Addiction Makes Three

It's essentially new year same situation unless.... YOU do things differently. Stay with me here because I say that with love from my heart to yours.

Now, I know it's not easy to have a great year that is so much better than the year that's just gone (I know!) and it's possible. Truly.

We get wrapped up in the false sense of a New Year reset, that things will somehow be different.

We tell ourselves a new year is a fresh start a clean slate, a whole 365 days of opportunity ahead and another trip around the sun.

We tell ourselves that hings will be better this year, that this year has to be better than last year...

And I'm going to ask you... what has changed? What is going to make this year better than last? What is going to make this year different?

In this episode I chat about New Year's resolutions being a bit nonsense and what you can do instead.

And everything I talk about is possible - it's not pie in the sky stuff. And I chat a lot about the process of change and what will truly help if you want to make this year better.

Show Notes:

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This is the year 2024, I made a decision in 2019 "Not this" and so began my slow (Because I didn't get support for myself) recovery.

And in January 2024 I had a stumble, a lapse...

In this episode I go into a real time lapse I had in my own recovery. I literally recorded this episode the next day - because it was a teachable moment, for me and you.

I'm showing up here authentically, and that means I want you to know I am absolutely human and not perfect and that I stumble too, so that you don't feel crap when you stumble. Because guess what, you will 100% because this isn't easy and we are human.

So I go deep on how we get to a lapse or relapse situation (hint: You have to be actually be MAKING or trying to make positive changes in your life) and the process of how we go about change.

I discuss a very small example of some behaviours that do not serve us (but make complete sense when we are doing them) and how to know when we are on the up.

I share how I fell off the goodness bus, what it 'was' that I did, and how I came through it.

Change is hard, and it's worth it. So I hope that by me sharing the ins and outs of my stumble, that you will feel motivated to START making changes if you haven't already, or that if you too are just human like me, that you give yourself a bit of that grace you so freely throw about for others, dust yourself off and get back at it.

The alternative is go down the rabbit hole - let's not do that. Please do not do that.

I know it's hard to start - and honestly - it is something you will NEVER regret doing. And I say that with 100% certainty, no matter which direction your goodness takes you.

Show Notes:

I love getting mail! Send me an email here or [email protected]

Would you like the weekly wellness wires emails in your inbox - Yes please!

Are we Instagram friends?

Book in a friendly chat: Click here to find a time

If you'd like to implement what have been learning on the podcast Join the waitlist for the next Pathway to Wellness Coaching Program: Drop your details here

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this two part episode, I chat to the beautiful Andy Quin.

Andy is the Co-founder of ETCH Sparkling with Husband Jason, a lovely friend and member of the community, wonderful mother and wife.

I am so grateful to have Andy here, who so courageously and bravely agreed to come and chat with me about her own experience being on the other side of addiction as her husband Jason struggled with alcohol.

I know you will hear your story as Andy shares hers, even if some of the details are different. The confusion, the denial, the inability to see what was right in front of her, and then the secrets, lies and what she describes as her husband Jason who was her rock, slowly crumbling.

In Part 2 we talk about how embedded Alcohol was in Jason's identity with his career and passion and how with the drinks at ETCH, giving acknowledgement that there is a special ritual around drinks and how we can do that in a non-alcoholic way with drinks that are for adults and can be part of that social inclusion and socialising.

We speak about how being in a relationship with addiction impacted Andy's wellbeing and she shares how she took care of herself in the tricky times, and that in fact how much gratitude she has in her life having come through the other side, and how rich her life is. Andy really tells the story of how important it is to do your own work and it's about being intentional over time. To consistently show up for yourself.

We share a little laugh about our shared 'destination recovery' vision, and how, in fact, recovery can be very busy too - that it takes time, and commitment.

Andy, along with Jason have created a great life, and Andy was instrumental in that. In creating her great life - that it was all in her and nothing or anyone outside of here did that. And really, that deserves a huge pat on the back - that is truly inspiring and something to be proud of.

Learning to trust herself was instrumental in moving forward - to trust her gut. To trust what she knows.

In this chat, we are brave, we take big breaths and we sip our respective cups of tea and coffee in different states in Australia, telling our story in the hope that it helps someone else.

I cannot thank Andy enough for sitting in her discomfort and having this conversation.

Show Notes:

I love getting mail! Send me an email here or [email protected]

Would you like the weekly wellness wires emails in your inbox - Yes please!

Are we Instagram friends?

Book in a friendly chat: Click here to find a time

If you'd like to implement what have been learning on the podcast Join the waitlist for the next Pathway to Wellness Coaching Program: Drop your details here

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this two part episode, I chat to the beautiful Andy Quin.

Andy is the Co-founder of ETCH Sparkling with Husband Jason, a lovely friend and member of the community, wonderful mother and wife.

I am so grateful to have Andy here, who so courageously and bravely agreed to come and chat with me about her own experience being on the other side of addiction as her husband Jason struggled with alcohol.

I know you will hear your story as Andy shares hers, even if some of the details are different. The confusion, the denial, the inability to see what was right in front of her, and then the secrets, lies and what she describes as her husband Jason who was her rock, slowly crumbling.

In Part 1 we chat about a 20 year love story that was fully entwined with another love story, the romance of the wine industry. And a tale of normalised drinking culture and a realisation from Jason that alcohol might be a problem. As we spoke this week, it was recently Jason's 5 year anniversary from when he had his last drink and Andy and I chat about the rocky path of recovery, for our lovely people and also, for us.

When we dive a little deeper as to when things started to become a problem for Andy, her story of being heavily pregnant and not knowing if Jason was going to be able to drive her to the hospital 40 minutes away, really took my breath away - as that is a core memory of mine in my story too.

We speak about feeling invisible and needing that praise and acknowledgement of we too have done hard, brave and courageous things along side our loved ones. And how we have often felt forgotten.

In this chat, we are brave, we take big breaths and we sip our respective cups of tea and coffee in different states in Australia, telling our story in the hope that it helps someone else.

Andy speaks to a real fear that many of us have when we have a loved one grappling with addiction and navigating recovery. The fear of loss. It's hard to listen to and hard to think about - but this is part of the reality in this space.

I cannot thank Andy enough for sitting in her discomfort and having this conversation.

Part 2 of this conversation will be out next week as we continue our chat of the other side of addiction.

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):

👉 Download the guide

📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode we are diving into the Holidays when you love someone struggling with addiction.

It can be a turbulent time full of uncertainty, and nothing highlights the gaps in our lives more than the relentless parade of seemingly perfect holiday snapshots flooding our social media feeds. It can be a bit much.

But we can have Happy-ish Holidays and I share a few things to be mindful of and seven tips to help you have happy-ish holidays within the reality of loving someone struggling with addiction.

We need to be mindful of where we put our precious resources and try and stay out of comparison - which can be hard at this time of year when the 'perfection' is very much in your face!

Let's manage our expectations and balance the grief with the joy.

Set boundaries and cultivate gratitude.

Implement self care rituals and embrace imperfections.

Learn how to chuck comparison in the trash and focus on what you can control.

And really leaning into what makes sense for you and your family this holiday season.

I hope you truly have a happy-ish holidays, because we might not be having the happiest of holidays and yet we can still have some happy-ish holidays. FOR SURE!

Show Notes

I love getting mail! Send me an email here or [email protected]

Would you like the weekly wellness wires emails in your inbox - Yes please!

Are we Instagram friends?

Book in a friendly chat: Click here to find a time

If you'd like to implement what have been learning on the podcast Join the waitlist for the next Pathway to Wellness Coaching Program: Drop your details here

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On the show this week we start the conversation on thoughts - and how powerful they are.

We have thousands of thoughts a day, from the moment we wake until we close our eyes at night, and sometimes beyond!

We are always generally thinking about something... These thoughts might include garden-variety, everyday musings:

These thoughts might include garden-variety, everyday musings, or more complex, deeper thoughts, or more painful thoughts...

Like will I ever get to live the life I had dreamed of, or one of the most painful thoughts, "Why are they choosing a substance over me?"

And let's unravel how this plays out in our behaviour and relationships and how we can workout which thougths are helpful and which thoughts are unhelpful.

I give real life examples of unhelpful thoughts I have had and some of the most painful thoughts I have heard my clients express.

And there is a gift here - that if you can master how to manage your painful and unhelpful thoughts, then you will change the trajectory of your life.

You will navigate sliding door 'thought' moments with ease and make good decisions intentionally.

And you will be able to share this skill and absolute life flex at your dinner table, with your little and big people - helping them catch their unhelpful thoughts.

You can change your life, you influence change in others and you can lead the way. Tune in to find out how.

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):

👉 Download the guide

📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In Episode 5 I dive into the archives and resurface the feelings and frustrations I felt back in January 2020 (and some of them still stand!)

"What about us" is the start of the conversation as to what it's like to be on this side of addiction and being invisible. And when rehab facilities put so much pressure on families to do 'the right thing' yet provide zero helpful support and tools.

When you are living and existing through some of the most challenging and frightful days of our life, yet shame and stigma keeps you doing so in silence... so no one knows to ask how you are doing.

I hope that if there are people that have or are struggling with addiction listening in - that they encourage their family and spouse to get support for THEMSELVES.

We all need our support crew, our A Team - the people that catch us.

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):

👉 Download the guide

📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wow.

What an episode and always a great conversation - of which we can never seem to make it short!

Gary and I had quite a few extensive conversations on Instagram, and this is our first podcast chat.

We cover many topics and go deep into some dark corners here and pull back the covers on a few things that are a little bit and sometimes a lot uncomfortable - which is what you'd expect from a conversation with Gary!

We talk about the avoidance of admitting or identifying a problem, and the culmination of adding years to the problem. How societal acceptance of some behaviour plays in further to our bargaining. How and when to build your success (not in the crisis moments!) and the peace of knowing who you are and what you stand for so that you find your people rather than trying to fit in with the wrong pack.

We dive deep into the cost of addiction, and Gary brings his usual show stopper here on where the cost sits and who is responsible. Spoiler alert, it might be you.

How we can all sit in destination happiness and why that's not helping you or your loved one.

And knowing that change is hard, yet also simple and it takes commitment.

Let us know what you think!

• For more information and support and to find out how you can work with me for 1:1 and group coaching, check out the website or find me on Instagram.

• New episodes weekly.

• Please rate and review the podcast if you enjoy it.

To get in touch with Gary, here are some places he can be found

https://garyfahey.com/

On Instagram at Strong Men'd

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):

👉 Download the guide

📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In episode 3 I am asking the question - "where is my gawd damn lasagne?"

As I dig into the archives (Again) and find a blog post that I wrote back in October 2019, titled, "No lasagne for you!" A blog post that I never posted... because I decided against doing a blog!

And why... why when we are in some of the toughest, most confusing, exhausting and scary times of our life, do we not have people lining up to support us?

I speak about how we dance with our shame, secrecy and denial and how that keeps us stuck.

All the grief we go through (just scratching the surface on this one) and how we can sometimes try and bargain with the grief gods.

I propose some first small steps to take, if you have not yet put your hand up for suppport and what this could look like

New episodes weekly.

Please rate and review the podcast if you enjoy it, it's been helpful or thought provoking. This helps those that need to find this message do so.

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):

👉 Download the guide

📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The early signs of addiction are rarely obvious.

They’re blurry, confusing, and often dismissed as “not a big deal.” But here’s the truth: if someone’s behaviour is causing you pain, it’s a problem even if they don’t see it that way.

In this episode, Amanda explores:

• The “slow burn” beginning of addiction (and why you don’t need to pinpoint when it started)
• Why denial feels safe (and why it also keeps us stuck)
• The subtle signs that something isn’t right, from breath-holding to late-night Google searches
• Why losing trust in yourself is often the biggest casualty

This conversation is for anyone who’s ever thought: “Am I overreacting? Or is something really wrong?”

🎧 Listen now and learn how to recognise the early signs without turning them into a stick to beat yourself with.

Subscribe to the podcast for more honest conversations, share this episode with someone who might need it, or dive into any of the resources and invitations below.

✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:

 If you want to start choosing differently but don’t know where to start…

Amanda created a 3-day self-paced workshop for women just like you.

👉 It’s called Discovery to Recovery and it’s only $77.

Get clarity, calm, and your next small step here: Get the Discovery to Recovery workshop here

If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy): 👉 Download the guide

You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.

👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible

Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.

You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.