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-------Lesson Dialog-------

----Simplified ----

凌晨三点半 外出跑步，出了一身臭汗，同居密友 突然想打拳，于是在回家的路上一边喊一边练习（貌似听见了小孩在哭，现在的孩子起得真早）

凌晨四点半 在家洗澡 舒服舒服 活着的感觉真好

早上五点 本想去地坛散步，谁晓得破公园开门这么晚，忽听有人大喊 “唉！！！” 回眸一看原来是位老太太在练声，不知道的还以为是在喊救命呢，于是乎我们和老太太一起喊了起来

早上六点 回家的路上发现一位老大爷在撞树，顿时兴趣大发，找了一个电线杆和大爷一起撞

早上七点 在家吃饭，由于懒得刷碗直接把热水倒入方便面袋里，别说空间小泡得还真快

早上八点 在家除虫，半小时后发现，虫子没死，洗手间的蜘蛛挂了！

早上九点 在家读书，本以为是一本讲述女性意识觉醒的书，竟从女权主义讲到了女王意识

下午一点 午饭过后的休息时间，不知从何时开始竟然喜欢裸睡了

下午三点 外出买书，准备回家的时候发现车子上又被夹上了广告，定眼一看，治疗不孕不育！！！汗！

下午五点 姐们儿给我打电话要我去她家吃饭，被我断然拒绝，原因,她要陪她老公出去又不能把她妈一个扔在家里

晚上 随着太阳的下落，似乎一天的激情也要告一段落，可邻居偏不让人消停。 伴随着清脆的摔打声对面的小两口互骂“你大爷的！！” 此时我真想站出来说“大爷挺好的，您俩休息会儿吧”

半夜睡觉就不细说了，少儿不宜。

----English----

I went out for a run at three thirty in the morning and worked up a real sweat. My roommate and good friend wanted to practice martial arts, and I ran into her practicing and grunting on the side of the road on the way back (it was like listening to a small child cry, children today get up really early).

Took a shower at four thirty at home. It was really comfortable. Felt great to be alive.

At five thirty I wanted to go for a walk in Ditan park. I'd just discovered how late the park opens when I suddenly heard a great cry. When I turned my head to see I found it was an old lady practicing her voice. And I'd thought it was someone screaming for their life. So I joined the old lady and we practiced together.

At six o'clock I ran into an old man who was hitting a tree while walking home. I thought it looked pretty interesting, so found a telephone pole and tried it too.

At seven in the morning I had breakfast at home. Because I was too lazy to do the dishes I just put the hot water right into the bag of noodles. They were cooked sooner than you'd think.

At eight in the morning I was exterminating bugs at home. A half hour later I found that the bugs hadn't died, but the spider in the bathroom had kicked the bucket.

At nine I was reading at home. A book I thought was about female consciousness and awakening turned out to move on from talking about feminism to talking about radical female supremacy.

At one in the afternoon I'd eaten and it was time for a rest. I don't remember when it was that I started preferring to sleep in the buff.

At three in the afternoon I went out to buy books; as I was getting ready to go back home I noticed someone had stuck a flyer in my bike. I took a look at it and found it was an ad for a fertility clinic!!! Jeez!

At five in the evening, my girlfriend called me up to invite me to her place for dinner, but I turned her down. The reason, she really just wanted to go out with her boyfriend, but couldn't leave her mother home alone.

In the evening, as the sun went down, it seemed as if it would be the end to the day's excitement, but my neighbors wouldn't let me calm down, I heard a sharp thumping sound and voices yelling "...your uncle!" at one another. I thought about going out and saying "Your uncles are both doing just fine; how about you guys calm down a bit."

I went to bed late, and won't bother describing that in detail. Unsuitable for children.

----Pinyin----

Língchén sān diǎn bàn wàichū pǎobù，chū le yī shēn chòu hàn，tóngjū mìyǒu tūrán xiǎng dǎ quán，yúshì zài huíjiā de lù shang yībiān hǎn yībiān liànxí（ màoshì tīng jiàn le xiǎohái zài kū，xiànzài de háizi qǐ de zhēn zǎo）

Língchén sì diǎn bàn zài jiā xǐzǎo shūfushūfu huó zhe de gǎnjué zhēn hǎo

Zǎoshang wǔ diǎn běn xiǎng qù dìtán sànbù，shéi xiǎode pò gōngyuán kāimén zhème wǎn，hū tīng yǒu rén dà hǎn “ āi ！ ！ ！” Huímóu yīkàn yuánlái shì wèi lǎotàitai zài liànshēng，bù zhīdào de hái yǐwéi shì zài hǎn jiùmìng ne，yúshì hū wǒmen hé lǎotàitai yīqǐ hǎn le qǐlai

Zǎoshang liù diǎn huíjiā de lù shang fāxiàn yī w [...]