12 January 2024 Friday Night Livestream

"how do I deal with inlaws who try to manipulate my children?"

Hey Stef what's with adults who want to endulge at the expense of the children? Growing up the adults would have loud family parties well past midnight with lots of alcohol around children of all ages.

Q for Stef:
When I find myself roleplaying with myself, I'll still find myself saying "I don't know" and although my inner Stef says "yes you do" I still find myself fogging out until I finally end the internal conversation, what tips do you have for this cycle of emotionally disconnecting during these roleplays/figuring out if I really "don't know"?

The girl who sold her bath water estimates of up to a net worth of £4.000.000.00 at age.24. Messed up life.

Did you remain heartbroken over your relationship with your parents or did you eventually ‘get over it’?

I think it's hard for people who have good relationships with their parents to imagine what it's like for others who don't.

On this topic, doenst the avoidance of the categories try to eliminate one of our skills as humans to group things together as a way to think faster. Basically with out any sort of labels arent we making thinking harder?

Because it was dysfunctional, so you were robbed of having a good relationship with them. Didn’t that cause you a great deal of emotional pain? It causes me pain and I’ve been trying to figure out how to deal with that my whole life.

But you would expect to not have a good relationship with a cell mate. With a parent you assume it should be good. Having good parents is important isn’t it?

Was it easier for you to dismiss it since your mom was violent and your dad was not there....what would you say to people who it wasnt so cut and dry?


I’m asking because lately I’ve felt sad all over again about my own relationship with my parents. I want to know if you’re still in pain or if you overcame it.


my sadness came from not having my mother when I gave birth because we put them where they belong which is not in the picture. so you give birth and there is no mother to comfort you and help you after . Its just you and your husband. As my husband said " Be glad our family is not here because they would make the situation horrible". He was right but the sadness of not having what other people have was still there. Not for my parents but for what should of been.


Stef, could you please do a philosophical definition of sentimentality?


Stef how did you protect yourslf againts your mom inflicting sentinmentally narratives on you?


When I was 10, I came home from seeing my mother, went up to my room, and cried hard, saying, "I have no mother." It was brutal... but now? That's almost 35 years ago! If I do get sentimental ever, it's like... really? Nah. We already grieved. That's just her shadow in your mind now.

i think this comes up since I told myself stories of us being such a great family....also I bought into the extended families narrative...

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