ASAP RAPS

ASAP RAPS

By ASAP RAPSComedyArtsMusicPerforming Arts
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ASAP RAPS episodes

  • Album 1, Track 4a: ASAP Rap Snacks
    Pump up your Reeboks and get your pinnies out because this week Wertz and Stoops are gonna dunk on you.
    This week, the gang’s all here: Patrick Ewing, Clyde Drexler, Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Karl Malone, John Stockton, Potato Chips, Pumpkin Spice, Mello Yellow Conspiracies, The Meters, Mayor Wertz, and P.Stoops. All of them going for the gold medal in Synchronized Podcasting.
    Recommended listening:
    Broken Bells, ‘Broken Bells’
    Preservation Hall Jazz Band, ‘So It Is’
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 13 min
  • Album 1, Track 3b: Mariska
    It’s called ASAP Raps. Kids try it at parties, next thing they know they’re online, gettin’ paid to yell at their own genitals.
    County prosecutors Stoops and Wertz put bad audience members on trial, discuss legal gambling rings, and have a sidebar with Law & Order: SVU. Will they finish the rap? Will Stoops waste too much time improvising a scene of Wertz kissing his girlfriend? Objections? Overruled.
    Executive Producer
    Dick Wolf
    Recommended listening:
    ITEM, ‘Sad Light’
    Milo, ‘A Toothpaste Suburb’
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 22 min
  • Album 1, Track 3a: Goober Beats
    We don’t gotta podcast, we making money beats.
    This week Wertzy brings in energy drinks and we get totally NOS’d out of our mind. On our NOS-fueled bender we take a deep dive into Civil War era novelty songs and dumb history records.
    Recommended listening:
    Washed Out, ‘Mister Mellow’
    Cardi B, “Bodak Yellow”
    Scallops Hotel, “Lavender Chunk”
    Shlava, “Groundislava”
    Flying Lotus, “Putty Boy Strut”
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 32 min
  • Album 1, Track 2b: Oprah
    You get an episode! And you get an episode! And YOU get an episode!
    This week’s episode of rap-writing was inspired by America’s #1 person and #1 movie and we try our hardest to not get weird with it. But, we assure you, we do actually get to writing the raps. No more goofing around. We talk Groupon, Amber alerts, and start writing our pitch for a multi-camera sitcom.
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 16 min
  • Bonus Episode #1: I’m a perv, I’ll look that up
    We got really sidetracked in conversation and didn’t get around to writing the lyrics until about two hours into recording. So instead of dumping a three hour episode on you all, we’re giving you this bonus episode! We talk about sex tapes, Sex and the City, and sex sounds. It’s a real horny episode, so have fun listening to this at work.
    This week’s suggested listening:
    Run The Jewels, ‘Run The Jewels 3’
    Mitch Hedberg, ‘Do You Believe In Gosh?’
    Giorgio Moroder, ‘From Here To Eternity’
    Mort Garson, ‘Plantasia’
    Email us at: [email protected] 
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 6 min
  • Album 1, Track 2a - Piss on the Beats
    It’s our second beat and our blood runs cold, our integrity has just been sold.
    We’re back to making beats in this week episode and, boy oh boy, do we get handed a GARBAGE record. Apart from the absolute TRASH record we have to sample, we explore Wertz’s obsession with Toto, the future of live podcasts and rib cook-offs, but mostly Stoops curses at a record for an hour.     
    This week’s suggested listening:   
    Open Mike Eagle, ‘Brick Body Kids Still Daydream’    
    The Books, ‘The Lemon of Pink’    
    Aesop Rock, ‘The Impossible Kid’    
    Toto, “Africa”    
    Email us at: [email protected]  
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast 
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 25 min
  • Album 1, Track 1b - Hoda
    Matthew Broderick killed two people in 1987 and then made Godzilla 2000.
    In our first lyrics episode we explore the spectrum of aggressive music, attempt to find non-murder-related People magazine covers, and write a rap about losing your gloves. Really, the takeaway from this episode is that Matthew Broderick killed two people.
    This week’s suggested listening:
    Eddie Logix, ‘Ohana’
    Memory Cassette, ‘Call & Response’
    Jimmy Eat World, ‘Futures’
    Mindless Self Indulgence, ‘Frankenstein Girls Will Seem Strangely Sexy’
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 21 min
  • Album 1, Track 1a - Beats of Future Past
    Put on your best track suit because it’s ASAP Rappin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo!
    In our first beat episode we dive into the world of acid rock with Numero Group’s “Warfaring Strangers: Acid Nightmares,” talk about X-Men movies we haven’t seen, and then scramble to finish as we got overconfident in how much time we had. Lessons are learned.
    This week’s suggested listening:
    Ace Marino, ‘Cocaine Flamingo’
    Doseone, ‘High Hell Soundtrack’
    Beastie Boys, ‘Hello Nasty’
    Blood Orange, ‘Freetown Sound’
    Email us at: [email protected]
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 18 min
  • Introduction
    Pull that podcast off the shelf and allow us to introduce ourselves, we're ASAP RAPS!
    It's our introductory episode and we talk about our background, lay out the surprisingly complex rules and regulations, and then write our theme song based on the tweets of our podcast heroes: Greg Proops and Justin McElroy.
    Email us at: [email protected]    
    Follow us on Twitter: @asaprapspodcast   
    Like our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/asaprapspod/
    1 hr 17 min

About ASAP RAPS

From the publisher's feed

In ASAP RAPS, turntablist p.stoops and rapper Mayor Wertz attempt to write rap songs quickly. Very quickly. Some might say “too quickly” or “maybe you should stop." But there’s no time for critics in this race for the rhymes.