ADHD Late to Know

Episode 18: Unmasking Leadership with Nicola Knobel

What if the problem was never neurodivergent people — but the workplaces and leadership models we’ve been trying to force ourselves into?

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, I’m joined by author, TEDx speaker, and people-first leader Nicola Knobel for a powerful conversation about neurodivergent leadership, psychological safety, masking, and the future of inclusive workplaces.

As two AuDHD women in leadership, we explore the reality of navigating professional spaces that often reward neurotypical communication styles — and what needs to change for neurodivergent people to genuinely belong and thrive.

We discuss:

• ADHD, autism & masking in leadership

• Why traditional leadership models often fail neurodivergent people

• Psychological safety and authentic leadership

• The hidden toll of burnout, productivity pressure & late diagnosis

• Why inclusion must go beyond awareness posters and gestures

• Strength-based leadership and neuroinclusive workplaces

• The future of work through a more human, people-centred lens

This is an honest, validating and thought-provoking conversation for anyone navigating adult ADHD, autism, leadership, or professional belonging.

If you’ve ever felt like you had to mask who you are to succeed at work — this episode will make you feel seen.

Resources:

Connect & follow Nicola Knobel:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolaknobel/

Website: https://nicolaknobel.com/

Unmasking Leadership by Nicola Knobel:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Unmasking-Leadership-Neurodivergent-Psychological-Workplaces/dp/0473767562

What does it look like to navigate academia as a neurodivergent woman — and a mother — in a system that wasn’t designed for you?

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, we explore the lived experience of ADHD, autism, and dyslexia in academic environments, through the lens of identity, motherhood, and professional belonging.

This is a real, reflective and insightful conversation about the challenges — and reasonable adjustments — of being neurodivergent in high-performance, structured systems.

We explore:

• The experience of ADHD, autism and dyslexia in academia

• The added layer of motherhood and invisible load

• Burnout, energy management, and sustainability

• Finding balance in a system that doesn’t naturally support neurodivergence

• The importance of psychological safety and belonging in academic spaces

This episode speaks to a wider conversation around adult ADHD, autism, neurodivergent women, and professional belonging — and what needs to change to create more inclusive environments.

If you’re a neurodivergent woman, working in academia, or navigating ADHD or autism as an adult, this episode will help you feel seen — and remind you that the system isn’t always built for your brain, but that doesn’t mean you don’t belong in it.

Dr Alix Dietzel:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-alix-dietzel-63029625/

ADHD, Autism & Ruminating Thoughts – Why Your Brain Won’t Switch Off

Why do ruminating thoughts feel so intense with ADHD and autism — and why can they be so hard to switch off?

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, we explore the lived experience of rumination in adult ADHD and AuDHD — from overthinking and mental loops to emotional processing and nervous system overwhelm.

This is a real, reflective conversation that blends personal experience with deeper insight — ideal for anyone looking to better understand life with ADHD and autism, especially as an adult navigating work, identity, and belonging.

We explore:

• Why rumination shows up in ADHD and autism

• The link between neurological differences and rumination loops

• How rumination impacts daily life, work, and relationships

• Practical ways to gently interrupt thought spirals

If you’re navigating adult ADHD, AuDHD, or feeling stuck in your thoughts, this episode will help you feel seen — and offer a new way to understand what’s happening.

ADHD Late to Know is a podcast exploring adult ADHD, autism, and neurodivergence — through lived experience, research, and real conversations that create “that makes sense” moments.

Resources:

• How Does ADHD Cause Intrusive Thoughts?
• Why Can’t I Let It Go? Rumination and the ADHD Brain
• The ADHD Brain Revealed: The Surprising Truth of the Default Mode Network
• Neural Basis of Why We Fail to Control Unwanted Thoughts
• Rejection Sensitivity Explained
• 10 Tips to Manage Ruminating Thoughts That Come With ADHD
• ADHD: The "Ferrari Engine with Bicycle Brakes"
• ADHD Explained: The Brain’s Braking System

What does it look like to build a life, relationship, and business as a neurodivergent couple?

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, I sit down with a neurodivergent married couple to explore the realities of navigating ADHD, autism, family life, and business — together.

This is a fun, honest and meaningful conversation about:

• Supporting each other with different neurotypes

• Navigating marriage, communication & energy needs

• Building businesses that actually work for neurodivergent brains

• The gaps in support for neurodivergent & disabled people

• How they’re helping change what’s available

This episode is full of lived experience, insight, and real-life examples of what support can actually look like.

If you’re neurodivergent, in a relationship, building something, or figuring it all out — this one will resonate.

Show Notes:

Purpl Discounts:

https://www.purpldiscounts.com/

https://www.instagram.com/purpldiscounts/

Brilliantly Different Coaching:

https://www.instagram.com/brilliantlydifferentcoaching/

https://neuroworkpartners.com/brilliantly-different/

If you’ve ever felt like you’re failing because you can’t stay consistent, this episode will change how you understand your brain.

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, I explore why traditional productivity advice often fails ADHD and AuDHD adults — and why persistence, not consistency, is the real path to progress.

We dive into the neuroscience behind commitment, executive function, and attention - including why shame spirals, rejection sensitivity, and autistic inertia can make starting or returning to tasks feel impossible.

You’ll also learn practical strategies for working with your neurodivergent brain rather than against it, including:

• The Minimum Version Rule for hard days

• How curiosity enables persistence with ADHD

• Why persistence reduces shame and burnout

• How to return to tasks after setbacks without all-or-nothing thinking

If you’re late diagnosed with ADHD or AuDHD, this episode will help you reframe productivity, self-compassion, and what real progress looks like.

Show Notes & Research Resources:

Core ADHD & AuDHD Theories

• Dr. William Dodson — The Interest-Based Nervous System

https://www.additudemag.com/secrets-of-the-adhd-brain/

• Dr. Russell Barkley — Executive Function & Consistent Inconsistency

https://www.russellbarkley.org/factsheets.html

• Dinah Murray — Monotropism Theory of Autism

https://monotropism.org

Emotional & Mindset Research

• Dr. Barbara Fredrickson — Broaden-and-Build Theory

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3122271/

• Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria & Emotional Dysregulation

https://www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd/

• Self-Compassion & Executive Function

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201603/self-compassion-and-adhd

Cognitive Barriers

• Autistic Inertia Research

https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.631876

Travel can feel exciting… and completely destabilising when you have ADHD, autism, or AuDHD.

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, I share my real-time experience travelling for work (Texas) and for joy (South Korea & Japan) — navigating time zones, cancelled flights, sensory overload, hunger crashes, rage responses, demand avoidance, and nervous system regulation.

We explore:

• Why travel disrupts ADHD and autistic regulation
• Sensory stagnation and feeling “trapped”
• Low blood sugar & emotional reactivity
• Rejection sensitivity and travel rage
• The nuance of ADHD impulsivity vs autistic rigidity
• Protecting energy while still showing up
• How to enjoy iconic experiences (like Shibuya Crossing) without overwhelming your nervous system

I also share practical strategies that helped:

• Snack planning & predictable meal anchors
• Buying yourself 30–60 seconds to reduce reactive anger
• “What’s your number?” emotional check-ins
• Intentional social boundaries
• Observing instead of immersing
• Choosing experiences aligned with your actual joy

If you struggle with travel anxiety, ADHD overwhelm, autistic burnout, or routine disruption — this episode will help you feel less alone and more equipped.

Because growth isn’t avoiding hard things.

It’s learning how to meet them differently

Being neurodivergent comes with hidden costs — not just emotionally, but to our energy, health, finances, and long-term wellbeing.

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, I explore the tax of ADHD and Autism from an AuDHD adult perspective: how chronic stress, masking, nervous system overload, and lack of support quietly add up — and what we can do to protect ourselves.

We talk about:

• Research linking ADHD and autism to poorer health outcomes and reduced life expectancy
• Why burnout and exhaustion aren’t personal failures — they’re systemic
• The financial tax of neurodivergence: impulse spending, forgotten subscriptions, convenience costs
• Protecting energy through pacing, boundaries, and safer socialising
• Intentional thinking about your future self — wanting to feel nourished, rested, and steadily working toward what matters
• Practical systems that lower the tax without shame or perfectionism

This episode is about awareness, self-advocacy, and building a life that costs you less to live — and gives you more back.

For adults with ADHD, autism, AuDHD — and those who want to understand and support them better.

• Cambridge University (2025), British Journal of Psychiatry — ADHD & long-term health outcomes
• National Autistic Society (UK) — Autism, wellbeing & life expectancy
• Tools discussed: energy budgeting, safe social plans, future-self thinking, payday money pots, subscription audits

In this episode of ADHD Late to Know, Holly is joined by Ria from Ri-Align Coaching, an ADHD-specialist coach supporting ambitious, high-achieving adults who feel overwhelmed, burnt out, or stuck despite their capability.

Ria shares her powerful late-diagnosis journey — from years of feeling like life was on “hard mode” to finding clarity through ADHD understanding and building a career aligned with her strengths. Together, Holly and Ria explore what late-identified ADHD and AuDHD can really look like in adulthood, including burnout, emotional dysregulation, masking, people-pleasing, rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), and self-doubt.

This conversation gently reframes ADHD away from constant self-fixing and towards self-trust, nervous system awareness, and working with your brain instead of against it. Ria also explains how ADHD-informed coaching helps clients rediscover their strengths, rebuild confidence, and move forward in a more sustainable way — especially when traditional routes haven’t worked.

The episode also covers:

• Why so many ADHD adults feel “capable but exhausted”
• The impact of lifelong micro-criticisms and masking
• How strengths can become saboteurs without boundaries
• The role of coaching in late diagnosis and identity rebuilding
• ADHD support at work, reasonable adjustments, and Access to Work
• Why chemistry and safety matter so much in coaching relationships
• The “penny-drop” moments that change everything for Ria’s clients

If you’re late to understanding your ADHD, questioning your neurodivergence, or learning how to build a life you feel proud of, this episode will help you feel seen, validated, and less alone.

🔗 Find Ria:

Website: ri-align.co.uk

Instagram: @rialigncoaching

This episode is a neurodivergent reset for 2026. I reflect on what I’m letting go of from 2025 — pressure, masking, people-pleasing — and what I’m choosing instead: priorities, nervous system safety, and living more unmasked with ADHD and autism.

I share how understanding my brain has changed how I set intentions, manage energy, and move through hard moments with more compassion and clarity.

If you’re navigating a late ADHD or autism diagnosis — or supporting someone who is — this episode offers reflection, practical reframes, and a grounded way to move into the new year without abandoning yourself.

What happens when you finally get an ADHD or autism diagnosis — and then have to explain it to the people who’ve known you your whole life?

In this special New Year episode of Late to Know, I’m joined by my first-ever guests — Amy, diagnosed with ADHD, and Rhi, diagnosed with autism — as we reflect on late diagnosis, misdiagnosis, and the emotional work of helping others understand the parts of us they couldn’t see.

Together, we talk openly about:

• Being treated for anxiety and depression when ADHD or autism was the missing piece
• The relief and fear that comes with late diagnosis
• Masking, shame, and feeling like a fraud when you finally tell people the truth
• How it can be invalidating when loved ones sometimes respond with “but everyone feels like that”
• Letting go of self-blame and unrealistic expectations as we head into a new year
• Learning to set boundaries without believing you’re a “bad friend”
• Navigating relationships, work, and feedback when your brain struggles to feel “finished”

This episode is for adults navigating the early stages of ADHD or autism diagnosis — and for partners, friends, and family who want to understand their neurodivergent loved ones better.

New year. Same me. Just with more clarity, compassion, and language for what’s always been there.