B Movie Breakdown

Fear not faithful listeners, we have not forgot about you over this holiday break! So sorry for not updating you sooner, but the three of us have been so busy with the holidays that we sadly forgot to upload our half episode explaining that we will be taking a small break. We will be back January 15th, 2014 with a brand spanking new episode of B Movie Breakdown!

This week on the podcast we learn that snow dad is better than no dad, in the 1998 Christmas movie Jack Frost. Not to be confused with the horror movie we covered in Episode 10, this movie does feature a man transforming into a snowman except without all the murder. THIS Jack Frost stars Michael Keaton as musician…well…Jack Frost who fronts The Jack Frost Band. On his way home from cancelling a gig, to see his family, he gets in an abrupt car accident only to return one year later as a snowman. How does he return as a snowman, you ask? Well…we aren’t really sure other than his kid plays a harmonica with no magical powers and all of a sudden the snowman comes alive. This movie is creepy on so many levels and throws so much logic out the window, it’s pretty obvious why it bombed so hard at the box office. It is available on Netflix, so if you’re in the mood for an interesting family holiday movie, then this one is for you!

Each year there is always the “BIG TOY.” In the late 80s and early 90s it was Cabbage Patch Kids. In the late 90’s it was Tickle Me Elmo. And in the fictional world of 1998’s Jingle All The Way, it was TURBOMAN! Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sinbad are after that ever so special Turboman doll in this Christmas classic that is also a satire on commercialism. Also starring Phil Hartman was the super creepo neighbor, who in our opinion steals the entire movie. Just goes to show, even in a smaller role in a over the top silly holiday movie Phil Hartman was always on his game. Now many will argue that this isn’t a “B Movie,” but not only does it share many qualities of a typical B Movie, it also includes a 20 min scene where a child doesn’t recognize his own father by his face, let alone he is probably the only person in Minnesota with an Austrian accent…I think that makes it a contender. It’s Turbo Time!

Twas the night before Thanksgiving, when on a drunk podcast. Not a single beer was left, not even a Pabst. The movie we chose starred the manly Reb Brown. Yor, The Hunter From The Future did not make us frown. The boys were still laughing with beers in their hands. While Gina’s level of tolerance greatly expands. And that’s about it for this lovely B Movie Breakdown poem, because the movie we watched this week warranted us getting as drunk as we did. We do apologize for the levels of silliness in this episode, but Yor brought that out in us for sure. Reb Brown plays the “future” barbarian looking to find himself as he battles ape like men and many Darth Vaders. Oh and we almost forgot to mention Yor’s amazing theme song and badass hair! Go watch this movie on Amazon Instant Watch then enjoy this lovely and silly episode of the podcast!

This week Ryan and Corey are Gina-less as they watch 1992’s Bebe’s Kids, a movie that is so fine it will make you want to get a job. A movie we all loved growing up, because it had bad language and wasn’t the typical animated fluff we were used to. A movie that to this day people still quote, especially the line “We don’t die, we multiply.” Sadly, this movie is a product of it’s time and doesn’t hold up whatsoever. The main draw was that it was a cartoon you weren’t supposed to watch and it really wasn’t 100% for kids and I think that’s why we all liked it so much. For those of you who don’t know, Bebe’s Kids is about Robin Harris recounting his disastrous first date with the ever so beautiful Jamika. Tagging along for the date are Jamika’s mild-mannered son Leon and Jamika’s friend Bebe’s three rude and obnoxious kids to a theme park called Fun World.

This week on the podcast, we take a look at a modern day classic, 2011’s MANBORG! A movie that looks like one massive SEGA CD game is certainly right up our alley. Count Draculon and his HELL army seek to take over Earth during the HELL WARS. A soldier is killed attempting to fight the Count, then transformed into MANBORG after his body is fitted with robotics. After MANBORG becomes active in Mega-Death City, he meets with resistance fighters against The Barron & Count Draculon. With the help of Justice, Mina, & #1 Man; MANBORG must destroy Count Draculon and reclaim Earth once and for all!!

This week on the podcast we take on one of the most insane and ridiculous movies of all time, the 2011 Ross Patterson film Poolboy: Drowning Out The Fury. We previously covered Ross’s other movie, FDR: American Badass, early on in the history of the podcast. This movie within a movie within a movie is about the never before seen fictional film Poolboy 2: Drowning Out The Fury. We get the behind the scenes with director St. James St James, who directed it when he was only 10 years old, and most of the actual “movie” itself. It stars Kevin Sorbo as Jan Van Hammer as The Poolboy and is so mind blowingly funny you will lose your mind. This movie is intentionally bad and hits the nail on the head. Its the ultimate culmination of late 80s/early 90s action movies with the crazy behind the scenes antics of a movie deemed to racially insensitive for public viewing. We highly recommend you go on Netflix and watch this movie before listening, but maybe our discussion will inspire you to do so.

Before we take a short break from horror movies, we end our month long marathon with the forgotten 1993 horror anthology made for tv movie, Body Bags. Directed by John Carpenter and Tobe Hooper, this little gem was overshadowed by the hit series Tales From The Crypt and forgotten about for decades…until now! Not only are we watching & discussing this week, but Scream Factory is also putting the film out on blu ray as well! The movie features very interesting stories and features the likes of Robert Caradine, Wes Craven, Tom Arnold, Stacy Keach, Debbie Harry, and Mark Hamil. Hamil provides easily the best performance in the segment, The Eye! If you don’t have the time to get the movie on blu ray, you can watch it in full on YouTube, and then buy it on blu ray after.

This week we have a movie so frightening you may NEVER recover! That’s right, in this episode we take a look at the 1982 underrated slasher film Visiting Hours. Deborah is a controversial middle-aged TV journalist, who is campaigning on air on behalf of a battered woman who murdered her abusive husband, claiming justifiable defense against the so-called victim. But her outspoken views on women’s rights incense one of the studio’s cleaning staff, closet homicidal psycho Colt Hawker. Colt, played my the underrated Michael Ironside, has some deep seated issues despising all things female, that occurred from seeing his Mother throwing boiling oil in the face of his abusive Father when he was a small child. On his first attack she somehow manages to survive, which leads to her being bed-ridden in a hospital and the true terror begins.

8 more days till Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! 8 more days till Halloween! Sil-ver Shamrock!! If you have seen this week’s movie, you will have the tune to that song in your head instantly when reading it, as it is played like 100 times throughout the movie. And well speaking of the movie, this week we continue our month long horror movie marathon with 1982’s Halloween III: Season Of The Witch. Now most people truly hate this movie for not featuring Michael Myers, but if you remember the end of II he was blown to pieces in the hospital. So, John Carpenter and the rest of his crew wanted to get away from Michael and turn the franchise into an anthology series in which each movie just takes place on Halloween. This revolves around an evil Irish novelty company plotting to murder all of the children in the USA with their ever so popular Halloween masks.