17 January 2021 Call-In

Dear Stef:

I have been single without reciprocated romantic relation since I’m 18, and I’m now 45. This is the thing that has negatively affected me most of my life.

I had a childhood from which I got anxiety, depression and a low self-esteem. I live alone since I’m 24, but I have almost always been emotionally alone and sad since my parents divorced when I was 4.

I studied and work in a field where it’s almost only men (aircraft engines maintenance), and I don’t really like to go out, especially alone. I still made a bachelor degree at part time (a major in history and a minor in German language) during 12 years with the objective of meeting someone. I also tried online dating and dating agencies. No result.

I worked a lot on myself. I spent at least 20 000$ in therapy over the years. I worked out to be less skinny, cut my hair. I’m now 180lbs for 6’0’’ and you can see a picture of me with this email. I was a Marxist when I first met you in person in 2009. Since then I’m a libertarian-anarchist, without being fanatic and dogmatic. I speak 3 languages, I have a good hygiene. I recently bought a beautiful small farm 50 kilometers from Downtown Montreal. I have savings. I have a YouTube Channel with videos against wars, especially on WW2 and Churchill. I’m very proud. I like the person I am. But I hate and despair from my situation of loneliness with no companionship, no love and no sex. I stay alive by many coping mechanism like video games, readings, podcasts, material comfort and my finches. I do take SSRI since 2015, with different dosages, and is seems higher the dosage was, better was the dating experience.

I assume that I’m picky. I find most women unattractive. Being a libertarian and into philosophy doesn’t make things easy. I live in the province of Quebec with the biggest welfare-state and the highest income taxes in North America. I paid over half a million dollars in taxes since I work for almost no services consumed.

I had found one great woman through Freedomain, but she lives in another province, is not healthy, and is afraid that one of us leave his life to join the other. We are still in contact. Knowing her made it even more difficult to settle for less…

Thank you.

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