In today’s episode, we’re diving into a powerful truth: the health of your marriage often comes down to what you choose to focus on. It’s easy to fixate on what’s not working, letting small annoyances grow into mountains of frustration. But what if the key to deeper connection and lasting joy is found in a simple but radical posture—gratitude?

We’ll explore how contentment isn’t resignation, but an intentional choice to see the blessings amidst the imperfections. You’ll hear honest reflections on prioritizing your spouse, the life-giving role of quality time, and how to navigate conflict in ways that build satisfaction, not resentment. Whether you're newly married or decades in, this conversation is a fresh reminder that gratitude, not settling, is the foundation of a thriving Christian marriage.

Episode highlights:

Feeling content in marriage is different from settling.

There’s a way to work through conflict that makes both spouses feel more satisfied.

Healthy conflict resolution is one of the strongest predictors of marriage satisfaction. 

Silent discontentment leads to resentment that erodes at the foundation of your marriage. 

The key is finding solutions that honor both spouses perspectives.

Questions to reflect:

1. What are three things about our marriage that you’re grateful for right now?
2. Are there any small annoyances in our relationship that we’ve let build up? How can we address them gently and respectfully?
3. How can we be more intentional about choosing each other—especially in the areas where our preferences or personalities differ?

Quotes from today’s episode:

“I found myself focusing on the things that weren’t working in my marriage instead of thinking about the things that were.”

“Small annoyances can grow into mountains of frustration”

“Settling comes from a place of resignation”

“Contentment flows from gratitude, an intentional choice we make.”

“Contentment says I see the imperfections in our marriage but I choose to focus on the blessings.”

“Nancy comes before my personal preferences.”

“The key word is choice.”

“Have a posture of gratitude while understanding there is room for growth.”

“Quality time is oxygen for your marriage”

"There’s a way to work through conflict that makes both spouses feel more satisfied."

Mentioned in this episode:

• Use our Marriage Reframing Challenge to change your perspective about your spouse and/or your marriage. 

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you intentionally choose to pursue the marriage God intended, find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Try this FREE YouVersion plan: 5 Marriage Lies to Defeat with Biblical Truth

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. 

In this deeply honest and hope-filled conversation, Justin and Trisha Davis open up about their journey through love, ministry, and the real struggles that nearly tore their marriage apart—including infidelity and hidden personal battles. With vulnerability and wisdom, they share how counseling, truth-telling, and taking ownership became the turning points in their healing.

Trisha shares what it looked like to face the pain of betrayal trauma, while Justin reflects on the overwhelming guilt and the hard road to forgiveness. Together, they unpack how our stories, the words spoken over us, and the lies we believe about our worth can deeply affect how we show up in relationships.

But this isn’t just a story about pain—it’s a story about redemption. About the power of grace, the courage it takes to grieve and heal, and the choice to believe that real transformation is possible.

More than behavior change, they point to the heart—the deep, inner work that allows us to discover who we really are and who God has created us to be. Their story is a beautiful reminder that no matter how broken things may feel, healing and hope are always within reach.

Episode highlights:

• Rock bottom is still a solid surface to stand when you come alongside Christ.

• Intimacy is to be fully known and know that we're fully loved.

• You never cause someone to have an affair.

• The truth sets you free because it doesn't give any room for the enemy.

• Excavating our past helps us understand our present.

• Redemptive pain can lead to growth.

• Healthy relationships require vulnerability and trust.

• Transformation comes from God's grace and our choices.

Questions for reflection:

1. What small, everyday choices are we making in our marriage that could either be building connection—or slowly creating distance?

2. Are there areas of hiddenness in our relationship—past wounds, unspoken frustrations, or shame—that we need to bring into the light?

3. What does forgiveness look like in our relationship right now?

Quotes from today’s episode:

• "I had to choose to be a truth teller myself."

• "You never cause someone to have an affair."

• "I believed I have to be perfect to be loved."

• "You can't today, but God still has a plan."

• "Healing is hard, but then it's worth it."

• "You are not as stuck as you think you are."

• "You have to stop gaslighting yourself to grieve."

• "The heart of the book is about what God can do."

Mentioned in this episode:

• Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn't Good Enough by Justin & Trisha Davis

• RefineUs Ministries Helping people experience transformation by building healthy, authentic relationships.

• Find Justin and Trisha on Instagram

• Use our Marriage Reframing Challenge to change your perspective about your spouse and/or your marriage. 

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you intentionally choose to pursue the marriage God intended, find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Try this FREE YouVersion plan: 5 Marriage Lies to Defeat with Biblical Truth

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to . receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In this special Mother’s Day episode, Dr. Kim Kimberling sits down with bestselling author Melanie Shankle to talk about her latest book, Here Be Dragons. Together, they unpack the complexities of generational trauma and explore what it means to break old cycles in order to build a new legacy of healthy relationships. It’s a conversation that’s honest, refreshing, and full of humor. Whether you're a mother or not, this episode has something for you!

Episode highlights include: 

• Generational trauma affects emotional growth and relationships.

• Self-worth can be deeply impacted by parental relationships.

• Humor can be a coping mechanism for deeper issues.

• Recognizing unhealthy patterns is crucial for personal growth.

• Parenting requires intentionality and awareness of past traumas.

• Melanie embraced her daughter's individuality instead of molding her.

• Healing can come from being the parent you wished you had.

• True love is built on friendship and authenticity.

• Identifying generational trauma requires honest self-assessment.

• Creating a positive legacy is essential for future generations.

• God's timing is perfect in relationships.

• Healing is a journey that takes baby steps.

• There can be beauty in the ashes of our past.

Couples Conversation Guide: 

Main takeaway: 

If you were raised in the midst of unhealthy relationships, take heart—there is hope in Christ for a better future. Healing from past wounds opens the door to the freedom and joy of healthy, life-giving relationships. Along the journey, boundaries will protect your peace, forgiveness will soften your heart, and Christ must remain the foundation of it all.

Questions to Discuss: 

What messages or behaviors from our families growing up do we find ourselves repeating—intentionally or not—in our relationship or with our children?

When we face conflict or stress, do our reactions feel like our own—or do they echo how our parents or caregivers responded?

Are there parts of our past—such as experiences of neglect, abuse, shame, or loss—that we haven’t fully processed and might be impacting how we show up for each other and our children?

What do you hope your legacy will be?

Quotes from today's episode:

"It's okay to not be perfect."

“You’ve gotta have your truthtellers”

“There are things we may not see as big, but they become big.” 

“I always deflected with humor because I didn’t want to feel anything too deeply.” 

“They’ve achieved all these things that the world says is success, but they’re still empty.” 

“It’s so healing to be the thing in someone else’s life that you wish you would have had in your own.” 

“I didn’t get to have that mother, but I get to be that mother.”

“There is something so beneficial about having someone who’s not your friend, validate some of the experiences you’ve been through.” 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our Self Check Up Guide as an opportunity for honest self reflection. 

• Melanie Shankle’s Here Be Dragons

• Listen to Melanie on her wildly popular podcast The Big Boo Cast

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Did you know we have resources for families- check those out HERE.

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

We're excited to launch a brand-new format for the Awesome Marriage Podcast—and with it, introduce a highly requested new co-host: Mrs. Nancy Kimberling! In this episode, Dr. Kim and Nancy Kimberling take you on a heartfelt journey through the story of their relationship, from their blind date to their early years of marriage and parenting, all the way to the joy of becoming great-grandparents.

Their marriage hasn’t been without its challenges, but what’s carried them through it all is a decision they made early on: to keep God at the center of everything. Their wisdom, authenticity, and love for each other will make them one of your favorite couples to learn from.

We pray this episode encourages and blesses your marriage.

Episode Takeaways:

No matter how your marriage starts, everything changes when you invite the Lord in. He can transform the direction of your relationship in powerful ways. Building a strong, healthy marriage and family takes intentional effort and regular reflection on what’s working—and what’s not. Join the Kimberlings for an honest, up-close look at every season of marriage.

Questions to Discuss: 

When’s the last time you reflected on where and when your relationship began?

What scripture could you hold on to to help anchor your marriage to Christ? 

What is keeping your marriage from moving in the direction you want it to move?

Quotes:

“We had fights and I thought what is going on, I made a mistake.”

“You didn’t get the picket fence”

“I could have been the fun dad and still done discipline”

“God taught us He cares about everything”

“The more we brought Him into our conversations, our decisions. He was there. To guide us and to help us. 

“It’s saved our marriage.” 

“God was there when they got married, and He’s still there, and they made a covenant before Him and it matters.” 

“We took divorce off the table and we kept it off the table.”

“The most important thing to do in marriage is prayer.”

“It’s so important to have godly couples who are older than you and come alongside of you with godly wisdom.”

“It’s so important to have a village, a tribe, a life group to do life with.”

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you intentionally choose to puruse the marriage God intended, find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Try this FREE YouVersion plan: 5 Marriage Lies to Defeat with Biblical Truth

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to . receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In this heartfelt and honest conversation, Dr. Kim sits down with Jimmy Rollins to unpack the real-life highs and lows of marriage. They dive into why communication, forgiveness, and a strong support system are so crucial—and how those things have played out in their own lives. From the power of simple daily appreciations to creating a safe space for open conversations, Jimmy and Dr. Kim get real about what it takes to build (and rebuild) a strong relationship. They also reflect on how easy it is to chase success in the wrong places—and how to shift the focus back to what matters most. Whether you're in a great season or struggling to find your footing, this episode is full of practical wisdom and encouragement to help you grow and heal in your marriage.

• Every marriage is hard and requires effort.

• Forgiveness is a decision, while reconciliation is a process.

• Daily appreciation can reignite connection in marriage.

• Creating a safe space is essential for open communication.

• Winning at the wrong things can harm your marriage.

• Community support is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships.

• It's important to examine your own behavior in marriage.

• Practical steps can lead to significant changes in relationships.

• Couples should seek resources and mentorship for guidance.

• The goal in marriage is to think together, not alike.

• Are there areas of your marriage you are trying to ignore?

• Are there areas you are trying to change your spouse?

• How would you rate the community you have to support your marriage?

• What one thing can you say “no” to today, so that you have more margin to say “yes”  in your marriage. 

"Forgiveness is a decision."

"Community is what keeps us sober."

"You're not in it by yourself."

"Every marriage is hard."

"The goal is not to think alike."

"The best days are ahead of us."

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our FREE Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide to keep intentionally winning in your marriage!

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you prioritize your marriage. Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Traffic Signs and Your Marriage: Part 1

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

Main takeaway: 

Every relationship can be prone to drifting if we aren’t paying attention, and our marriage relationship is no exception. In this episode Dr. Kim and Lindsay talk about how easy it is to begin prioritizing good things over the best things, and how those small compromises lead to big disconnect in marriage.  This episode will help you recognize the signs of drift and begin to fight back against it!

• Recognizing the signs of drifting is crucial for couples.

• Prioritizing time together is essential to prevent drifting.

• Good things can distract from nurturing the marriage.

• Drifting can happen gradually without realization.

• Communication and emotional intimacy are key to a strong marriage.

• Common signs of drifting include changes in communication and intimacy.

• Non-sexual physical touch can enhance emotional intimacy.

• It's important to address issues early before they become entrenched patterns.

Questions to Discuss: 

Is your marriage reflected on your calendar?

When’s the last time you encouraged your spouse with your words?

Do you feel pressure to say yes to things outside of your marriage that in turn forces you to say no to things that would grow your marriage?

Are you protecting your energy so that you make the most of the time with your spouse?

What’s one thing you can do today to show your spouse you’re pursuing your marriage?

Quotes:

“You drift without even realizing it.”

“Sometimes good things get in the way of the most important things”

“If you’re drifting away you’re more vulnerable to sin.”

“You have to choose the best over the good.”

“There are things I could have done different.”

“In our culture, life gets in the way and we don’t even think about it.”

“I’ve always got to know that Nancy is a gift, and I have to embrace that gift, and treat her like a gift every day.”

“Drifting happens gradually.”

“Show me where you have your marriage on your calendar.”

“It’s on my calendar now.”

“It’s not going great, but everyone’s just accepting it.”

“You can do something!”

“Make sure you go to somebody who can be objective and is for your marriage.”

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our FREE Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide to help keep the connection and fight the drift!

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you fight the drift in marriage? Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Pursuing Your Spouse in Marriage Pt 1

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In this episode of the Awesome Marriage podcast, Lindsay and Dr. Kim discuss the importance of resolving conflict in a faith-centered, biblical way. They debunk the myth that Christian couples do not experience conflict and emphasize that conflict can lead to growth and deeper intimacy in relationships. Learn the biblical principles for handling conflict, practical steps for effective communication, and the significance of humility and selflessness in marriage.

Episode highlights include:

• Timeouts can help manage heated discussions.

• Keeping short accounts prevents resentment from building up.

• Using the silent treatment is a form of emotional manipulation.

• Bringing up past conflicts as weapons is unhealthy for marriage.

• Involving others in conflicts before addressing them with your spouse can create triangles of conflict.

• Taking responsibility for one's actions is crucial in resolving conflicts.

• Prayer is a powerful tool for maintaining a healthy marriage.

• Biblical principles provide a framework for resolving conflicts effectively.

Couples Conversation Guide: 

Main takeaway: 

You will experience conflict with your spouse, and when you do it’s important to keep the Lord at the center of the conversation. Remember your spouse is not your enemy and words shouldn’t be your weapon. Acknowledge your part and be quick to forgive. 

Questions to Discuss: 

• Which area of conflict resolution do you need the most help in- bringing up the past, resorting to the silent treatment, or taking responsibility for your part?

• Have you brought that struggle to the Lord and invited Him into the conflict in your marriage? 

QUOTES 

• Conflict is normal and if done right can help our marriage grow.

• Even though we are both seeking to follow Christ, we are human.

• If your kids see you doing that, they want that, and it gives them security.

• Having a marriage that’s not life-giving, can drain you so quick. It zaps your energy.

• When a couple is able to get past the things keeping them at odds, it goes beyond the marriage too.

• I can’t meet all her needs, but God can.

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our Marriage Boundaries Workbook to navigate tough conversations and hard seasons. 

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you navigate conflict? Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Fighting for Your Marriage

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Did you know we have resources just for handling conflict in your marriage?- check those out HERE.

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

• Now is the perfect time to join our Marriage Changers program. Enjoy every resource of the month plus bonus content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy. Join now, just in time to receive our May “7 Most Popular Resource Bundle.”

In this conversation, Lindsay and Dr. Kim discuss the concept of cultivating a servant-hearted marriage, emphasizing the importance of serving one another selflessly. They explore how serving each other can create a loving and respectful environment, reflecting God's design for marriage. The discussion includes practical ways to serve, the impact of a servant-hearted marriage on family dynamics, and the barriers that can hinder this service. They also highlight the significance of self-examination and seeking help when facing challenges in marriage. 

Episode highlights include:

• Cultivating a servant-hearted marriage requires daily choices to act in love.

• Children benefit from witnessing a servant-hearted marriage.

• A servant-hearted marriage reflects God's design and glorifies Him.

• Serving one another should come from the heart, not a checklist. Counseling can help break negative patterns in marriage.

Couples Conversation Guide: 

Main takeaway: 

God’s design for marriage goes far beyond just coexisting with your spouse. Serving one another, respecting their wants and needs, and creating a loving relationship reflect the heart of the Lord and His design for the marriage relationship. 

Questions to Discuss: 

What stands in the way of you selflessly serving your spouse?

Has your relationship with your spouse become transactional?

QUOTES 

• "Serving is saying, sure, I can do that."

• "Don't stay stuck there."

• "You don't just grow better."

• "God sees you."

• "It's gonna make a difference."

• “If your kids see you doing that, they want that, and it gives them security.”

• “Having a marriage that’s not life-giving, can drain you so quick. It zaps your energy.”

• “When a couple is able to get past the things keeping them at odds, it goes beyond the marriage too.”

• “I can’t meet all her needs, but God can.”

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our Marriage Boundaries Workbook to navigate tough conversations and hard seasons. 

• Want an opportunity to dig into God’s Word as you navigate boundaries? Try this Awesome Marriage YouVersion reading plan: Boundaries in Marriage

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Did you know we have resources for families- check those out HERE.

Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

Dr. Kim and Lindsay dive into a heartfelt conversation about the power of communication and unity in parenting. They talk about why it’s so important for parents to be on the same page when it comes to raising their kids, facing challenges as a team, and setting a strong example through their own decision-making. Along the way, they explore how to navigate differences in parenting styles, adapt to the ever-changing needs of children as they grow, and lean on prayer for guidance in tough decisions.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

• It's unrealistic to agree on everything in parenting.

• Children benefit from the security of united parents.

• It's important to filter parenting advice based on core beliefs.

• When you disagree, and you will, model respect for your spouse.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Couples Conversation Guide: 

Main takeaway: 

Do you and your spouse struggle to stay on the same page while parenting your children? Are you handling disagreements in a way that adds to the chaos? In this episode, Dr. Kim and Lindsay discuss how to navigate the hard conversations, the power of differing perspectives, and the benefit of a strong relationship as an example to your children. 

Questions to Discuss: 

Are you and your spouse allowing parenting to divide or unite?

In what ways can you better support your spouse in parenting?

Have you and your spouse set aside time to discuss the goals you have for your children? 

Quotes From this Episode:

“There's no shortcut to communication."

"Agreeing on core values is essential."

"Set aside time to discuss your challenges."

"Kids need security and stability."

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

• Use our Marriage Boundaries Workbook to navigate tough conversations and hard seasons. 

• Don’t let porn teach your children about sex. Get equipped to have “The Sex Talk”

• If you haven’t browsed our site, you’ve GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

• Did you know we have resources for families- check those out HERE.

• Sign up for Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier email for practical weekly marriage tips!

Dr. Kim and Camden Morgante explore how purity culture has shaped individuals' beliefs and relationships. They break down five harmful myths it promotes and examine how these misconceptions can impact a couple's sex life after marriage — including the unrealistic expectation of a fairy tale marriage as a reward for remaining pure. Dr. Morgante offers guidance to help couples move beyond the shame and guilt tied to these teachings, so they can embrace the beautiful gift God designed for marriage.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights:

Our God isn’t a transactional god.

Purity culture has been compared to the sexual prosperity gospel. Many individuals only hear negative messages about sex before marriage.

Reclaiming the beauty of sex involves holistic healing of mind, body, heart, and soul.

Teaching children about sexuality should focus on values rather than rules.

Purity culture can lead to feelings of being 'damaged goods'.

Myths of purity culture can cause disillusionment in faith.

Couples Conversation Guide: 

Main takeaway: 

Our motivation for purity before marriage can serve as a stumbling block to intimacy within our marriage. Purity before and within marriage is important, but our relationship with God isn’t transactional. We are missing the point of God’s heart for sex when the focus is on a reward. 

Questions to Discuss: 

How was the conversation surrounding sex approached in your youth?

Looking back, did you desire to stay pure before marriage and what was your motivation for purity?

Did you believe one of the “5 lies” Dr. Morgante mentioned in this episode?

What do you think Dr. Morgante means when she says that the lies of purity culture don’t just live in our minds, they live in our bodies? 

QUOTES:

• These myths didn’t just live in our minds, they lived in our bodies. -Dr. Camden Morgante

• When you try to control people, it’s really easy for shame and fear to become part of it.

• The end result may be good, but the way you get there can harm people.

• Shame and guilt is not from God.

• God wants us to experience healing.

• We have to have a deeper why for it.

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Dr. Camden Morgante’s Recovering from Purity Culture.  

• You can connect with Dr. Camden Morgante on Instagram

• Unlock True Intimacy: Become a couple who prays together. 

• We have several other AWESOME Resources on our website. Check those out HERE.  

• Check out our Bible Reading plans on YouVersion and make sure you’re following us there to keep current on all our newest plans!