All of You

Holding space is one of the most powerful and misunderstood relationship skills. In this episode, Shiv and Dave break down what emotional validation really is, why it’s what every partner wants when they are upset, and what makes it so hard to offer in the moment.

They explore the blocks to holding space, from personalizing and ego stories to emotional immaturity and share real examples from their own relationship around home, family, and navigating hard conversations without defensiveness. You’ll also learn practical tools for doing this well, like checking for capacity, getting clear on your own feelings first, and learning how to ask to be seen instead of fixed.

If you want deeper connection, more emotional safety, and fewer reactive cycles in your relationship, this episode is for you. 

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

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Family estrangement is one of the most painful and complex relationship experiences a person can walk through, and this episode approaches it with honesty, compassion, and deep care.

Dave shares his personal journey with family estrangement, what it has cost him, what it has taught him, and how he’s been able to create healthier relationships on the other side. Shiv and Dave explore estrangement from the perspectives of the parent, adult child, and sibling, and the emotional dynamics that often shape these ruptures.

The conversation unpacks why someone may choose distance, the grief that follows for everyone involved, and the critical importance of validating the hurt of the person who comes to you — because that validation can be the difference between preserving a relationship or losing it.

A grounded, tender episode about boundaries, repair, and the courage it takes to do family differently.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

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If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

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The New Year tends to arrive with a lot of pressure — to change faster, do more, fix everything, and somehow become a brand-new version of yourself overnight. In this episode, we slow the whole thing down and offer a different perspective on what this season is actually for.

We talk about why this time of year is better suited for rest, reflection, and intention than rigid goal-setting, and how many of the resolutions we’re taught to make are rooted in shame, comparison, and fear of being behind. When goals are chosen from self-criticism instead of self-connection, motivation becomes exhausting, failure feels personal, and trust in yourself slowly erodes.

Instead, we explore a more sustainable way of approaching growth — one that honors who you’ve been, gets honest about who you’re becoming, and allows your goals to come from alignment rather than pressure. If you’ve ever felt discouraged by resolutions, stuck in the same cycle year after year, or unsure what you even want next, this conversation will feel like a deep exhale.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

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The holidays are often framed as the happiest time of the year… but for many, they can also be the hardest. In this episode, Dave and Shiv talk honestly about why the holiday season can feel so heavy, from unmet expectations and family dynamics to grief, loneliness, and the invisible mental load—especially for women. Shiv shares why she used to dread the holidays, and together they explore what it’s like to navigate this season when you’re already on emotional thin ice. A real, compassionate conversation for anyone trying to hold space for what this time of year actually brings.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

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We talk a lot about the power of gratitude—but if it’s so good for us, why don’t we live there all the time? In this episode, we explore the blocks to gratitude and what actually gets in the way of feeling it, even when there’s so much to appreciate.

Using a real moment from the day after Disneyland, we unpack how easy it is to slip into shame and self-criticism—and how gratitude isn’t about bypassing the hard, but staying grounded in reality. We talk about how gratitude allows space for both the good and the hard to exist at the same time. Because when gratitude is embodied—not forced—it changes your energy, your perspective, and the way you show up in the world.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

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In this conversation, we explore one of the most surprising truths about personal development: the work you do for your relationship is the same work that transforms every part of your life. Relationships act like a mirror—showing you the patterns, wounds, and habits that quietly shape how you communicate, lead, set boundaries, and move through the world.

When you choose to grow inside your partnership, that growth follows you everywhere. Your career, your confidence, your spiritual life, your friendships… all of it gets upgraded when you start doing the inner work that creates safety, honesty, and emotional maturity at home.

In this episode, we talk about how healing relational patterns naturally spills into your work life, why breakthroughs in communication become breakthroughs in leadership and self-trust, and how tending to your inner world creates ripple effects you never expected.

If you’ve ever wondered why the hardest moments in your relationship also end up being the biggest catalysts for your evolution, this is the episode for you.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

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In this episode, we unpack the complicated relationship between trauma and growth—and why going through something hard isn’t what makes you stronger. We talk about the difference between experiencing trauma and actually healing from it, and Shiv opens up about how the saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” she was told in the wake of extreme loss did more harm than good.

We also dig into the way our upbringing shapes us, especially the belief that harshness builds resilience. (Spoiler: yelling doesn’t make kids stronger—it creates insecure attachment.) By looking at our childhood patterns with honesty and compassion, we can understand ourselves more clearly and choose a healthier path forward. It’s a tender, grounding conversation about growth without glorifying the pain that came before it.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allofyoupodcast/

In this episode, we’re getting honest about a pattern we didn’t expect to find in our own relationship: using personal growth tools in ways they were never meant to be used. We talk about how easy it is, once you’ve done a lot of healing and communication work, to slip into correcting, analyzing, or psychoanalyzing your partner — all under the guise of “using the tools.”

If you’ve ever caught yourself turning relationship tools as a weapon, this conversation will feel like a deep exhale.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allofyoupodcast/

This week we’re diving into the uncomfortable truth that not everyone is going to like you — and why that’s actually okay. We talk through our own experiences with rejection, wanting to be misunderstood, and the pressure to manage how people see you. It’s an honest, unstructured conversation about what it looks like to release that weight and stay grounded in who you are.

If you’ve ever felt the urge to shrink, shape-shift, or people-please your way into being liked, this one’s for you.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allofyoupodcast/

Ever feel totally fine… until your partner seems a little off? And suddenly you’re questioning yourself, replaying conversations, or wondering if you did something wrong? That’s outsourcing your self-worth — and most people don’t even realize they’re doing it.

In this episode, we break down why your partner’s mood or behavior can feel like it determines your value, how this pattern quietly shows up in relationships, and what it actually takes to stop letting someone else’s emotions dictate how you feel about yourself.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

If you’re ready to understand your own patterns, heal what’s underneath them, and create healthier relationships, we’d love to support you.

Work with Dave + find his course: https://stan.store/davemartinell

LOVE THE PODCAST? SUPPORT THE SHOW 🤍

If you love what we’re creating and want to be a part of keeping it going, you can support the show here!

STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allofyoupodcast/