Your bones start to creak, your hearing goes bad, and wrinkles come out everywhere. Just when you think it can't get any worse...a grey pubic hair appears out of nowhwere. Getting old sucks.

The best gift for some can be the worst nightmare for others. After bringing the Tivo in to the house, the TV is now off limits for Virginia as Roxanne works overtime to tape every show ever made, and to make it all fit on only a 40-hour Tivo.

Now you can pee by the side of the road, write your name in the snow or just drain the turtle standing up. They also make great party favors. Order yours today at www.dontsquat.com

It's the beginning of the month. That makes it the perfect time for us to review our monthly horoscopes to see what kind of month we're going to have. Sound like it's shaping up to be a fun-filled one with new partners and a 3.5 week romance for each of us. Don't forget the dental dams.

It used to be that you only had to choose between small, medium, large and x-large. Today these kids have so many new labels that it's hard to keep up. It's a good thing we have Logo, the gay PBS, to help keep us up-to-date.

Just telling someone that it's over is sometimes not enough. Of course, having crazy breakup sex with her right after you tossed her out isn't making the message any easier to understand.

Liz stops by for a chat about what it takes to be a Real Lesbian, and let's us know that it's really not as easy as it looks. Simply owning power tools is not going to be enough to earn you a passing grade as a Real Lesbian. Find out if you have what it takes.

The dating world is a very treacherous place these days. Seemingly nice single girls come with all kinds of baggage, red flags and even girlfriends. Some of them still live with those girlfriends! More reasons not to break up with your current mate.

We run down our lists of who's hot, and talk about the rules of engagement if one of them should suddenly show up at the front door. After all, it's important to know ahead of time what's acceptable if Angelina Jolie accidentaly turns in to your driveway and knocks on the door ready go.

Soap is available almost everwhere in the world, with only one possible exception...a 5-acre farm in the middle of Colorado. Join us for an update on Stinky! If you missed Stinky the first time, you can download or listen here.