Accessing Your Best Self with Devorah Vale

One of the 48 ways to wisdom brought down in Pirkei Avos is to love rebuke. When we receive criticism properly we can model for those around us how we welcome instruction that will help us grow and change.

How can we use humor to help us deal with people who repeatedly hurt and insult us? Humor takes a serious subject that could be very intense and keeps it light. Humor makes us laugh at a situation that could potentially make us cry. When we understand that humor means "having a sharp eye for the weaknesses of others with no devaluation of them" then we can combine insight with love to deflect the potential pain others may cause us.

One of the tools for dealing with internalized anger is Tochacha or Giving Rebuke. This is a mitzva from the Torah which teaches us that we should have a conversation with the person who has wronged us. However, this is very difficult to do properly and can often make things worse. How can we learn to give constructive criticism without doing more damage. Join me as we explore tips for making our words easier to receive.

Rabbeinu Yona teaches that we have to see Hashem in everything. We have to ask Him for success in all that we do as we go through our day. This is Mindfulness the Jewish way. Flexing our bitachon muscle when things are going well will help us through the difficult times.

Having bitachon also means that we believe that if Hashem gave us certain mitzvot to do, then we can not lose by doing them! We can rely on Hashem's promises. For example, keeping the Shabbat and eating kosher, giving a tenth to tzedaka, or observing the laws of shmitta will not deplete your earnings. This seems irrational, illogical and counterintuitive but the Master of Bitachon believes that Hashem keeps His promises.

How does our chomer affect how we respond to insult and annoyances that others inflict upon us? Where does our free will kick in and help us work to change our first angry response into a healthier secondary response of being able to let it go.

This course presents a definition of hakpada and the 3 concentric circles of relationship. What does the Torah tell us to do with feelings of hatred and resentment towards others who we feel have wronged us? We are not allowed to take revenge, bear a grudge or even hate someone in our heart so how can we rid ourselves of the 'toxic effects' that internalized anger and resentment breed. Join me as we discover the tools that will help us free ourselves from negativity which threatens our happiness and tranquility of spirit.

In this week's class we analyze the prayer called Tshuva. Tshuva means return but how can we return to a place that we never visited? The Medrash teaches us that we are returning to what we once knew. Way back in the embryo as a fetus we were taught the entire Torah and upon birth, we forgot it all. Our mission is to return to our essence, to what we once knew. The wisdom of the Torah that will guide us to reconnect to our Source, our Creator and to our Strength and our Clarity. The mitzva of tshuva is always available to us. When we begin the process of change, Hashem takes us the rest of the way.

Learn about the "Good Smell Exercise" and how Hashem's kindness surrounds the One who Trusts in Him. While Yosef was travelling down to Egypt, sold by his brothers and assumed dead by his father, Hashem was letting Yosef know that He was right there with him. Channukah teaches us not only to search for the light at the end of the tunnel,, but to find the light while we are in the tunnel. Bitachon helps us to see Hashem in the midst of challenges and even pain. Learn about 'the swipe of the knife".

In this class, we begin the request section of the Shemona Esrei. We start by asking for the most important of all commodities. WISDOM. This comes before asking for PROSPERITY or anything else because it is our intellect and ability to reason/think that makes us uniquely human. With our intellect we recognize how dependent we are on Hashem for everything and so we begin to ask. The more helpless a person feels, the more HELPFUL Hashem can be. This is the principle upon which this request section stands. Please join me on this journey through Shemona Esrei.