Aware And Prepared

Ever say yes before you've even had a chance to ask yourself what you want? That isn't a character defect. It's your nervous system doing exactly what it was trained to do. In this episode, Mandi sits down with Gayle Dargel, LMFT, a therapist and professor, to reframe people-pleasing as a nervous system response, not a personality trait.

Gayle explains the fawn response, hypervigilance, and why complex trauma can make even good moments feel dangerous, and how codependency can start long before we have words for it. Mandi opens up about walking on eggshells in her abusive marriage and rediscovering who she was after leaving. If you've ever felt empty, depleted, or unsure who you are outside of keeping everyone else happy, this conversation offers real hope and practical steps for reconnecting with yourself.

RESOURCES

Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Miller on Amazon - Book Gayle recommends on how codependency shows up in early childhood development.

Connect with Gayle Dargel:

• WEBSITE: GayleDargelTherapy.net - Coaching, somatic therapy (for individuals in California), blog, and contact page. 
• INSTAGRAM: @the.spiritual.therapist
• BOOK: The Magic in Your Heart - Amazon and Barnes & Noble. 
• PODCAST: Soul Recovery - Apple and YouTube

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

APPROXIMATE TIMESTAMPS

[01:20] People-pleasing: nervous system response, not character trait

[01:37] Fight or flight, anxiety, and hypervigilance 

[03:50] Walking on eggshells: Mandi's domestic violence experience 

[04:05] Self-abandonment and "Wait, who am I?" after leaving

[05:04] Gayle's story: keeping the peace as a child imprint

[06:00] Life after healing: the pendulum swing and feeling safe

[07:52] The fawn response: becoming the other person 

[9:38] Neuroception and the window of tolerance 

[10:15] False windows of tolerance: work, food, substances 

[12:17] Complex trauma: "walking in a spider web" 

[15:00] What codependency really is 

[16:20] Family roles: the hero and the enabler 

[19:28] How to move forward: feeling feelings and building new sense of self 

[23:24] Distress tolerance and staying connected to yourself 

[26:15] Gayle's book, The Magic in Your Heart, and her IG, site and podcast 

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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Why prevention starts when kids are three and four years old, what parents need to know about alcohol and hyper-masculine spaces, how groomers manipulate kids online, and why the most uncomfortable five-minute conversation you'll ever have with your teen could protect them for life. 

Whether you're raising daughters, sons, any gender kids or students, this episode with Liz Ortenburger, CEO of SafeNest, Nevada's largest nonprofit addressing domestic and sexual violence, gives you real tools to raise kids who won't become victims or perpetrators, without ever blaming survivors.

RESOURCES

• SafeNest - Nevada's largest and most comprehensive nonprofit addressing domestic and sexual violence. Offers about 70 classes, virtual and in-person, for parents, young people, and survivors. 
• National Domestic Viol. Hotline TheHotline.org
• Previous Episode: The Cornell Seven: 4 Patterns Behind Campus Sexual Assault - Last episode on victim blaming, DARVO, institutional betrayal, and power and control
• Previous Episode: Teaching Kids Boundaries - Teaching Kids Boundaries / Prevention Skills Boundaries curriculum for young children

Connect with SafeNest:

• Website: SafeNest.org
• Social Media: Instagram @SafeNestLV and FB @SafeNestTADC

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

[00:00] Intro and Liz's background at SafeNest 

[04:00] Alcohol, hyper-masculine spaces, and prepping kids for college

[07:00] Consent, boundaries, and the study on college rapists (Cornell 7)

[11:00] Teaching bodily autonomy early: no forced hugs 

[14:00] What makes a safe person, believe kids / Larry Nassar example

[16:30] Safe vs. grooming: red flags online 

[20:00] Group dynamics and vetting your kid's friend group 

[22:30] Dads, rescuing, and raising strong, independent girls 

[25:00] The five-minute uncomfortable conversation about healthy sex 

[27:30] SafeNest classes and resources 

[29:00] Trauma, delayed reporting, and car conversations with kids 

[31:00] How boys can creatively step in as bystanders 

[33:30] Close and where to find SafeNest

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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The Cornell Seven didn’t come out of nowhere. Situations like this are built, and the patterns behind them show up on campuses again and again. 

Mandi, certified victim advocate, breaks down the four patterns that build it. Drawing on her college keynotes on ending victim blaming, Mandi also shares how men can step in as allies instead of protectors, how to start these conversations with your partner and kids, and a message for survivors “I am Jane Doe” who are finding the headlines hard right now.

RESOURCES

• @ A Call to Men - Instagram account helping men learn to be allies and help prevent violence against women
  
  
• @ Hassl - Instagram account sharing how men can be better allies
  
  
• RAINN.org - sexual assault helpline
  
  
• Previous Episode: Ending Victim Blaming, Creating Safer Communities - key points shared from Mandi’s college keynote / what students actually shared
  
  
• Previous Episode: Masculinity with Dr. Saeed - Dr. Saeed shares how he stepped in safely using curiosity
  
  
• Previous Episode: Safe Bystander Intervention with Kelly of Peer Praxis - How to safely intervene when something feels wrong
  
  
• Previous Episode: Teaching Kids Boundaries - How to talk with young kids about consent and boundaries, including the "Hulk smash" story
  
  
• Previous Episode: Complex PTSD and Healing - Mandi shares the tools that help her

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

APPROXIMATE TIMESTAMPS

[02:40] What happened and why the reaction has been so big 

[7:08] Victim blaming, and why consent to one thing is not consent to everything 

[9:45] DARVO: deny, attack, reverse victim and offender 

[10:53] Institutional betrayal: Only 7 expulsions out of 1,200+ reports 

[14:02] Boundaries, Entitlement

[15:15] Silence is harm. Intervene!

[16:02] How men can be allies, not protectors (resources)

[17:58] How to talk about this with family and kids 

[20:56] A message for survivors

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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GREAT platform for navigating relational harm and for survivors navigating co-parenting after abuse. Anne shares how Aimee Says (AI platform) can help spot coercive control, document patterns for legal and custody proceedings, and lighten the mental load that comes with every notification. You'll also hear how popular co-parenting apps fit into the picture, what privacy protections survivors should look for in AI tools, and why reducing the impact on your nervous system is part of healing, especially for those living with complex PTSD.

Post-separation abuse often continues through co-parenting messages, custody disputes, and the constant pressure of documenting every incident, all while your nervous system is still in survival mode.

Listen in, lighten your load, and share with others!

RESOURCES

• Aimee Says - AI support platform for survivors of relationship abuse that helps document co-parenting experiences and recognize abusive patterns.
• Aimee Detects - Aimee Says tool that turns your communication records into evidence. 
• OurFamilyWizard - Co-parenting communication app often mandated by courts that creates a permanent record of messages.
• TalkingParents - Co-parenting communication app that keeps a secure, unalterable record of exchanges between co-parents.

Connect with Anne Wintemute:

• Website: AimeeSays.com
• Instagram: @aimeesaysdv
• LinkedIn: Anne Wintemute 

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

Approximate Timestamps

[00:00] Introduction to Anne Wintemute and Amy Says

[02:08] How AimeeSays supports survivors and co-parenting

[04:01] Privacy stance and data security in AI tools

[06:49] Overview of co-parenting apps and Aimee Detects

[09:57] Using Aimee Detects to analyze communication records

[12:37] Impact of trauma and complex PTSD on survivors

[16:48] Softening the bull ride: reducing trauma impact

[20:46] Integrating AI with existing co-parenting apps

[26:36] Advice for using AI tools in co-parenting and legal contexts

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

Send me a message

How do you know if someone you love is thinking about suicide, and what do you actually say if they are? For Suicide Awareness Month, Mandi welcomes back returning guest Diane Andre Acuna, a speaker and burnout prevention specialist trained in suicide intervention for a conversation most people are afraid to have.

Diane breaks down the real warning signs (hint: it's not what you think), the exact language to use instead of "commit suicide," how to ask someone directly if they're thinking about it (even a child), and when to call 988 versus 911. Whether you're a parent, a teacher, or just someone who wants to be a safe person for the people in your life, this episode gives you the words and the confidence to have this conversation before it's too late.

RESOURCES

• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline - Call or text 988 to reach a trained crisis counselor; can connect you to local resources and a safety plan.
  
  
• LivingWorks - The suicide prevention training with programs: safeTALK teaches how to recognize signs and do a warm handoff to help / ASIST (applied suicide intervention skills training) trains people to directly ask about suicide and intervene

Connect with Diane Andre Acuna:

• WEBSITE: DianneAndree.com - Free download on how to start your day off well; also where to inquire about bringing safeTALK or ASIST training to your organization. 
  
  
• LINKEDIN: Diane Acuna Andree - Weekly "Tuesday Tip" posts for a daily micro-reset.
   
• INSTAGRAM: @Diandree7

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
  
  
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
  
  
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
  
  
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 Introduction and guest background

02:13 Personal experiences with mental health and trauma

04:25 Training and resources in suicide prevention

07:12 Signs to look for in teenagers and children

11:14 Recognizing giving away possessions and verbal cues

17:28 How to approach someone showing warning signs

21:26 Handling disclosures and direct questions

26:18 The importance of a safety net and involving others

30:54 Resources, follow-up, and community support

34:40 The aftercare and ongoing support process

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In this follow-up to last week's episode on Complex PTSD vs PTSD, Mandi breaks down what's actually happening in the brain during hypervigilance, and more importantly, what to do about it.

Pulled from a keynote Mandi recently delivered to a mastermind group titled "Leading Beyond Hypervigilance," this episode walks through the neuroscience behind hypervigilance and hustle mode (parts of the brain affected most), three simple nervous system tools you can use anywhere, two breathing techniques, and Mandi's personal self-care menu she encourages listeners to create for themselves. Whether you're leading a team or just trying to lead yourself out of survival mode, this episode gives you real, practical tools, not just another reminder to relax.

RESOURCES

• Calm App - App Mandi uses for grounding sounds like ocean waves and daily calm practices. 
• Previous Episode: Complex PTSD vs. PTSD - Last week's episode explaining the difference between PTSD and complex PTSD.
• Previous Episode: Panic Attack Tools For Relief with Tom - Referenced episode on what happens in the body during a panic attack and what to do about it. 

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

02:07 Understanding Hypervigilance in the Brain

03:14 Trauma and the Brain's Overactive Alarm System

04:14 Fueling Hustle Mode and Its Roots in Trauma

05:20 The Importance of Asking for Help

06:07 Symptoms and Costs of Hypervigilance

07:01 Signs of Hypervigilant Leadership

08:12 Brain Parts Affected by Trauma

09:45 Neuroplasticity and Healing the Brain

12:55 The Nervous System and Its Role in Safety

14:30 Nervous System Tools: Body, Breath, Environment

17:52 Grounding Techniques: Body, Senses, and Environment

18:32 Breath Techniques for Regulation

20:34 Supporting Yourself with Environment and Self-Care

21:00 Small Steps and Self-Compassion

23:36 Building a Self-Care Menu

29:45 Summary and Resources for Further Support

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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What is complex PTSD, and how is it different from PTSD? As a complex PTSD survivor herself, Mandi breaks down the real distinction in this episode, timed around Complex PTSD Awareness Day (September 2nd). 

Mandi shares what invisible struggles actually look like in the workplace, the brain science behind hypervigilance, and her PEACE framework for rebuilding trust in your own intuition. Whether you're managing a team, supporting someone you love, or recognizing pieces of your own story, this one gives you the language and the tools to respond with acknowledgement, compassion, and consistency instead of confusion.

RESOURCES

• The Mend Project - Clarity for people navigating interpersonal and domestic violence.
  
  
  
• Amy Says - A platform helping people navigate relationship harm
  
  
  
• Previous Episode: Neuroplasticity and Healing with Dr. Keean - Neuroplasticity
  
  
  
• Previous Episode: Anxiety and Panic Attacks with Tom - Panic attacks and anxiety 
  
  
  
• Previous Episode: Tracy Mathison, Project Beloved - Soft environments

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

[03:00] PTSD and Complex PTSD Awareness

[03:27] The rip current metaphor for complex PTSD 

[05:10] PTSD vs. complex PTSD 

[07:15] How C-PTSD shapes identity and brain processes differently

[09:42] What this looks like day-to-day at work: top signs

[10:52] Panic attacks, defensiveness, and trauma responses

[12:23] The brain science: amygdala, hypothalamus, fight/flight/freeze/fawn 

[13:23] Hypervigilance and the restaurant choking story 

[14:19] Three foundations: acknowledgement, compassion, consistency 

[15:32] Resources: The Mend Project and Amy Says 

[16:20] Why affirmations backfire, and adding curiosity to affirmations

[16:50] The PEACE framework for trusting intuition 

[19:03] Language for checking in on someone 

[20:03] Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) 

[22:33] Softer physical environments, supportive phrases, consistency

[25:00] Great news: brains do heal!

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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I can't tell you how many people disclose past assaults to me once they hear what I do for a living. EVERY SINGLE TIME it was someone they knew. In this episode, Mandi breaks down the "red zone," the stretch from move-in day through Thanksgiving break when first-year college students are statistically most likely to experience sexual assault, including the stat that 73% of victims know their attacker.

If you have a kid heading off to college, this one's for you. Mandi shares her PEACE framework for trusting your intuition, why boundaries and people-pleasing matter more than "stranger danger," and 22 practical tips for staying safer this fall (for college students or anyone really!).

RESOURCES

RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) - The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization; created and operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline. rainn.org 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

Previous Episodes: Project Beloved episode with Molly Jane's mother and Boundaries For Kids With Sydney and Lacye

PEACE Framework - Mandi's framework for trusting your intuition, taught in her workshops. Take the quiz to see how well you are trusting your intuition

In-Person Safety Workshop in San Diego on September 15, 2026

CONNECT WITH MANDI

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS
[01:00] Last week's episode about Molly Jane’s murder and legacy with Project Beloved
[03:00] The red zone explained; three key stats from RAINN
[05:30] Why boundaries and people-pleasing matter more than "stranger danger"
[07:30] What age to start these conversations
[09:00] Mandi’s in person workshop September 15, 2026
[10:30] Two sources of harm: strangers vs. acquaintances
[11:30] 22 Safety Tips Every College Freshman Needs to Know
[32:00] Recap and join the email list to get each week’s episode

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

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What if the room a survivor is asked to sit in after a sexual assault could make the difference between being believed and being dismissed? 

Mandi sits down with Tracy Matheson, founder of Project Beloved, to talk about the soft interview rooms her nonprofit builds inside police departments across the country and why trauma-informed environments change outcomes for survivors and investigations alike.

Tracy shares the story behind Project Beloved's founding and its two core programs: the soft interview rooms that make reporting less traumatic, and the Beloved Bundles that help survivors walk out of hospitals with dignity after a forensic exam. It's a conversation about grief, advocacy, and what real systemic change can look like.

RESOURCES

Connect with Tracy Matheson:

• Website: ProjectBeloved.org
• Instagram and Facebook
• LinkedIn: Tracy Matheson 

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

[03:00] What a soft interview room is and why it matters

[08:00] The elements that make a room trauma-informed

[13:00] Tracy shares her daughter, Molly Jane's story

[17:30] Why Project Beloved waits for law enforcement agencies to come to them

[22:00] How Tracy's soft interview room idea is confirmed by forensic psychologist

[25:00] How the nonprofit is funded and how they support survivors

[29:00] The Beloved Bundle: clothing and hygiene kits for survivors at hospital or PD

[34:00] Megan Guttrum's became the next victim and failures that let the perpetrator escalate

[37:00] Follow Project Beloved 2.0 to see the interview rooms, bundles and see how to support

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

Send me a message

What if the best time to prevent abuse and assault isn't high school, but preschool? Lacey and Sydney from the Arkansas Coalition Against Sexual Assault join the show to talk about the Butterfly Effect Program, a curriculum built for kids as young as three that teaches boundaries, consent (using kid-friendly language like "permission"), emotional regulation, and how to identify a safe adult, not just a trusted one.

This episode breaks down how early prevention education actually works in the classroom, why the word "no" isn't mean, and how parents and teachers can bring these same lessons home through an eight-book series designed for any family, anywhere.

RESOURCES

• Butterfly Effect Program Website - The book series discussed in this episode, teaching prevention skills to children ages 3 to 8.
• Butterfly Effect Program YouTube Channel with songs
• Facebook: Arkansas Coalition Against Sexual Assault 

Connect with Mandi:

• Website: WomenAwareAndPrepared.com
• Take the Free Intuition Quiz WomenAwareAndPrepared.com/Quiz
• Instagram: @WomenAwareAndPrepared
• LinkedIn: Mandi Pratt

TIMESTAMPS

[04:00] Why prevention education needs to start in preschool 

[07:30] The eight lessons: empathy, boundaries, rejection, and permission 

[11:00] The Hulk smash story: teaching kids that "no" isn't mean 

[15:00] People-pleasing conditioning and how it connects to victimization 

[18:00] Getting parents and teachers involved through take-home newsletters 

[22:00] Safe adult vs. trusted adult 

[25:00] Secrets versus surprises and the somatic connection 

[28:00] The Butterfly Effect book series for homeschool families and beyond 

[32:00] YouTube channel, the Boundary Bubble Song, and where to find their resources and social media

The primary purpose of the Women Aware and Prepared Podcast is to educate and inform. This podcast series does not constitute advice or services. Please use common sense for your own situation.

Send me a message