Alyssa Milano: Sorry Not Sorry

Deborah Tuerkheimer served for five years as an Assistant District Attorney in the New York County District Attorney's Office, where she specialized in domestic violence and child abuse prosecution. In her new book Credible: Why We Doubt Accusers and Protect Abusers, she provides a much-needed framework to explain how we perceive credibility, why our perceptions are distorted, and why these distortions harm survivors. Social hierarchies and inequalities foster doubt that is commonplace and predictable, resulting in what Tuerkheimer calls the “credibility discount”—our dismissal of claims by certain kinds of speakers—primarily women, and especially those who are more marginalized.

The #MeToo movement has exposed how victims have been badly served by a system that is designed not to protect them, but instead to protect the status quo. Credibility lies at the heart of this system. Drawing on case studies, moving first-hand accounts, science, and the law, Tuerkheimer identifies widespread patterns and their causes, analyzes the role of power, and examines the close, reciprocal relationship between culture and law—guiding us toward accurate credibility judgments and equitable treatment of those whose suffering has long been disregarded.

#MeToo has touched off a massive reckoning. To achieve lasting progress, we must shift our approach to belief. Credible helps us forge a path forward to ensuring justice for the countless individuals affected by sexual misconduct.

“This is not just an important book. It’s way more than that—it’s a new algorithm, an upending of long-held beliefs kept in place by law and culture. If we rewire ourselves to respond more fairly to the accusations that come our way, law reform and culture change will follow. Over time we can dismantle the credibility complex." —Elizabeth Lesser, bestselling author of Cassandra Speaks and Broken Open

“Deborah Tuerkheimer makes a brilliant, clear, and convincing legal case in Credible that justice for survivors requires basic changes in the law. But she makes an equally compelling plea for something with even more world-historical ambition: a transformation that is needed in the court of public opinion so that women’s dignity—and credibility—is finally seen as equal to men’s.” —Jackson Katz, PhD, educator and author of The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women and How All Men Can Help

“In Credible, Tuerkheimer tells a range of stories of victim-survivors of sexual assault and harassment. What’s different is that she traverses these stories through the lens of credibility—the ways in which its absence (or in rare cases, its presence) will make all the difference in someone’s recovery and healing. This is essential reading not only for those deeply invested in #MeToo activism and scholarship and for victim-survivors who will finally feel seen but also for anyone who has ever known a victim. Which is to say, Tuerkheimer’s book is essential reading for everyone.” —Donna Freitas, author of Consent: A Memoir of Unwanted Attention

On October 2nd, 2021, women and allies across the country marched in opposition to the attacks on women's reproductive freedom. Alyssa Milano spoke at the Los Angeles march. This is a recording of her speech.

Our guest this week is John Pavlovitz. John is a pastor, writer, and activist from Wake Forest, North Carolina. He’s spent nearly three decades teaching, studying, dissecting, deconstructing, and reconstructing the Christian faith. His new book If God Is Love, Don’t Be a Jerk invites us to re-examine the modern faith community and ask if it is as loving as it should be.

Imagine for a moment what the world might look like if we as people of faith, morality, and conscience actually aspired to this mantra.

What if we were fully burdened to create a world that was more loving and equitable than when we arrived?

What if we invited one another to share in wide-open, fearless, spiritual communities truly marked by compassion and interdependence?

What if we daily challenged ourselves to live a faith that simply made us better humans?

John Pavlovitz explores how we can embody this kinder kind of spirituality where we humbly examine our belief system to understand how it might compel us to act in less-than-loving ways toward others.

This simple phrase, "Thou Shalt Not Be Horrible," could help us practice what we preach by creating a world where:

In If God Is Love, Don't Be a Jerk, John Pavlovitz examines the bedrock ideas of our religion: the existence of hell, the utility of prayer, the way we treat LGBTQ people, the value of anger, and other doctrines to help all of us take a good, honest look at how the beliefs we hold can shape our relationships with God and our fellow humans—and to make sure that love has the last, loudest word.

We talk a lot on this podcast about the importance of using whatever platforms we have to make the world a better place. Those of us with large platforms, especially, have a responsibility to use them. Our guest this week is certainly using his. Adrian Grenier is an actor, filmmaker, musician, entrepreneur and philanthropist who came to prominence as Vincent Chase in the hit show Entourage.

As an investor, Adrian has backed companies and entrepreneurs that he believes can change the world for the better. DuContra looks to invest in companies that create positive change by adhering to Sustainable Development Goals established by the United Nations, and is committed to achieving a better and more sustainable future for all.

At DuContra, the investment strategy is focused on matters that encourage Human Flourishing, such as psychedelics, mental health, sustainable consumption and Communitas (wellness retreats + community building). Here are some of his takes on how we can make wiser investments to make a better impact on people and our planet: https://www.instagram.com/p/CGXUfGwHNXw/

As an activist, Adrian has founded the Lonely Whale Foundation, dedicated to bringing people closer to the world's oceans through education and awareness, inspiring empathy and action for ocean health and the wellbeing of marine wildlife.

He is also a UN Ambassador where he helped the UN Environment Programme launch Clean Seas, a campaign to end marine plastic pollution. He is also the host for Nat Geo's documentary series The Last Drop, a documentary on how we can conserve water and ensure sustainable water supplies in the future.

There is a masculinity crisis in America. Men are taught to suppress emotions, creating a world where not only are women harmed, but men as well. Justin Baldoni is working to change that, and joins us to discuss. Justin is an actor who many will know from his starring role as Raphael on Jane the Virgin. He is also a director, producer, entrepreneur and changemaker whose efforts are focused on creating impactful media and entertainment. Baldoni is the co-founder of Wayfarer Studios, an independent financial and production engine pioneering purpose-driven, multi-platform film and television productions that elevate and speak to the human spirit.

Schools are getting back in session for the third academic year impacted by COVID-19. To discuss this, along with the weaponization of education and educators by right-wing political forces, critical race theory, and more, we’ve invited Sari Beth Rosenberg on the show. Sari is a public high school teacher in Manhattan, whose career was originally due to start on September 11th, 2001. She is a frequent host of online programming for PBS Newshour, the advisor of Feminist Eagles, a feminist student organization and a sought out expert on all things education.

Around the world, the Covid pandemic is as deadly as ever. Vaccines are widely available in some countries, and completely out of reach to others. Here at home, tens of millions are refusing to take the vaccine, violent protests are erupting at school board meetings and even children’s hospitals against mask mandates, and more than 630,000 Americans have died from the disease.

To discuss all of this, we’ve invited Dr. Peter Hotez back on the show. Dr. Hotez is an infectious disease specialist and Dean for the National School of Tropical Medicine at Baylor College of Medicine. He and Alyssa Milano have worked together around the world for years, and he is one of the leading experts in preventing infectious diseases.

This year brought so many changes to America, most notably the arrival of the Joe Biden administration. We often look at the first 100 days of a new presidency as a measuring stick for how effective the president will be, and Joe Biden’s were impressive. To take a deep dive into what the early part of this presidency revealed, we’ve invited Kelly Hyman on the show. Kelly is a former actress turned lawyer, a frequent legal and news analyst, and the author of the new book Build Back Better: The First 100 Days of the Biden Administration, and Beyond.