A Life, Folded

When navigating the pain and uncertainty of betrayal trauma, it is not at all uncommon to have your body and nervous system go into survival mode. Everything has changed. Nothing seems real anymore. Everything you thought was true was not. You might find yourself struggling to seek to control something, anything. You might began to feel an almost compulsive need to start amassing items or to make complicated rules around activities you used to enjoy with no stress. Please be patient with yourself. Survival mode can be a way to feel like you are managing the unmanageable. Many of us have been there and self-kindness and compassion will serve you well. 

#alifefolded #betrayaltrauma #grief #griefhealing #betrayaltraumarecovery #survivalmode #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic

Perhaps as you go about making your new year's goals and undertaking a self-audit of your relationships, you have come to a disconcerting realization: that you are allowing, even encouraging, people to use you as their own personal doormats. People pleasing and unfettered helping behaviors at the expense of your own needs are often a survival skill adopted to navigate toxic relationships. The problem is that when we neglect our own needs and put everyone above ourselves, we show up, but we are often resentful and feel used, misunderstood, and unloved. But, with time, healing, and strong boundaries we learn to say no, to take a break when needed so that when we do show up, we do so all in with no underlying resentment and with true gratitude to be able to help.

#alifefolded #selfcare #selfimprovement #betrayaltrauma #betrayal #betrayaltrauma #betrayaltraumarecovery #boundaries #boundariesmatter #boundariesarebeautiful #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic

After learning that I was married to a narcissist, I began doing a lot of research to learn and make sense of my life. I was so surprised to read that one common complaint about narcissists is their purposeful habit of interrupting the proper sleep and rest of their partners. That had been my experience too; I had no idea I was not alone in living this through this kind of manipulative behavior. Why would someone who claims to love you engage in such inappropriate and harmful behaviors that create havoc with a basic human need?

#alifefolded #manipulation #manipulationtactics #manipulationawareness #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic #narcissistsaredangerous #gaslightingrecovery #gaslighting #gaslightingawareness #gaslightingsurvivor #gaslighting101

Have you suffered issues with depression after being betrayed by your intimate partner? If you have, please know that this is an extremely normal reaction to such a jarring and traumatizing event in life, but it seems that it is not spoken about as frequently as other health issues. Have you also found that when you are vulnerable and open up about your struggles, the supportive reaction that you hoped for is not always evident? Why do people seem to want to sometimes shut down when the conversation of depression is brought up, when this is such a common part of our mortal experience?

#alifefolded #depressionisnotajoke #depressionslife #depressionfighter #yourlifematters #youarenotalone #hope #betrayaltrauma #betrayaltraumarecovery #betrayaltraumahealing #cheatinghurts #selflove

His porn use must have something to do with you, right? If you looked more like a porn star, had the surgical enhancements they have, he'd stop, right? You can change and that will make him change, right? WRONG. Porn use, emotional affairs, and nefarious cheating has nothing to do with you and it never has. This is about an individual is choosing to hide behind porn use instead of addressing their character flaws, pain, shame, and healing work they need to do. Please, please don't ever harm yourself or alter your natural beauty because you are being gaslit that if you looked different, he'd stop. These are not the words or requests from a healthy, loving, and committed partner.

#alifefolded #alifefolded #stopporn #pornography #pornkills #pornkillslove #pornaddiction #nomore #selfesteem #selfesteemmatters #selflove #selflovejourney #selfloveisthebestlove #selflovematters #explantsurgery

https://www.antell-md.com/blog/glamour-what-no-one-ever-tells-you-about-breast-implants/

How can we discern if behaviors in our relationship are simply troubling or moving into an area where undue influence is being exerted? The concern with manipulation is that it is slow and insidious in its progression such that it eventually begins to feel normal, caring even. We can at times worry that those we love, or even ourselves, are being manipulated. But how do we know? This episode explores some of the common tactics used by manipulators to control, abuse, and exploit. 

#alifefolded #manipulation #manipulationtactics #manipulationawareness #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic #narcissistsaredangerous #gaslightingrecovery #gaslighting #gaslightingawareness #gaslightingsurvivor #gaslighting101

Hoovering is a common tactic used by cluster b personality disordered individuals to suck their sources of supply back in to their cycle of abuse and drama. What is hoovering? How do you know what is real and what has been made up to influence you? How do you recognize hoovering tactics? Why is it dangerous? And, how do you protect yourself from the narcissist's unending toxic cycle of love bombing, denigration, and discard?

#alifefolded #hoovering #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic

It is common to hear things such as: porn hurts no one! It's a harmless past time! It protects me and actually keeps me from cheating. Nonsense. If individuals don't understand that porn is cheating, they need a bracing reality check. This episode delves further into how porn is permanently damaging not only the self-esteem and feelings of self-worth of the partner but ALSO the consumer of porn. 

#alifefolded #stopporn #pornography #pornkills #pornkillslove #pornaddiction #nomore #selfesteem #selfesteemmatters #selflove #selflovejourney #selfloveisthebestlove #selflovematters

Why would people who have been your friends, neighbors, or even family members suddenly start to vilify and lie about you? Well, if you are removing yourself from a relationship with a narcissist or cluster b-personality disordered individual, they have to have individuals who support and champion them, no matter what horrible behavior they engage in. Hello, flying monkeys! Why do flying monkeys exist, who are they, and what is their motivation for such hurtful and unfair behavior?

#alifefolded #selfcare #selfimprovement #betrayaltrauma #betrayal #betrayaltrauma #betrayaltraumarecovery #boundaries #boundariesmatter #boundariesarebeautiful #flyingmonkeys #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistic

 https://www.verywellmind.com/narcissists-and-flying-monkeys-7552473

What if what makes you the most attractive to others is when you are living your authentic life, healing, discovering yourself, and not inhabiting a space where you tell yourself you can only be happy when you have a partner? 

#alifefolded #betrayal #betrayaltrauma #betrayaltraumarecovery #selflovematters #selfcare #datingafterdivorce #datingafterbetrayal