Your Rad Reality

Season One, Episode Five 

It's Okay To Not Be Okay

This episode is a bit different as being an empath and realistically, a human... emotions can be overwhelming. Energy that you absorb from the world around you can get heavy and it can be difficult and heavy to live with them somedays. 

This past week and weekend, this happened to me in full force. And rather than fighting the heaviness like I used to, increasing burnout and the length of stay for the emotions, I have learned to be present with them. To sit with my emotions and feel them fully. 

Sometimes this looks like crying. I cry a lot. Sometimes it is a loud, dirty, obnoxious and messy cry that can take me off my feet. And that is okay. Crying is not a sign of weakness. It is a release of your emotions. A way for them to leave your body and that is healthy. Having releases is healthy. 

Sometimes it looks like not getting out of bed. Or not brushing your hair. Or not eating. Or over eating. Sometimes you break shit. Sometimes you yell. Whatever you need to do to feel your emotions and work through them... it is all okay.  

Do not judge yourself, and if others judge you, well that's a them problem. 

We live in a society that tells us to bottle emotions up. To not feel things, but we are human... that is what we do. We feel things. Deeply. But this society tells us to keep going, to always be busy and that if we aren't accomplishing anything we aren't worthy. This is total horseshit. 

I want to end the stigma of feeling like we have to be superhuman all the time. 

Because it is so okay to not be okay. The world can be heavy. Our minds can be dark places. We can feel sad, angry, lazy, etc... we feel these things because we are human. This is normal and feeling these things and doing whatever you need to do to survive the world, does not make you abnormal or unworthy.  

I do want to emphasize though that if your bad days outweigh your good or if you can't seem to pull yourself back up when you've fallen down.... 
It is okay to go talk to  professional. 
It is okay to take medications. 
It is okay to ask for and seek out help. 
There is nothing wrong with you. You are human and you are worthy of happiness.  

Because let me be straight with you here...
YOU CAN DO ALL THE THINGS:
eat healthy, exercise, sleep right, meditate, gratitude's, affirmations, etc.
AND YOU CAN STILL HAVE BAD DAYS. 

So feel all of the emotions in your life. Sit with them. Be present and feel them.
Do what you need to do to get through your bad days.
But then remember that there are other emotions to feel in the world as well. And go feel them too.
Embrace and enjoy your good days.
Give yourself some grace on your bad days.
Know and accept that you are worthy of it all.
And always remember that you are so loved.

*** I want to emphasize that I am no professional by any means, I just speak through my own experiences. But if you do need someone to talk to... my ears and heart are always open. I am a no judgement and safe space. *** 

Download your freebie at:
www.ali-rad.com/freebies
There will be some fun stuff coming up with this for March 1st!! Stay tuned. 

Music Credit:
www.audionautix.com

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

Season One, Episode Four 

Band-aid Friends 

Always remember that you are the most important person in your life. That being selfish is not a bad thing. It can be  depending on how you go about it. But you should take care of yourself first and foremost because you can't pour from an empty cup. 

Throughout my journey to live my best life, I have created the term Band-aid Friends.

This term began well before I used it. It began with my childhood of enjoying attention. I have always enjoyed attention; which I want to emphasize is not necessarily a bad thing. You need to be careful though when you are someone who enjoys attention to make sure that the energy and vibrations you are putting out into the world for everyone to respond to is not unhealthy. For me, into my adolescence, this enjoyment of attention quickly turned into me becoming  people pleaser. I found myself allowing people to walk all over me simply because I wanted their attention and I did not want them to dislike me

It wasn't until my hubby showed me that I did not have to accept these relationships in my life. I share  a personal story of how hubby demonstrated to me that I could remove someone who was very toxic in my life and while I understand many people may think he had no right to do that, I disagree. Because hubby did exactly what I was unable to do and see at the time because I was so engulfed in my people pleasing characteristics.

I learned I could remove myself from situations and that I had every right to remove toxic people from my life. So I am here to tell you, you are under NO obligation to keep ANY toxic person or relationship in your life. 

I know this is hard when you have such a big heart (which is a characteristic of a people pleaser and is a beautiful thing to be proud of). But remember that not every person is deserving of that big heart of yours.  

You don't have to live your life responsible for everyone's feelings and response to how you live your life. 

Please note I don't mean this gives you the right to be an asshole, but you get to live your life without worry of others response to your actions. 

So circling back to the term Band-aid Friends, I want you to think about when you wear a band-aid. Yes, it can help stop the blood of an injury, or help keep pathogens out; however when you wear it too long it destroys your skin. it does this because in order to heal properly, your skin needs to breathe.

If you think about this as a person, you can see how the same characteristics can apply.

I want you to evaluate the relationships in your life.
How do you feel in them?
Do you feel safe?
Can you be your most authentic self?
See how the people in your life respond with words and body language when you celebrate a win, or when you suffer a loss.

These questions will help you differentiate between the band-aid friends and the hydrogen peroxide friends.

The hydrogen peroxide friends are the friends that get into your deepest parts. They may sting you with some things they say, but it's because those things are exactly what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear.  But they will help get all the crap out of your life to help you breathe and heal properly. Because you deserve to heal properly. 

It hurts to rip a band-aid off. The adhesive can be so sticky that it pulls at hairs on the skin and just flat out hurts. Which is why some people end up keeping them on for even longer, or rip them off really fast. 

But if people aren't helping you be the best you and are toxic towards you... rip those band-aids off. 

Music Credit:
www.audionautix.com

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

Season One, Episode Three

Perfectionism Does Not Exist

Have you struggled with perfectionism?

I know I have struggled with perfectionism my entire life. I remember being a young child sneaking out of my room to add to projects, or study more, or to make things better for school. Even in my adult life, I find myself continuing to add on to things that I have already deemed complete.

But the reality is....
perfectionism does not exist.

I know, I was shocked too when I found this out.

But it is true. Perfectionism is something that us humans have created in our minds that acts as a barrier for us accomplishing the things we aspire to do. Perfectionism is usually created out of fear.

I know for myself, I was absolutely terrified and a full ball of anxiety about putting this podcast out into the real world. I had all of these thoughts relating to not having tech skills, who the heck was going to listen to anything I said... the "who do I think I am" attitude set in and I knew it wouldn't be perfect so I didn't think it was worthy of creating. I danced this dance with myself for well over a year. It wasn't until I listened to The Mindset Mentor Podcast with Rob Dial about perfectionism, where my thoughts began to shift. He spoke about progress over perfectionism. I thought about being a creative and realizing that how I get better with all of my skills surrounding my creative, was by actually doing them. This is more specifically through experience, trial and error and feedback. All of which don't happen if you don't put whatever it is you are creating out into the real word. Outside of your mind.

Perfectionism has us thinking thoughts of not releasing something into the world because it isn't good enough, but we get better by putting it out into the world. We get trapped in this vicious cycle. All over something that doesn't even exist.

We need to learn to be okay with the imperfections. To know how to set attainable and realistic goals for ourselves so that we are not reaching for something that is literally impossible to achieve. Because when you reach for something that doesn't exist, you let yourself down Every. Single. Time.

Remember that you are the creator. This means that you get to decide how everything plays out for yourself. For your life. For your creations. Which brings us back to the intention of this podcast... to inspire, empower and encourage people to create their own rad reality. For people to know that they are the creators. They are in control.

So if you are struggling with perfectionism and/or consider yourself  a "perfectionist," these are my tips for you to remember:

A) Perfectionism does not exist.
B) Progress over perfectionism.
C) Ask yourself why you created the perfectionism barrier?
*Hint: it is usually based around  fear of some kind.
D) You are the creator.

I did also want to add a note about perfectionism and body image.
It truly is a shame that we live in a society so cruel to try and convince humans that perfect is attainable. And even worse, try to make humans believe that if they are not perfect (something that doesn't exist), that they are less worthy. But I am here to remind you that your imperfections make you authentic and your authentic packaging is more important than any impossible ideology. Embrace your body. Love your body and the imperfect package that it comes in.

Download your freebie at:
www.ali-rad.com/freebies
There will be some fun stuff coming up with this for March 1st!! Stay tuned. 

Music Credit:
www.audionautix.com

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

Season One, Episode Two

Live Lighter – A Beginners Guide To Minimalism

If you have downloaded my freebie of “4 Weeks of Rad Living,” you would see that one of the tasks is to get rid of 7 items in your space.  I chose this as one of the tasks in the 4 weeks because when you remove items from your space and possession, the freeing feeling you get is astronomical. There is reason that decluttering your space reduces anxiety. https://cultureunbound.ep.liu.se/article/view/1021

While I am not one to ever pretend to be an expert on any type of lifestyle, dabbling into minimalism really has helped me. The feeling you get of shedding what doesn’t serve you is so freeing; literally like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. But instead, it could just be some clothes or trinkets causing the weight.

My story with minimalism actually began with seeing a medium about my mother that I lost at a young age. (*Sneak update: there will be an episode coming on this experience). This was not how I pictured beginning my journey with minimalism, especially considering my mother kept everything. But with the closure I received from seeing this medium, I was able to let go of so many belongings of my mothers.
Please note, that I will never tell someone how to grieve as the grieving process is different and unique to each person. I just touch base on my own personal experiences and what worked for me.

After this experience, I began being more aware of what I brought into my space and what I already had taking up space.  I was tested on this journey moving from a 4 bedroom house to a 37 foot sailboat. I really began to focus on wants vs. needs.

We live in a society that focusses on more this and more that. But I encourage you to sit with empty space. Evaluate your space, and your time. Empty is not always a bad thing. Remember that minimalism does not just apply to physical objects, it can be your time, your finances, etc. Sit with your life and see where your space is maybe too full. Start small though. Start with one item or one hour.  See how you feel right away, the next day, in a week and even in a year. And move at your own pace.

7 Tips That Help Me Live A More Minimalistic Lifestyle:

1. Be honest with yourself.
If you don’t use, wear or need it, get rid of it. 

2. Quality over Quantity. 
Be sure to purchase higher quality items so that you only have to purchase them once. 
This is good for minimalism, finances and the environment. 

3. Be okay with purging. 
Start with one and go from there. 

4. For clothes, turn your hangers around at the beginning of the month or year and every time you wear something, turn the hanger the other way. Evaluate at the end of that month or year and items on hangers the wrong way, donate ’em. 

5. If things are in boxes, and you have not used them since you moved, chances are you don’t need them. 
This obviously is dependent on how long you’ve lived there, if these items always stay in boxes, etc. 

6. Unsubscribe to email lists. 
Marketing is put in your face for a reason. It is easier to not want to purchase things when they are not constantly in your face. 

7. One in, one out rule. 
For every item (this can be similar items or different items) you bring in, one gets donated, gifted or chucked. 



Download your freebie at:
www.ali-rad.com/freebies 
There will be some fun stuff coming up with this in the next week stay tuned! 

Music Credit:
www.audionautix.com

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

Season One, Episode One

Who Are You?

So many people have no idea who they actually are. Or they have misconceptions on who they are. 

We are a society that deems so much importance on what we do for a living. This leads to people associating their whole identity on what they do for a living. But the important factor to realize is that what you do for a living is your career. Or a role you play. Just like some other roles such as: partner, sister, friend, mom, etc. These are not who you are. It is so easy to get wrapped up in  these roles that you identify yourself as them. But you need to remember that you are SO MUCH MORE  than those roles. 

"I want to be happy story" from a young child who, when asked what they wanted to be when they grew up wrote this while all of their classmates wrote professions. 

Do you really know what truly makes you happy? What makes you tick? What are your values? Your beliefs? What would you go to war over because you believe it into your core? 

We struggle to know these things as adults because as young children we are forced to plan our whole lives out at an age where some of us haven't even hit puberty. Why aren't we taught these things? Or how to be aware of them? Because having this knowledge of yourself makes making those decisions about your life so much easier. Not knowing these things are why we have an increase in mid life crisis, and divorces and why so many people work so many different jobs throughout their lives.  You may have all of the things that society has deemed important (example: partner, great job, house, children, etc.), yet still feel unfulfilled. This is probably because you maybe didn't want those things in the first place. 

If you are unsure of the questions above on who you are, I suggest starting with the things you enjoyed as a child. Take time for these things. Learn who you are. Gain the ability to describe yourself without the roles you play in your life. 

Challenge: 
Write what it would say beside your name in a dictionary. 
Share it with others and with me at:
https://www.instagram.com/mz.alirad/
https://www.instagram.com/your.rad.reality/

Download your freebie at:
www.ali-rad.com/freebies 
There will be some fun stuff coming up with this in the next week stay tuned! 

Music Credit: audionautix.com

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

I would like to welcome you to Your Rad Reality Podcast. A podcast dedicated to guiding you in the creation of your own authentic and joyful life. 

Coming to your speakers soon! 

Be sure to subscribe so you are all ready for launch day!

For more information, come say hello to me on Instagram at  @your.rad.reality or @mz.alirad

Cheers to dreams & wild things *

Ali Rad. xo



Music Credit: audionautix.com