Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets Pop Culture

When the President takes over a city’s police force, feuds with California’s governor over tacos, and still won’t release the Epstein files, you know it’s going to be a weird week. Plus, Harvard scientists officially ruin french fries.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

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President Trump and Vladimir Putin plan an Alaska meeting to “end” the Ukraine war—without inviting Ukraine. Plus, Trump’s new AI chatbot calls January 6 an “insurrection” and fact-checks its own boss, and D.C.’s homeless get told to move “FAR from the Capital.”

None of that distracts us from the Epstein Files.  Release them.
 

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

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Donald Trump “wins” another golf tournament at his own club—again—despite viral video showing some highly questionable caddie behavior. Rick Reilly calls it cheating, and we call it Tuesday.

Then South Park returns with a brutal takedown of JD Vance, Kristi Noem, and Charlie Kirk—featuring sentient Botox, baby oil for Satan, and Cartman doing exactly what you think he’s doing.

Also: JD Vance allegedly gets the Army Corps of Engineers to raise and lower a lake for better kayaking. Because apparently the Vice President can now adjust water levels like he’s ordering room service.

Plus a shoutout to Paranormal Aliens, and yes—still waiting on those Epstein files.


Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Donald Trump takes a bizarre rooftop stroll at the White House while talking about “missiles” and ballrooms. Meanwhile, the government casually announces plans for a nuclear reactor on the moon, and Trump teases a third term with “probably not.” From lunar fission to constitutional fiction, Ballot breaks down the week’s strangest headlines—plus, a reminder: release the Epstein files, you cowards. Hosted by Patrick Gutfield.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Donald Trump discovers Sydney Sweeney is a Republican and declares her jeans ad the “HOTTEST,” then goes on a Truth Social rant targeting Taylor Swift, Bud Light, and Jaguar. Meanwhile, the House Oversight Committee subpoenas Bill and Hillary Clinton over Jeffrey Epstein, and Homeland Security tries recruiting ICE agents using a South Parkscreenshot. Yes, really

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Patrick Gutfield covers Trump's bizarre comments about Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt's facial features during a Newsmax interview, the Senate's failed negotiations over Trump nominees after the president told Chuck Schumer to "GO TO HELL," and Doritos' attempt to create the next Cool Ranch with their new Golden Sriracha flavor targeting Gen Z.  Also, release the Epstein Files.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Patrick Gutfield breaks down Trump's Truth Social meltdown after Charlamagne tha God suggested traditional Republicans could use Epstein files to retake the GOP. Plus, the incredible story of Tiah McCreary who legally stole a car dealership's name after they repossessed her vehicle. Also covering the White House's continued resistance to releasing Jeffrey Epstein files and what might actually be in them.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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From sit-ups to spin zones, President Trump brings back the Presidential Fitness Test with help from WWE, golf pros… and a convicted sex offender. Meanwhile, Kamala Harris launches her 107-day campaign memoir and hints at a 2028 run, to the GOP’s delight. Democrats remain rudderless as Hunter Biden hits the podcast circuit and the Smithsonian quietly scrubs Trump’s impeachments from its exhibits.

If you’re wondering how to lose an election in under four months, Kamala’s got you covered.

Portions of today’s show were made with the help of AI and “release the Epstein files.”

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Patrick Gutfield unpacks Donald Trump’s latest mental slip-ups, including imaginary chats with dead relatives, forgetting his own appointments, and calling world leaders “Mr. Japan.” Plus, Hulk Hogan’s beer brand tries to rescue Hooters from bankruptcy—because of course it does. Portions of today’s show were made with the help of A.I. and nice hooters.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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Patrick Gutfield exposes a real-life cat burglar named Leo who’s been stealing socks across New Zealand, then digs into why your electric bill is sky-high (hint: blame A.I.). Plus, Jay Leno misses the days when late-night hosts just told jokes and didn’t pick sides. Portions of today’s show were made with the help of A.I. and a very judgmental utility bill.

Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.

Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!

Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show! 

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