All We Cannot Say

Sexuality and disability are two subjects that Kirsten Schultz explores on her blog Chronicsex.org. Growing up with multiple illnesses, Kirsten had to navigate her sexuality in a world that had very little online resources for those with disabilities. Today, she creates safe spaces both online and offline for others to educate themselves, self-reveal, and find validation outside of an ableist mindset.

Experiencing pain during sex? It’s not just you - it might be vulvodynia. Chronic vulval pain is not something that’s so easily diagnosed, and in fact, many women don’t even realise they have it. But through searching forums online, Hope Kramer learned how to heal herself after Western Medicine failed to find a cure.

As the founder of the Sex Book Club in Sydney, Hope is on a mission to promote awareness of this debilitating syndrome, and encourage women to openly embrace their sexuality and emotional health.

Do 50% of all marriage really end in divorce? Is the marriage rate up, or is it down? It seems that the world is more and more confused about marriage now than ever before. Here’s what we do know - the average for marriage has risen from 18 to late 20s/early 30s, and Australians now favour long-term de factor relationships over exchanging rings.

And it’s the same for Americans too, with roughly 25% of US millennials taking a stroll down the aisle, according to research from the Pew Research Centre. That’s a big change from 72% back in 1962.

Which begs the question: why are we so pessimistic about marriage? And does this mean we’re also ambivalent about long-term romance?

In this episode, Erik Newtown of The Together Show talks to use about his life as a former divorce lawyer, and why co-creating a long-term relationship requires work.

A very personal monologue from Valencia in Spain. It’s the last episode of season one and this time I’m flying solo. Find out what I’ve been up to overseas for the past three months, the problems with travelling solo as a woman, beauty as a commodity, international Tinder culture, my first date with a polyamorist, co-living in Spain, attachment theory, and what’s up next for All We Cannot Say. Hint: it’s growing!

A sneak peak of an incredibly honest discussion about mental health in episode 10.

Here’s a startling and lesser known fact: bisexuals endure the worst mental health problems of anyone based on their sexuality. We’re prone to higher rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicidal thoughts, according to a 2012 report. All of this is distinct from homophobia, because a large amount of this prejudice comes from the rest of the rainbow community. In Episode 9, James Dominguez of the Bisexual Alliance Victoria talks to us about navigating your sexuality in a world that loves binaries, how to date a bisexual, bi-erasure and upping your bi-visibility, coming out at work and normalising your sexuality.

And we’re back. Here’s a sneak preview of episode #9, out Monday November 21. James Dominguez of Bisexual Alliance Victoria speaks to about bisexual erasure, bi-phobia, and why visibility is our most powerful tool in a heteronormative world.

Pierz Newton-John is a psychoanalyst and published author who teaches classes on love and relationships for the School of Life in Melbourne. In this episode, we talk about the danger of following your feelings, the unconscious mind and how it affects us day-to-day, the importance of people’s complexities, when the perfect time is to end a relationship, the biggest mistake people make when choosing partners, love languages, the anxiety of overwhelming choice in an age of dating apps, and of course, how to find and make love last.

A sneak preview of episode #8, out Monday October 24! Psychoanalyst and published author Pierz Newton-John teaches classes at The School of Life in Melbourne. His content focuses on how to make love last and includes lots of romantic myth busting.

Type in ‘relationship anarchy’ into Google and you’ll likely come across Mel Mariposa’s blog. Mel is a relationship counsellor  in Canada who specialises in coaching those who practice ethical non-monogamy. She helps them to redevelop, redefine and recreate their own emotional landscapes so that they can refine their relationship philosophies. The result is partnerships that are more in alignment with your own wants and needs, along with respecting other’s boundaries.