Today's topic is something we've all experienced, but maybe more so during the holidays as we spend more time with distant relations: not seeing eye-to-eye with people—at work, at home, everywhere—and I wanted to share some ideas on what we can do about it. There's a worrying trend that all of the Big 5 personality traits are dropping, and especially agreeableness. That friction amongst us wrecks relationships, influence, and connection. In my eyes, the solution isn't raw empathy so much as perspective-taking: meaning deliberately imagine how the other person sees the world (their fears, values, desires) so you can actually move them. When it comes to our interactions with those we just can't seem to get along with, we can always ask better questions, pay more attention, and hunt for uncommon commonalities that let you influence without losing yourself.

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