Most men don’t struggle with effort in relationships.

They struggle to receive love.

In this episode, we go beneath behaviour and unpack why emotional closeness can feel uncomfortable, overwhelming, or even unsafe - particularly for high-performing men.

This isn’t about communication techniques or trying harder.

It’s about identity, conditioning, and nervous system patterns that were formed long before you had language for them.

If you’ve ever found yourself pulling away, shutting down, or feeling disconnected despite “doing everything right,” this will give you a clearer lens on what’s actually happening.

3 Key Takeaways

• Why emotional closeness can feel unsafe — even when you want it
 • How early conditioning shapes your ability to receive love
 • Why this pattern affects not just relationships, but leadership and performance

This episode is not about fixing yourself.

It’s about understanding the pattern - so you can stop repeating it.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

There’s a version of you that only shows up in certain rooms.

And for most people… that room is family.

Nothing needs to be said. No conflict needs to happen. But the moment you step in, something shifts. Your body tightens.Your breath changes.

You become more guarded… more careful… less yourself.

In this episode, Nick unpacks what’s actually happening beneath that shift — not psychologically, but biologically.

Why your nervous system reverts to an older version of you.

Why you can understand the work… and still not be able to access it in those moments.

And why this pattern isn’t about weakness it’s about survival.

We explore the tension between attachment and authenticity, the role identities you learned to maintain connection, and the quiet “healing fantasy” that keeps this cycle repeating.

3 Takeaways

Your body is not reacting to the present  it’s remembering the past.

You don’t shift around family because of what’s happening now. You shift because your nervous system has already decided who you need to be to stay safe.

You learned to choose attachment over authenticity.

As a child, belonging wasn’t optional. So parts of you were suppressed to maintain connection and those patterns still run automatically today.

The work is not to change them - it’s to stay with yourself.

Freedom comes from shifting the goalpost. From needing deep understanding… to holding your own internal safety, regardless of who can meet you there.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

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Embodying Authenticity: The Peace of Being Who You Are

with Karis & Nicholas

After awareness and disruption comes embodiment -  the lived experience of truth.

In this final episode of the Authenticity Series, Karis and Nicholas explore what it feels like when the masks fall away and you finally start breathing as yourself.

They unpack the nervous system’s role in authentic living, the unlearning of false selves, and the practices that make truth feel like home again.

Expect grounded wisdom, poetic truth, and practical guidance for turning self-work into soul-anchored living.

Because peace isn’t something you chase — it’s what rises when you stop pretending.

Three Key Takeaways

1. Authenticity lives in the body, not the mind - When your nervous system feels safe, truth flows effortlessly.
2. Unlearning is liberation - Letting go of your survival identities makes space for your real self to breathe.
3. Peace is the reward - The more congruent you become, the more life aligns around your truth — in love, business, and legacy.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

Everyone loves the idea of being authentic—until it asks something of you.

In this episode, Nick and Karis dive into the real cost of authenticity: rejection, discomfort, and the vulnerability that comes with being truly seen.

They unpack how nervous system regulation shapes our ability to live and speak truth, why discernment is the quiet twin of authenticity, and how to navigate relationships when your growth triggers others.

Through lived examples, practical nervous system wisdom, and heartfelt reflection, they explore how to hold your truth without performance—and how peace becomes the ultimate payoff for courage.

Key Takeaways

1. Authenticity always costs something—approval, comfort, or predictability—but the price of pretending is higher.
2. True authenticity starts in the body. Regulation precedes discernment, and nervous system safety allows real expression.
3. You can’t be authentic without vulnerability. Stop performing for belonging and start expressing from calm truth, not chaos.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

In this opening episode of our three-part Authenticity Series, Nick and Karis dive into the hidden scripts we inherit from our families, culture, and ancestors. From epigenetics and generational trauma to people-pleasing, guilt, shame, and the inner critic — they uncover how much of what we carry was never truly ours to begin with.

This conversation blends personal stories, hard truths, and empowering insights from thinkers like Mark Wolynn, Gabor Maté, Florence Scovel Shinn, and Michael Neil. You’ll walk away with the awareness that while patterns may not have started with you, the power to end them — and to reclaim your authenticity — is in your hands.

Three Key Takeaways

- Inherited Scripts Shape Our Story

Trauma and beliefs can be passed down for generations, but they don’t define your destiny.

Ask yourself: Whose voice do I hear in my self-criticism — and is it really mine?

- Survival Strategies Aren’t Authenticity

People-pleasing, guilt, and negative self-talk may have protected you once, but they keep you from fully living now.

Ask yourself: What label was placed on me that I’m finally ready to release?

- Authenticity Is Unlearning, Not Improving

Coming back to your true self means peeling away false identities and rewriting the script of your life.

Ask yourself: What would authenticity look like if I wasn’t afraid of being the villain in someone else’s story?

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

Welcome back to The Frequency Podcast - where performance meets presence, and business becomes a spiritual practice. In today’s episode, Nick is joined by Gareth Were, father, founder of Pie Me Cafe Endenich , and a man who’s walked the path from burnout to embodied leadership.

Together, they explore the invisible weight many men carry -the need to prove, the trap of doing, and the often-unseen cost of success. Gareth shares how heartbreak cracked him open, how burnout became a portal to presence, and how self-awareness has become the compass guiding his leadership.

This conversation is a permission slip to feel deeply, lead consciously, and remember that your greatest power doesn’t come from performance—it comes from truth.

3 KEY TAKEAWAYS

1. Burnout is an initiation - When the body breaks down, the soul often breaks through. Gareth reframes burnout as a sacred turning point.
2. Your leadership is only as strong as your self-awareness - The more Gareth leaned into inner work, the more clarity he found in how he leads people, business, and self.
3. Doing “the work” means feeling what you’ve been avoiding - From breathwork to boundaries, somatic practices to stillness, Gareth maps the layers of healing men must walk to reclaim peace and presence.
   
   

Connect with Gareth - https://www.instagram.com/gareth.patterson.were/

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

In this powerful comeback episode of the Frequency Shift Podcast, Karis and Nick sit down to explore a hard but necessary truth — that many men today are stuck in a state of suspended adolescence.

They may look like adults on the outside — building businesses, raising families, ticking boxes — but beneath the surface, they’re still chasing comfort, avoiding responsibility, and outsourcing emotional leadership. The result? Burnout, broken trust, disconnection, and a deep sense of purposelessness.

This episode isn’t about shame. It’s about the rite of passage from boyhood to manhood — and what it means to initiate yourself in a culture that has forgotten how.

Whether you’re a man ready to rise or a partner who sees the man you love playing small — this conversation will give you language, clarity, and direction.

3 POWERFUL TAKEAWAYS:

1. Boyhood Behaviours Keep You Small — Even in a Big Life.
2. Addictions to porn, gaming, emotional outsourcing, and avoidance don’t just delay maturity — they rob men of power, clarity, and impact. True masculinity is forged in resistance, not comfort.
3. Initiation is a Choice — Not a Calendar Date.
4. Becoming a man isn’t something that happens at 18 or when you get a mortgage. It’s an intentional decision to take radical ownership, build internal structure, and lead from the inside out.
5. The Cost of Staying a Boy Is Far Greater Than the Discomfort of Growth.
6. When men avoid responsibility, it shows up in every domain: fractured relationships, a loss of trust, inner chaos, and women forced into masculine roles. The shift starts with you — and it starts now.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

Welcome back to Your Frequency Shift Podcast, the space where we delve into the depths of the human experience, uncovering the layers of what makes us who we are. I'm Karis, and joining me is my incredible husband and co-host, Nick. Today, we have a truly special guest—someone who has profoundly impacted Nick's life and inspires many through his journey of embracing vulnerability and redefining masculinity.

In Episode 25 of the Your Frequency Shift Podcast, we sit down with Michael Cooper to discuss the transformative power of vulnerability in the modern world. Michael shares personal insights from his journey, touching on:

• The misconception of vulnerability as weakness.
• How embracing vulnerability can redefine masculinity.
• The role of emotional alchemy in personal growth.
• Impact of vulnerability on relationships and parenting.
• Practical steps for men to begin accessing their vulnerability.

Key Discussion Points

The Power of Vulnerability

Michael delves into his personal journey of embracing vulnerability from a young age. Contrary to societal norms that often label vulnerability as weakness, he views it as a strength and a virtue.

• Early Realizations: Michael recalls, "I've always loved to the degree that I'm willing to wear my heart on my sleeve."
• Vulnerability as Expansion: He explains that vulnerability allows us to live in an expanded state, fostering growth and deeper connections.

Redefining Masculinity

We explore how traditional views of masculinity have limited men's ability to express emotions and be vulnerable.

• Societal Conditioning: Michael discusses how phrases like "boys don't cry" have shaped male behavior.
• The Modern Shift: There's a growing need to redefine masculinity to include emotional awareness and vulnerability.
• King Energy: True masculinity, or "king energy," embodies vulnerability and empathy.

Emotional Alchemy

Michael introduces the concept of emotional alchemy—transforming and handling emotions to lead to personal growth.

• Processing Emotions: "Emotion is energy in motion," Michael says. He emphasizes the importance of allowing emotions to flow rather than suppressing them.
• Practical Steps: He shares techniques for handling emotions, such as taking a moment to breathe and acknowledging feelings during heated moments.

Impact on Relationships and Parenting

The discussion highlights how embracing vulnerability improves relationships and parenting dynamics.

Connect with Michael Click Here

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

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Karis: @karis_topkin

In this compelling episode of the "Your Frequency Shift Podcast," we have the honor of hosting Mat Steinwede, Australia's leading real estate agent, devoted father of seven, and a true embodiment of transformation and resilience. Mat takes us on an unfiltered journey from his days of homelessness and addiction to becoming a visionary leader in the real estate industry.

Discover how a pivotal promise to himself ignited Mat's path to success. He delves into the core values that have shaped his life—honesty, discipline, and a relentless focus on what truly matters. Mat shares profound insights on energy management, emotional mastery, and the importance of designing your "10 out of 10" day to maximize your potential.

Tune in to learn how embracing authenticity and living a value-driven life can empower you to rewrite your own story and reach your optimum capabilities.

Three Key Takeaways:

1. Emotions Are Managed in the Moment: Mat emphasizes the importance of taking control of your emotions as they arise, leading to better relationships and personal well-being.
2. Focus on Being Great, Not Looking Great: Invest in personal growth and authenticity over superficial appearances to live a fulfilling life without unnecessary pressures.
3. Design Your "10 out of 10" Day: Intentionally structure your day around core values and priorities to maximize potential and achieve your goals.

Connect with Mat

For our listeners who want to learn more about Mat and his work, you can connect with him through the following links:

• Website: www.matsteinwede.com
• Instagram: @matsteinwede
• Facebook: Mat Steinwede Official
• YouTube: Mat Steinwede Channel
• Podcast: 31 Minutes

We hope this conversation has given you valuable insights into shifting your own frequency toward a more fulfilling life.

Ready to transform your life? Visit our website to explore our personal and corporate coaching programs and access valuable resources to start your journey today.

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

⚡ Discover where your energy is leaking → Take the Quiz

Private Coaching • Corporate Coaching • Retreats

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Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin

In this profound episode of the Frequency Shift Podcast, hosts Karis and Nick are joined by transformation coach Xavier Dagba for a deep dive into breaking generational cycles, embracing emotional awareness, and exploring racial reconciliation within ourselves. Xavier shares personal insights into healing, the role of self-compassion in transformation, and how our experiences shape our perceptions of others. This podcast took place back in 2019 yet still holds relevance in today's world.

Together, they shed light on the importance of emotional hygiene, spiritual courage, and creating inner unity to foster true change. This episode invites listeners on a journey toward self-discovery and holistic healing, combining the hosts' lived expertise in Human Design and life strategy with Xavier’s transformational perspective. Discover actionable tools to integrate healing practices into your life and relationships, and consider how inner work can shift your outer reality toward abundance, unity, and resilience.

3 Key Takeaways:

1. Embrace Emotional Hygiene - Xavier discusses the significance of emotional awareness and how "cleaning up" our emotions can lead to clearer, more empowering interactions.
2. Recognize Inner Unity - Discover practical ways to reconcile diverse aspects of yourself, acknowledging all parts to foster a balanced and compassionate outlook.
3. Harness the Power of Reflection - Practical exercises and Xavier's guidance encourage listeners to lean into self-reflection, bridging the gap between awareness and personal growth.
   
   

Connect with Xavier:

Emotional alchemist | Shadow worker | Wordsmith
Lead, love & Serve from your heart, not your wounds.

• https://www.xavierdagba.com/
• Instagram

Share your insights 😊

If something in this lands… stay with it.

And if this work has been part of your process, leaving a rating or sharing the episode helps it reach the people who are quietly sitting in the same place.

⚡ Discover where your energy is leaking → Take the Quiz

Private Coaching • Corporate Coaching • Retreats

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Connect with us on Instagram:

Nick: @vonpitt

Karis: @karis_topkin