9to5 Entertainment System (9ES)

Man, I was really hoping this episode was just going to be about Last Action Hero. Last Action Hero was great. Great soundtrack, great action, an animated talking cat and Tywin Lannister hiding his exploding eye in sneaky places.

But no, while we definitely do talk quite a bit about Last Action Hero in this episode we also dive into the depravity of Vince McMahon. Vince has been in the news (again) and it seems like Behind the Bastards might need to make a follow up episode because boy, this is some next level stuff.

You might want to just straight up skip over the parts where we talk about his alleged transgressions because it’s all just real fuckin’ gross.

Don’t worry though, we save Last Action Hero for the back half so we go out with a feel good bang! But not before we talk about how the companies that make airplanes are not good at making airplanes anymore! Stay out of the skies kids you might fall!

We’ll see you in two weeks where Keith and Scott will have probably watched more Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Keith will probably be finished with True Detective: Night Country.

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time – we talk about the NHL All Star Game and all that went along with it. Sure we talk a little about the game and the skills competition but we also talk about the most important part of the whole weekend: Michael Bublé on shrooms. Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

The post 9ES303: Doubting Our Commitment To Mean Girls appeared first on 9to5 (dot cc).

I wonder if 25 years from now we will look upon Zack Snyder’s Rebel Moon with fresh eyes and realize that it is in fact a great sci-fi satire the likes of Starship Troopers?

I doubt it.

But for real, Roger Ebert gave ‘Troopers 2 stars back in the 1997. What’s interesting is that his opening paragraph might as well be talking about Rebel Moon:

“Starship Troopers” is the most violent kiddie movie ever made. I call it a kiddie movie not to be insulting, but to be accurate: Its action, characters and values are pitched at 11-year-old science-fiction fans.

You can (and should) say the same thing about Rebel Moon.

I’m a lot more interested in seeing Poor Things from Yorgos Lanthimos. Put a baby’s brain into a woman’s body and run around an absurdist rendering of old timey Europe? Sign me up baby.

Meanwhile – and obviously this doesn’t have to be said (but I’ll say it anyways): Queen fucking rocks. I get that they were so big and bold that to look back on them is almost like looking at a parody band like Spinal Tap or something but hot damn those guys could go. To watch them in their 1981 heyday on a giant IMAX screen with a crazy sound system was a treat.

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time –  we talk a lot about boardgames and also the game of hockey. Professional women’s hockey. Keith got season tickets for the Montreal PWHL team and he took Scott to a game. It’s fun! We also run down some of the board games we’ve been playing like Scout, Psycho Killer, The Grizzled and Frosthaven. Also Scrabble. Scott almost lost to his kid.  Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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You may have noticed that this episode is not a retrospective on 2023. Do you know why? Because Zack Snyder’s Rebel Moon demanded our attention. Nay, Rebel Moon commanded our attention.

Honestly though, we’re all in our 40s now. After 300 episodes aren’t we past the point of devoting entire episodes to looking back at a year? Aren’t they all the same? Doesn’t one day just bleed into the next like the harvests on the backwater moon of Veldt, the farm moon where Kora sought refuge from the Imperium in Zack Snyder’s Rebel Moon?

Don’t you just feel like you may as well just be a robot soldier and you’re just one bad day away from putting antlers on your head and saying fuck it to the whole world? Just like Jimmy from Zack Snyder’s Rebel Moon?

Anyways, who would have thought that there would be honest to goodness news about Tetris in 2024? That it was a 13 year old who hit the first NES kill screen is just somehow even better.

Meanwhile, Scott finally finished watching “Murder at the End of the World” and we finally get to talk about how unsatisfying the ending was. Neat!

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time – Keith “binged” all of Season 3 of True Detective and also blasted through “Avengers: Arena” so we talk about those. That leads to an examination of the works of Jonathan Hickman and whether or not he’s the kind of writer who should be given the keys to the Marvel Universe. Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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Well everyone, we are closing out the year with our 300th episode. It’s time to radically re-brand and make this show the Steamboat Willie Entertainment System. From now on this show (as of January 1st 2024) this show will completely devoted to our fanfics about Steamboat Willie. Steamboat Willie will be getting up to all kinds of no-good in these fanfics. He’ll be having sex, doing drugs and just absolutely living his life balls to the wall. We can’t wait for this exciting new era of podcasting.

Steamboat Willie.

The internet is ablaze with reviews and opinions about Zack Snyder’s Rebel Moon and I promise you that at least one of us will have watched this trashpile by the time next episode rolls around. It will be a bold move by Snyder to add Steamboat Willie into the franchise movie forward but I’m excited to see where it all goes. I promise one of us will have watched it by the time next episode rolls around – not sure if 301 will be a 2023 year-in-review or not yet.

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time Jon takes off so it’s left to Scott and I to hold down the garbage truck. We talk about the mess Jonathan Majors made and how Robert Downey Jr. just might be able to fix it, Scott watched Reacher, I’ve been playing a lot of Mortal Kombat 11 and it’s bonkers. We also talk about the Marvel Star Wars comics which are quite good and Batman and The Flash: The Button which is quite bad. I’m pretty sure we talk a little about Marvel Snap.Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time! 

By the way – the “Stuff Your Should Know” podcast I reference about copyright and intellectual property is here.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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The movie “Totally Killer” is about a teenager who goes back in time to the 80s to find herself going toe-to-toe with a serial killer right out of an 80s slasher film. Henry Kissinger was “Totally Killer” because he his decision making resulted in the death of millions. From Rolling Stone article that Jon mentions in the episode:

The Yale University historian Greg Grandin, author of the biography Kissinger’s Shadow, estimates that Kissinger’s actions from 1969 through 1976, a period of eight brief years when Kissinger made Richard Nixon’s and then Gerald Ford’s foreign policy as national security adviser and secretary of state, meant the end of between three and four million people. That includes “crimes of commission,” he explained, as in Cambodia and Chile, and omission, like greenlighting Indonesia’s bloodshed in East Timor; Pakistan’s bloodshed in Bangladesh; and the inauguration of an American tradition of using and then abandoning the Kurds.

Don’t worry though, we also talk about modding trading cards and playing Warhammer – we’re still that kind of podcast.

Also – looking to crowdsource this question: What movies used their advertising to misdirect the audience? Let us know.

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time! We talk about what might be coming up in Episode 300 (spoilers: it might be nothing special at all – or will it?) and how “One Piece” is one of the most profitable and long running franchises in history. We also (of course) talk about Batman. You thought I was going to say Marvel Snap didn’t you? Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

The post 9ES299: Better Than 13 Seasons Of Arrow appeared first on 9to5 (dot cc).

This is something new!

Keith is off on vacation, Jon’s sick and Scott’s cool so we’re unloading previously unheard Garbage Time content to cover our asses.

Thanks for listening everyone!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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I think the thing that struck me the most about the Barbie movie is that when Ken has a beach accident (despite being fully qualified for “Beach”) he receives prompt and free medical care. No long wait at the ER. No absurd medical bills after the fact. Barbie Land is a true utopia.

I probably took the wrong thing away from the Barbie movie.

We also talk about Captain Marvel and A Haunting in Venice but you can hear a million takes about those movies all over the internet.

We know why you’re here.

You want us to talk about a 40 year old comic book where the Thing gets into a boxing match with a cosmic fighter known as “The Champion” at Madison Square Garden.

It’s one of Scott’s favorite comics of all time and it’s absolutely crazy, so obviously we spend about the last 20 minutes of the show talking about Marvel Two-In-One Annual # 7. It’s a classic story of a cosmic alien boxing promoter trying arrange some card of a boxing-super card that involves making Hulk, Wonderman, Sasquatch, Doc Samson, Thor, Colossus, Namor and The Thing fight a big space man.

Comic books!

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time! On this week’s episode Jon reveals his diabolical plan to combine Expedition to the Barrier Peaks with a cult RPG from the 80s! We also talk about how Adventure Time might still be the best show in the world and then I once again try (and fail) to convince Scott to watch Andor. But he hates good television so he says no. Enjoy the show! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Look at this majesty:

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Seriously though – imagine being so uncertain of your values as an organization that you thought putting a ban on the colour of tape of hockey players were allowed to use was a good idea. What kind of out of touch garbage people were sitting around a conference room table and legitimately thinking “boy – we need to make sure none of these professional sport-boys use pride tape on their sticks.” Won’t somebody please think of the children!

There’s a part in this episode where Jon suggests that some of his neighbours have gone too far in their Halloween decorations. Decorations are too gruesome and intense! Something must be done. That’s right, the same person who watched Salo and Thanatomorphose multiple times is now asking his neighbours to calm down with the gory Halloween displays. Won’t somebody please think of the children!

The other big topic of this show has to do with the absolute garbage names the PWHL seem to have selected for their inaugural teams.We get into the whole list in the episode but let’s just say I can’t imagine Little Timmy will be too excited to wear a “Montreal Echo” jersey when he heads out to the local skating rink this winter. Won’t somebody please think of the children!

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time, Jono watched that Netflix documentary series about American Gladiators and honestly I just want to know whether or not Laser is ok or not. I’m pretty sure he’s still alive but I’m not going to look it up in case he isn’t. We also get into the age old debate of Marvel vs DC. Keith is reading a LOT of Marvel right now and while it seems to all be pretty good it certainly seems that the “highs” of DC are significantly higher. You be the judge! Enjoy! If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

The post 9ES297: Rainbow Tape appeared first on 9to5 (dot cc).

I am still shocked that Look Who’s Talking Now features the voice talents of Danny Devito…as a dog… in a movie full of pee-pee poo-poo jokes… and does not have him deliver the line “what? poop is funny.” If Look Who’s Talking Now was the origin of that iconic bit of comedy gold it would have opened up a brand new meme on the internet I’m sure of it.

Sadly the movie failed even delivering that possible little historical comedy nugget for Jon’s entertainment. Instead it featured a baby dunking on Charles Barkley.

‘Tis the season for horror movies and it seems like Jon and Scott barely understood the assignment. Jon may have started Guillermo del Toro’s “Pinnochio” but then bailed when it was too dark and scary for his baby.

How is the baby going to get through “Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom” if you’re pulling the plug on Pinnochio? Parents these days.

Meanwhile, Keith watched Marvel’s Werewolf by Night (in black and white because why would you want to watch it in colour) and it was… fine. Those are the kind of hot takes you can come up with when you’re getting close to 300 episodes of pop-culture podcasting.

Meanwhile over on Garbage Time… listen, my show notes on the bonus episode are pretty shoddy this time around, I know we talk about Sextile and The BCASA and I remember that Scott ragged on Drew Barrymore a little, but this episode is almost 40 minutes long and I’m not sure those are the only things we talk about. We probably talk about comic books or television shows because what else do we talk about on these things? Enjoy!. If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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We talk a lot about institutions in this episode of 9ES. Dungeons & Dragons and Wu-Tang Clan are definitely institutions of their established mediums. But where the Wu-Tang Clan Ain’t Nuthin’ to Fuck Wit – perhaps it is time that we start fucking with D&D.

You have no idea how proud I am of writing that intro.

Dungeons & Dragons does seem to exist in a weird intersection of conflicting demands from the players. On the one hand it has over 40 years of hardcore players that demand that each edition is “just so” full of monsters, spells and abilities that they are familiar with and this multi-layered system that is a hodge-podge mess of four decades of rubber bands and glue holding a “game system” together. They never really get to start fresh since they are somehow obligated to transfer over whole chunks of each previous iteration.

On the other hand, it’s the most mainstream RPG there is. It’s basically synonymous with the term “role playing game” and if there is someone out there who is just interested in playing their first RPG they will almost certainly pick up a D&D book to do so.

They’re trying please people who are diehard fans of the hobby for decades and people that just picked up their first player’s handbook because the kids in Stranger Things looked like they were having fun at the same time.

Impossible.

I guess the good news is that they have a pretty decent history of listening to player feedback (possibly to their detriment). So if you care about this as much as we do maybe head over to dndbeyond and start telling them their new stuff sucks.

Tell them to be more like Wu Tang Clan. For the children.

Over on Garbage Time Scott and I talk a little bit about (what else) Marvel Snap (Scott hit Infinite everyone!) before we talk about some movies we’ve been watching recently. The 90s are alive in Garbage Time as we talk about Army of Darkness and Deep Rising. Keith also watched Shudder Exclusive “Who Invited Them?” and that was cool too. If that sounds cool then show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time!

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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