Christian chapel owners face fines and jail time over gay wedding refusal; Nazis paid millions in Social Security benefits; Al Sharpton is a plagiarist; Snoop Dogg & Kim Kardashian have birthdays; Funkhouser informs us that beer is now spreadable

Russia is number one and America is number five on a list of the most educated countries; President Obama's credit card denied at a NYC restaurant; Men still pay all the dating expenses because of guilt; Funkhouser was up before the sun to take his girlfriend to the airport, harbors resentment (but that could be the lack of sleep talking) AD's car won't start

The city of Houston issues subpoenas demanding pastors turn over sermons dealing with homosexuality, gender identity or Annise Parker, is this separation of church and state or a free speech violation or both? Kim Jong-Un is back; five things that will get you kicked off a flight; Funkhouser ponders what to do with his new-found freedom now that his girlfriend is away on a business trip (the show dets disrupted by random boobs)

Indigenous Peoples day might be just as offensive as Columbus day if you crack open the history books; NBC journalist breaks quarantine for fast food; a guy in Minnesota handed out 520,000 sandwiches to the homeless last year; Funkhouser knows 1/3 of the porn stars on twitter

Amanda Bynes is back on involuntary Psychiatric hold after claiming her father abused her, this sparks a conversation about how we treat people with mental illnesses in this country; Raven Symone floors Oprah when she says she considers herself American not African-American; 14 Year Old Girl kicks the crap out of a would-be attacker; Funkhouser brings girlfriend to work, makes for a better Monday.

Former schoolteacher reveals how she became member of all-female ISIS brigade; AD encourages you to make the most of your weekend; plans for an all-female Ghostbusters are in the works; we learn how easy it is to make a Lorde record from South Park; Funkhouser gets his sick girlfriend chicken soup.

Donating money makes you feel good for a week, donating time makes you feel good for a month. Is this proof of the existence of God? Maybe. Are there too many superhero TV shows and movies out? Club DJs now earn more than Hollywood stars. English man has 17 hour erection & drains two pints of blood from it. Funkhouser remains even tempered.

White lesbian suing a sperm bank after she ended up with a black baby; a woman names Isis wants the media to find a different name for the terrorist group; Romney vs Hilary in 2016; Funkhouser has never heard of Twin Peaks and dogs are awesome.

Bands are starting to ban cellphones at concerts; AD talks about how lack of human contact in the digital age is a very dangerous thing so the cellphone ban might be a good idea; then he and Funkhouser reveal themselves as complete hypocrites for being on a new social network.

How letting go and forgiveness is essential to human progress; have superhero movies and TV shows run their course; Deceased veteran's widow refuses to pay "hilarious" bill from the VA; Funkhouser showers sitting down.