All Purpose Cleaner

A few tips: if you think Ross’ is about to break-up with you, loan him your car, then steal it; if you think Kristin is about to break-up with you, join a cult; if you think Rob is about to break-up with you, move into his apartment complex. During this week’s episode of All Purpose Cleaner we discuss booty calls, You-Tube proposals, psycho ex near misses, and Pearl Jam chasers. It’s not you, it’s us.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Break-Ups Masters

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We blow the lid off of J. Edgar Hoover’s intimate involvement in one of histories greatest tragedies. We show you how your wii is contributing to the slow deliberate decline of Western civilization. We out one of America’s greatest statesmen. In other words, in this episode of All Purpose Cleaner we make ourselves the subjects of one of the largest terror investigations every mounted against a small town improv comedy troupe. If you don’t hear from us soon, be sure to forward all of our mail to “Weeping Funny Guys” at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Conspiracy Theories Master

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What ever happened to the golden age of television comedy? Who is the most annoying sitcom sidekick? When did Happy Days really “jump the shark”? Whose hotter Uncle Jesse John Stamos or ER John Stamos? What would Barbara Billingsley be like in the sack? Have you ever asked yourself these questions? Do you have many friends? Have you taken your medicine? Well regardless, if you have ever pondered the vicissitudes of laugh tracks or the narrative arc of Mallory and Skippy’s “no-mance” (copyright) then give our hilarious ramblings a listen.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Sit-Coms Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

And now for some advice that you can really use. And by “can really use” we mean of course “probably can’t effectively use at all” and “if you do use, we can be neither liable nor culpable”. In this crazy world we all need someone with whom to share our journey; and what better way to find that person then with a awkward pun about genitalia. In this edition of All Purpose Cleaner, we learn: what on-line dating, Photoshop, the AKC, and Robb all have in common; why you should probably bring a sewing kit to a date with Ami; why Ross lost his job as a field sobriety officer; and why Kristin still gets a little anxious when she logs onto her facebook account.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Pick-Up Lines Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

If you have ever come home to find your wife’s delicates in your sock drawer, after listening to this podcast you’ll knew whose ass to kick. If you have ever thought about doing something really mean to Kristin, after listening to this podcast you won’t. If you have ever received a moldy loaf of zucchini bread in the mail, after listening to this podcast you’ll know to whom to return it. If you have ever found a small, premixed and sealed tube of liquor in the pocket of you winter coat, after listening to this podcast you’ll know who to thank.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Pranks Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

So, you have woken up to discover that the world is over run by zombies. Naturally, the first thing you did was go to the internet to see what advice you could find from Roanoke, Virginia’s improv comedians. We don’t really care how you came to find out about us; we’re just glad you did. Here is our advice. First, if you are in the company of anyone under the age of 14 named Carl, kill him. We’ll wait. Second, if you are thinking about going to a Wal-Mart distribution center, don’t. Third, don’t even bother venturing into the nascent zombie porn genre which will have almost certainly begun to emerge by now; we already have the market cornered. So listen up, we just might save your life.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Zombies Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

We should start this one with a disclaimer, if you are a hard core video gamer, we apologize. You should still listen however, because nothing is funnier than a bunch of noobs talking about getting high scores on their Colecos and Intellivisions. (For the record, Burgertime kicked ass.) During this episodes of All Purpose Cleaner, Kristin tells of the tragedy that can befall a pixelated family, John confirms that his cell phone blows (hint, hint, potential sponsors), Ami confesses to an obsession, and Ross educates us all about the value of high quality health care. (Note: if you enter up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A we do the entire podcast naked.)

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Videogames Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

Looking for a friend’s side table, shaved barbie heads, used un-unmentionables, a broken player piano, a heavily annotated Trapper-Keeper, or a priced to move Thomas the Train table? Well if you are, have we got a deal for you. This week, the gang discuss their shared and moderately disturbing obsession with buying other peoples stuff.  It is a sad and funny confession. Also, if you listen to the whole podcast we promise that you will learn a great way to get great free crap in Raleigh, North Carolina. “What?”, you say. “Free crap! In Raleigh, North Carolina! Sign me up.” We shall friends; we shall.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Yard Sale Master

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If you are base jumping from Victoria Falls, kayaking through the Gauley River’s Lost Paddle Rapids, climbing up Nanga Parbat’s Rupal Face, or jumping a Segway over the Snake River Canyon; have we go the listening companion for you. In this week’s episodeof All Purpose Cleaner we discuss Daredevils and learn why: John takes out an insurance policy every time goes for a brisk jog, why Robb breaks into a cold sweat whenever he sees a headlamp, and why Ross is always careful about how he manages his blood sugar.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Daredevils Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discovery it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.

It’s been a little while since you heard from us, but now we are back with a vengeance. This week the guys get together to talk about crying to the Dowager Countess, hair product, evening attire, and Marley and Me; in other words Manhood. But don’t worry, its not as pathetic as it sounds, there’s always Ross.

Click the link below to listen.  WARNING- Adult Content.

Manhood Master

If you like All Purpose Cleaner why not help other people discover it by rating or commenting at the iTunes store or let us know by emailing us at [email protected] Thanks.