Returning to the Dominican Republic to expedite her divorce from Kyle only reminds Amanda of how romantic her last trip there was, when she and Kyle were falling in love. Meanwhile, whatever scheme Rory has cooking seems to have sped up his timeline, so the smooth-talking gigolo routine needs to go into overdrive, too. Back in L.A., Kyle enlists Jennifer in his campaign to push Taylor into confessing her big secret about Christine, while Michael advises her against it. Michael, at least, seems to have given up his campaign to reunite with his ex, and spends every scene with Megan verbally abusing her while Coop looks increasingly constipated about it. Peter returns to Lexi seeming to have finally noticed what the rest of us have known all along: she's boring and she sucks. Speaking of "boring" and "sucks": THE SAM/BILLY/JENNIFER/JEFF QUADRANGLE, which is STILL HAPPENING GAAAAAAAH! Make yourself a tropical drink (heavy on the rum), and join us for our podcast on "Divorce Dominican Style"!

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🏝️ Fantasy Island (2021) S02.E13: "MJ Akuda & The 1st, 2nd, And 3rd Wives Club" on Hulu

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Just one more season of Melrose Place remains, but the podcast will live on. The question is: what show will we go through episode by episode after Melrose Place's Season 7 finale? We invited listeners JUST LIKE YOU to call and pitch your suggestions, and the time has come to listen and consider what the future may hold!

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🏛️ Maniac Mansion S03.E01: "The Long Hot Mansion" on YouTube

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Coop brings Megan to Philadelphia for the last phase of his job interview. Will she elude Larner's clutches? Michael can't keep the secret of Taylor's pregnancy, and neither can Jennifer. Once Kyle finds out, will he and Michael be able to test its paternity without letting Taylor find out the truth? Peter's stress level goes so far through the roof that the hospital's psychiatrist lends Peter his cabin to chill out. Will he remain chill once Michael follows him there? Rory is still working his angles with Amanda. Does she actually hate herself enough to let him? And Jennifer is getting increasingly territorial about Billy. Will she finally just tell him what Sam has actually been doing with Jeff, since Billy has somehow remained the very last carbon-based life form on Earth to find out? All these questions AND MORE are answered in the gigantic Season 6 finale, so get comfortable while our latest podcast tells you all about "M.P. Confidential" and "The Nasty Minded Professor"! (For the record, that's the show's missing hyphen between "Nasty" and "Minded," not ours.)

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🌺 Magnum P.I. S04.E08: “A Sense Of Debt” on Freevee

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Coop is still boring us all with talk of his big job in Philadelphia, and while Megan is still strongly considering joining him if he gets it, there's a problem: the head of the search committee is coming to town, and the restaurant where he wants to meet Coop and Megan happens to be in the hotel where Megan formerly worked. While this is weighing on Megan, her worst friend Jennifer pressures her to be more considerate of Michael, whose clinic is so deep in debt that he is openly considering burning it down for the insurance money. Coop's ex, meanwhile, runs into Rory, and old friend from Cleveland; once she finds out he's divorced, she immediately decides to set him up with Amanda, all the better to keep her away from Peter. Amanda really must be off her game, because she can't immediately clock Rory as a bounder. Kyle goes to Dallas to try to get more clues about what Nick was doing in L.A., and he does when his ex-landlady reveals that Taylor came to see him. Taylor tells Michael she thinks she's still concussed because she feels dizzy all the time; Michael's not a great doctor, but he does know all the tests that one should order for someone in Taylor's situation. The infidelity plot is MOSTLY just treading water, except that Jennifer tells Billy she loves him, and Jeff wants to introduce Sam to his whole family. We labored to bring you this podcast on "Four Affairs And A Pregnancy"!

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🖤 Her Costly Affair on YouTube

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Christine is still dead. Nick is still gone. And yet we're still hearing a lot about both of them. Amanda is so racked with guilt that she's taking it out on Kyle, whose attempts to bridge the gap between them all come out very hostile. Then Kyle gets a letter from Nick informing him that Taylor's dead, which she proves she is not by walking into the scene seconds later, but it still sends Kyle on an investigative journey into whom Christine had contact with in her last days, and why. Both the remaining blond doctors are annoying the (annoying) women in their lives with unilateral decisions about their living arrangements: Coop is up for a job in Philadelphia and assumes Megan will be overjoyed to move there with him if he gets it; Peter, having been back with Lexi for one date, buys her a condo on the marina. Michael and his clinic continue their downward spiral, though at least he has regular gossip updates from Taylor to distract him. Speaking of gossip, Megan happens to be leaving the complex just in time for Billy and Jennifer to return from their dalliance at the hotel; Jennifer tells her everything EXCEPT that Sam is also having an affair. Speaking of whom: it's all going great in San Diego until Jeff starts pressuring Sam to leave Billy and marry him, and though this scares Sam enough to really pour it on with Billy when she comes back to town, he both sees through her and is still extremely horny for Jennifer. It doesn't come with 12 long-stemmed roses, but we still think you'll like our podcast on "Too Romantic For Words"!

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🏨 Amanda's S01.E05: "My Cheatin' Staff" on YouTube

🏢 "4616 Melrose Place" (who lived where in the complex and when) at Fandom.com

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Having accidentally killed Christine in the last episode, Nick springs into action with a cunning plan, and drags Taylor along: they're going to call a suicide note in to Amanda at the hotel where she and Kyle are staying on their wedding night, then leave Christine on the tracks so that her corpse will be obliterated past the point where any physical evidence of Nick's actions can be determined. And it works, particularly as regards Taylor's agenda in the larger plan, because Amanda tries to conceal the suicide message from Kyle, then blames herself for her seeming part in Christine's death. And Kyle is so determined to get her past it that he even enlists Peter to convince Amanda that she's innocent before eventually deciding he agrees with her, actually. But the two surviving co-conspirators can't help turning on each other. Billy and Sam continue boring us all with their infidelity, though their respective co-cheaters do escalate their interest (but just a little -- the season's still got four more episodes to go!). Megan, Michael, Coop, and Lexi are also all in the episode, but if the producers don't care to bring them in sooner than three-quarters of the way through, and they're lucky we're mentioning them here at all. We stayed on track to bring you our podcast on "A Christine Runs Through It"!

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🚧 Suddenly Susan S04.E10: "The New Gate" for purchase on Prime Video

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Christine -- or should we say "Christine"? -- is ready to pull the plug on Operation Reset Kyle's Life, but Taylor and Nick have invested too much in it and simply will not allow that to happen. The next phase involves "Christine" confessing suicidal ideation to Peter so that he'll (a) commit her on a psych hold and (b) use all her professions of love to his own advantage with Amanda by telling Kyle and pushing him and Christine together. Unfortunately, Peter does only the first thing and very much not the second; in fact, he basically orders Kyle to leave Christine alone and marry Amanda as fast as he can -- which just requires Taylor to escalate the situation further. Here's what's not really escalating: anything between Billy and Sam OR the people who have crushes on them. Sam panics after sex with Jeff and tells him it absolutely cannot happen again. But Jeff is ready to throw away his whole career for her! Until she tells him not to and then he doesn't! Jennifer, meanwhile, continues mooning around Billy AND broom-dancing in her apartment, but none of that keeps her so busy that she can't get a mid-episode bob for no reason. And while Coop tries to get Lexi out of town, Megan helps Michael deal with an unexpected windfall. We're finding the comedy in "Blunt Drama"!

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❄️ Trapped: Buried Alive on YouTube

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Rob “Kyle McBride” Estes starred in a fourth-season Jump Streetepisode on illegal gambling, which featured verrrry long establishing shots; frequent PSAs about bookmaking; Penhall being a mediocre white guy; and a surprisingly winning turn from Estes. Special guest star Dustin Nguyen’s mall-sized blazer!

Yolanda Hadid just wanted to take her fellow Real Housewives on a nice visit her home country, The Netherlands. Unfortunately, Lisa Rinna was in the middle of being very concerned (or possibly “concerned”) about Kim Richards’s sobriety, and Kim was not having it. Cue one of the franchise’s most memorable fights!

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👮‍♂️ Watch 21 Jump Street S04.E02: Say It Ain't So, Pete on Peacock

🏠 The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills S05.E16: Amster-damn! on Peacock

🚪 It Sure Seems Like Lisa Rinna Has Been Fired From RHOBH at Gawker

🤺 Remembering The Most Epic Fight In RHOBH History on Primetimer

🧠 'FINALLY decoded the 'Lets not talk about the husband' comment' on Reddit

🤨 'What Lisa Rinna Really Thinks About Harry Hamlin's Affair Rumors' on TheThings

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So the last episode showed us that Christine was definitely alive; definitely wrote that letter years ago that Taylor apparently forgot about and had to go to Dallas to have Nick explain; and definitely was really injured in the war, she's also in cahoots with Nick, against Kyle. In this one, we're told that although money is apparently involved, and Christine doesn't feel great about her part in it, and this is also kind of a plan FOR Kyle, in the sense of rekindling his friendship with Nick? But other than that there is a plan, we don't know what it is, except that it involves Christine acting like she really needs a lot of attention from Kyle and is still constantly thinking about suicide -- and, honestly, how much acting is involved is an open question. As A plots go, we've had better! Moving on: Lexi has moved out of Peter's place, and (chastely) in with Coop. Megan is upset that Coop could throw her over so easily, so she heads straight back to Michael, and damn the danger of seeing him at the clinic. Peter, meanwhile, is upset that he's still being blamed for Thomas's death, and for some reason thinks Coop will help exonerate him. As Billy and Sam drift apart, Billy and Jennifer get close...on the dance floor! It's for a campaign Billy's working on, and it's also part of a campaign Jennifer's working on Billy. And that's our pitch for you to check out our podcast on "A Swing And A Mrs."!

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🥶 Cold Case S03.E11: "8 Years" on HBO Max

🦑 Maniac Mansion S03.E01: "The Long Hot Mansion"

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The time has come for a midseason two-parter, and new characters are popping off. Having mooched some extra ER shifts from Peter, Michael meets a shady gentleman (how shady? His name is Spider), who encourages Michael to revive the shuttered medical clinic in his neighborhood. Much as we were expected to believe that Michael doesn't know how strip clubs work, we're also expected to believe he doesn't understand the quid pro quo implied. Meanwhile, with Mrs. Mancini still in town, Jennifer has to keep asking Billy to pose as Craig -- and since Sam is still head over heels for Jeff, she has no problem giving Billy permission to do it and leave her alone, basically. And after Lexi's father Thomas suffers a health emergency in the middle of a conversation with Peter, Michael's ex-wife, Megan, stumbles secret knowledge about it that she wishes she never had. Mancinis: drama magnets! When Kyle and Christine have an awkward reunion that immediately resurrects Angry Kyle, Christine enlists Amanda to help her smooth things over. She does, in the hopes of giving the former couple a pleasant, healthy, and final goodbye, which unfortunately is not the result. All aboard: we've brought you a podcast on "Last Train To Baghdad"!

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👙 Baywatch S03.E10: "River Of No Return, Pt. 1" on Prime Video

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