor on the job, you are a mentor, at least to a degree, because there is always someone in your life that looks up to you because of who you are as a person, how you perform daily and how you navigate life as a leader. 

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Good evening Listeners!

Have you ever been told or ever realized that you look a lot like a particular person? Have you ever did the research on the person that you are said to look a lot alike to see what type of person he or she is? I mean, think about it, do you ever think that your look alike, especially someone you are unfamiliar with, is a bad person who has a lot of enemies? 

The reality of the matter is that a look alike bad person with an ugly reputation can cause you to be mistaken for him or her and put your life in danger. As you will see, this episode involves an incident because of mistaken identity that leaves the wrong person, a very good person, unalive while his look alike bad person lives on.

I, myself have been told for years that I look so much like Lawrence Taylor, the New York Giants Hall of Fame football star. I have been mistaken for Emmitt Smith, the Dallas Cowboys Hall of Fame football star. Now, I am aware of both of these gentlemen and I know a lot about them because I closely followed their careers, but I also took a look at their history outside of football and I have a lot of insight on their personal lives as well. So, if you have someone out there that you can easily pass for, at least do yourself a favor and find out about the history of the individual if you can because you never know when you can be mistaken for the wrong person and wind up injured or killed because of that person's bad reputation along with his or her enemies!     

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Good evening Listeners!

This episode has great meaning to me because it centers around the loss of life of a child who was someone's son, brother, nephew, cousin, godson and best friend The individual intentionally planned an early exit from Earth because of a world in which he was constantly bullied, belittled and frowned upon almost daily because he was considered too nerdy and he was much shorter and smaller than normal kids his age! 

On another note, I also want everyone to understand that the life of a child taken way too soon happens far too often in this country and around the world daily. We, as parents, guardians and adults must place greater emphasis on our children, especially in today’s complicated and dangerous world, so let’s be sure that we all do our parts in protecting the most precious resource ever given to Man and Woman, and that resource is, God’s Children!

If you know someone, or even know of someone who seems like they are in distress and might possibly hurt themselves, please have a conversation with them or someone who can help the matter. However, you must do so as soon as possible and not wait because you do not wish to rat the person out. We are too far into this world to leave situations that we are fully aware of unresolved, therefore waiting until the worst happens! I charge everyone to jump in feet first and help someone that you know is or even seems like they might be suicidal!

Additional Information: Factors Contributing to Suicide Risk

Individual Risk Factors

• Previous suicide attempt.
• History of depression and other mental illnesses.
• Serious illnesses such as chronic pain.
• Criminal/legal problems.
• Job/financial problems or loss.
• Impulsive or aggressive tendencies.
• Substance use.
• Current or prior history of adverse childhood experiences.
• Sense of hopelessness

Violence victimization and/or perpetration

Relationship Risk Factors

These harmful or hurtful experiences within relationships contribute to risk:

• Bullying
• Family/loved one's history of suicide
• Loss of relationships
• High conflict or violent relationships
• Social isolation

Community Risk Factors

These challenging issues within a person's community contribute to risk:

• Lack of access to healthcare
• Suicide cluster in the community
• Stress of acculturation
• Community violence
• Historical trauma
• Discrimination

Societal Risk Factors

These cultural and environmental factors within the larger society contribute to risk:

• Stigma associated with help-seeking and mental illness
• Easy access to lethal means of suicide among people at risk
• Unsafe media portrayals of suicide

 Additional Information: Circumstances that Protect against Suicide Risk

Individual Protective Factors

These personal factors protect against suicide risk:

• Effective coping and problem-solving skills
• Reasons for living (for example, family, friends, pets, etc.)
• Strong sense of cultural identity

Relationship Protective Factors

These healthy relationship experiences protect against suicide risk:

• Support from partners, friends, and family
• Feeling connected to others

Community Protective Factors

These supportive community experiences protect against suicide risk:

• Feeling connected to school, community, and other social institutions
• Availability of consistent and high quality physical and behavioral healthcare

Societal Protective Factors

These cultural and environmental factors within the larger society protect against suicide risk:

• Reduced access to lethal means of suicide among

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Good evening Listeners!

In this episode, I offer a challenge to you to plan an Adult Playdate for a Day with a friend that you know lives paycheck to paycheck or perhaps lives on a very tight budget, you know that person who could use a day away from the stresses like family, finances and medical matters. 

The goal here is to choose a friend that lives within a reasonable distance from you that you typically do not hang out with, and maybe you are not even that close, but you see them a lot and you chat with them enough that he or she is someone you would consider hanging out with.

Now, there are seven key objectives to the challenge for you to follow:

First, choose a friend who lives within a reasonable distance from you that you personally know doesn’t have a lot and could use a day away from worries, especially financial, medical or family stress. 

Second, reach out to that friend and tell him or her that you want to hang out for a day, but just the two of you (preferably male-to-male and female-to-female only hangouts).

Third, choose a date and time to meet, but I want you to go to that friend’s residence and pick them up. Be sure to give them a reasonable but not too crazy dress code so that they are comfortable and not worried about how to dress.

Fourth, before you meet, plan an inexpensive (or expensive if you prefer) but fun day in which you spoil that friend for the day. Because you know he or she needs it, make sure they pay for nothing and do not let them. Allow them to be free from obligation while you handle everything. Just make sure that they know that you got them covered. 

Five, make it a day, let’s say from 11am – 6pm. This should be reasonable enough time to have breakfast or brunch, do whatever you do in between, have an early dinner and then get the friend back home by 6pm. 

Six, once they are home, give that friend a big hug and tell them you hope they enjoyed their day and that you thought about them and just wanted to give them a break and some time to enjoy a day without stress!

Seven (optional), tell them you’d like to do this again but as couples if they are married or as families if they have kids in the home. If it’s a couple’s thing then perhaps invite them on a nice outing. If it’s family’s thing then invite them over to your homes for perhaps an early dinner, with games to play for a couple of hours or so after dinner. 

Just so you know, I have no regrets for what I did for a friend that you learned about in the story. It was worth it, so please take on this challenge, enjoy it with that person, as couples or with your families if you choose to make a multi-person function. Trust me, you will find that you have a friend or friends for life that will always be a blessing to you! 

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Evening Listeners!

Always pay close attention to the news media when imminent, life-threatening crises arise such as severe weather is on the horizon as I’m sure you do as well. Unfortunately, we still have families and individuals out there who disregard evacuation mandates, so I ask myself, well, how can it be called a mandate to evacuate for a particular area, but people are still allowed to stay. I understand there are those who would rather ride it out to protect what they have and take care of themselves no matter the risk, but the bottom line is when the word evacuate is given then why is it not 100% enforced? 

Well, after conducting my very own research, I learned that, yes, the United States has evacuation mandates issued by state and local governments for imminent, life-threatening situations such as hurricanes, floods, or fires, and these mandates are a serious public safety measure that individuals are expected to follow. Failure to comply can result in fines, arrest, or other penalties, and it also means you will not receive assistance from first responders if you remain in the affected area.

With that said, listen to the story about the well-compensated, arrogant, do as they please Tolsen Family and how disregarding a major evacuation mandate led to a critical authoritative decision made by Dad that cost the family a couple of cherished loved ones!    

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Good evening Listeners!

As we go roll into the Winter Season, are we truly prepared for inclement weather that is so severe that it becomes life-threatening to you and your families? Is there a strong possibility the area in which you currently live is susceptible to a major weather crisis that could leave you and your family stranded for a period of time before Emergency Services aid can get to you? Have you taken the time to look at your area and devise a plan that gives you the best chance to survive a major weather crisis, or at least give you the time to get you and your families out of harm’s way in a timely manner? Do you have the necessary food, clothing, supplies and equipment to sustain you and your families in the event of a severe weather crisis that leaves you stranded for an unknown period of time?

These questions are asked because severe weather crisis for many families continually happen this way every year, but for some reason, the majority of families still do not have an adequate plan to combat such crises. At the end of the day, and in the sincerest of ways, I stand on the side of you and your families living a life that is as safe and secure as possible. I need and want you to know that I have all of you in my very best interest when I talk about having a Plan for any inclement occasion that can have a dire impact on your lives. Believe me, you are and always will be worth it to me!

Additional Information: 

Documented Inclement Weather Plans for Families and Individuals

• Prepare an emergency kit: Include essentials like water, non-perishable food, a flashlight, a phone charger or battery pack, and a first-aid kit. 
  
  
• Plan for travel: Pack extra supplies for your car or travel bag, such as a sweater, gloves, water, and high-energy food, to manage potential delays. 
  
  
• Stay informed: Monitor weather alerts and watches, as these are a warning to start making preparations for potentially severe weather. 
  
  
• Protect your home: Use dehumidifiers to control humidity levels, especially in basements, to prevent moisture-related damage. 
  
  
• Follow safety guidelines: When thunderstorms are imminent, stop outdoor activities and seek shelter, resuming only after the thunder has stopped for at least 30 minutes. 

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Good evening Listeners!

This episode gives you a look into the Butler Family, which consists of 35-year-old Dad, 33-year-old Mom, 10-year-old Son #1, 8-year-old Son #2 and 6-year-old Daughter. They live in a small single-story, 3-bedroom, 2-bath home just outside the projects on the South Side of Chicago. The area is not the best one to live in, and the family lives with the reality of shots fired and sirens going off on a daily basis, but the Butlers make it work by following a strict daily plan Dad and Mom have put into action to keep the family as safe and secure as possible.

Mom, who works at the hair salon just in the downtown area has a male friend who is also married with children and they have planned to leave their respective families and run off together. Although Dad has met him multiple times, he is unaware that Mom is having an affair with this particular gentleman who just happens to be the attorney they hired to implement a trust, will and power of attorney for the family. 

The turning point in the matter is Mom's friend learns that his wife has come into a substantial inheritance, so he meets with her to let her know that he has changed his mind about leaving his family so the relationship is over. On the flip side, Mom, who is supposedly unable to bare children anymore, tells him that they are pregnant and that she will expose him if he tries to leave her, which violently infuriates him. For Mom, suddenly everything goes dark, she goes missing, the police & family search frantically for her, finally locate her badly beaten, abused and unalive body. In the end, however, that sudden darkness that came over Mom is one in which she will never see the light of day again!   

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Good evening Listeners!

I want you to think carefully about your families and how easy it is to go from a life filled with love and joy to a life filled with a loved one gone forever, especially a child! Parents, if you have a child or loved one that comes home from work, school or other events after dark, communicate with that individual to ensure you are notified as to what time they will be home! I know the person is most likely of age but know that an abduction when you least expect can occur at any given time!

Listen to this episode titled, " The Hart Family Tragedy - Abducted in Darkness" as it takes you into the life of a good family that loses their child to an abduction by someone she has know for years. On the flip side, it also defines a daughter is supposedly a model student, but turns out that she is a bully and pays the ultimate price for the life of someone she helped significantly ruin! 

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Good evening All!

Let me ask you some important questions… 1. Are you the type of person who knows when you are being followed or watched? 2. Are you the type of person who does not even realize when you are being followed or watched? 3. Are you the type of person who believes that you are rarely, if ever being followed or watched?  Or 4. Are you the type of person who always feels like you are being followed or watched? 

I ask these questions I know you may not realize it, but we all really do fit into one of the 4 aforementioned categories. The question becomes, which characteristic are you honest enough to claim for yourself, and would you tell someone about it.

With these questions in mind, please take the time and opportunity to participate in "The Adult Travel Group Exercise" that you will hear in the episode and choose not only which type of person category you fall into but also see if you are someone who is a person that is more vigilant than you thought, if you are that person who pays some attention to your surroundings or if you are that person who is as carefree as they come!  

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