A Blessing in Divorce

84: PART 1: Our healing begins with our Pain Story and our understanding of it


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We all carry a painstory, a personal narrative shaped by our experiences of trauma, loss, and hardship. Understanding and acknowledging this painstory is crucial for healing after significant life events such as divorce, loss, or abuse. By exploring the origins and impact of our pain, we can begin to unravel the emotional knots that bind us to the past. This process of self-awareness allows us to identify patterns of suffering, recognize triggers, and gradually disempower the pain that has accumulated over time. Through compassionate self-reflection and acceptance, we can transform our painstory from a source of ongoing distress into a catalyst for growth and resilience, fostering a deeper sense of inner peace and emotional freedom.

Triggers of the Pain-Body:

  1. Negative Thoughts and Emotions: Negative thoughts and emotions can feed the pain-body, causing it to grow stronger and more influential over an individual's state of mind and behavior.
  2. Relationships: Close relationships, particularly those involving conflict or intense emotional interactions, can activate the pain-body.
  3. Stressful Situations: High-stress circumstances or situations can trigger the pain-body, bringing old emotional wounds to the surface.
  4. Healing the Pain-Body:

    1. Awareness and Presence: The first step to healing is to become aware of the pain-body's presence. Recognizing when it is active allows an individual to disidentify from it. Practicing presence and staying in the "now" reduces the pain-body's power.
    2. Observation Without Judgment: Observing the pain-body without judgment or reaction can weaken it. By acknowledging its presence without engaging with it emotionally, an individual can prevent it from gaining more energy.
    3. Acceptance: Accepting the pain and understanding it as a part of the human experience can help in the healing process. This acceptance involves not resisting or trying to escape the pain, but rather allowing it to be without feeding it further.
    4. Inner Body Awareness: Focusing on the physical sensations in the body can help in grounding and staying present. This practice can diminish the influence of the pain-body.
    5. LINKS MENTIONED AND MORE

      • Sign up to be the first to know about the August 1st re-launch of the Rising Free divorce support community happening this summer www.theseparationclub.com/rfwaitlist
      • The Healing Heart: https://www.theseparationclub.com/healingheart
      • Join our 2025 retreat in Costa Rica, Feb. 22 - March 1, 2025  https://www.theseparationclub.com/costa-rica-retreat 
      • BUY THE JOY JOURNAL: https://www.theseparationclub.com/the-joy-journal
      • I would love to work with you towards your healing, self-discovery and in creating your new life. Working with a coach is a great way to discover your purpose, your path forward while gaining clarity on your beliefs and core values. I have openings in my calendar for some new clients. https://www.theseparationclub.com/coaching 
      • Download the free Separation Checklist with all the important first steps as you embark on this journey https://theseparationclub.com/separation-checklist
      • Join the private and free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theseparationclub/
      • You can also find me on Instagram @elisabethjoy444 where I share daily inspirations and tips as you navigate your divorce.
      • And the brand new Instagram account for The Joy Journal: @thejoyjournal444 
      • ...more
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        A Blessing in DivorceBy Elisabeth Joy

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