I thought what could be good and fun piece to write about would only be a disservice to men and their cocks. I don't want to undo what my play partner had healed in me, my views of men, ego and their dicks. 

Had hurt feelings in the past not feeling good enough and not worthy, but shouldn't I be adored for worshipping his cock for hours- "should'ing" on self is not a good idea.

Objectification, me not liking it, really just abandonment fears? Maybe those that objectify are projecting their abandonment fears?

My words and my actions, are prayers of grateful moments- I can't just 'say words', I can't just 'pretend an act'; I want to lift you to your higher self not feed your ego. 

Likely not having sex.

Been wanting to create a piece about Oz and the little man behind the curtain. I had some rough drafts but tonight was passionately, and when I say passion I mean suffering, tonight it came out and so did stuttering. My brain has been stressed and tonight in distress. I see you seem me see you; and all my projections. 

I love emotions and people but so hard to have both at the same time. New laptop I will be back to writing and hopefully less attached to thoughts. I think I'm 'becoming' closer to fucking...so much nonsense. I love reading to you, so here some of my stuff!

I keep dreaming of some man, feels familiar but not sure. He shows me after telling me how much he appreciates me. You mean in the middle of day without manipulative tactics, someone can tell me he loves me out of the blue and then tell me he wants to show me on my body?! What is this a real thing?! I'm sure it is, but for me it's been a recurring dream. 

Maybe just my masculine energy arriving to help assist me.

My attachment insecurities are rampant as people around me in my circle are gone, stories of abandonment are surfacing and I almost jumped my play dynamic ship after play session.

Who is this man I keep dreaming of?! 

No cock for vagina. Sadz. When do men decide they want to emotionally connect with or through sex?

Confirmed I need an emotional connection to an emotionally available cock to enter my pussy. Still haven't had sex almost 10 years. I wish to find someone like my play partner but for day play, can host, and sometimes available for non sexual things.  Good girl conditioning have women hold onto their cookie that men think the way to an emotional connection is to not connect with a sexual woman?

I'm here to not waste time, to get through as many as I can to find someone I connect with sexually to fuck my pussy, with feelings though. I don't want to absorb your life or a forever committed anything.

I won't make my sexual side smaller to see if you'll be emotionally available; fucking rise to the occasion, literally. 

Inspired by day dreams a day and night of intentional sexual appreciation.  

physical pain, emotional pain, and dopamine drop oh my! I'm still so curious about human connections and experiences not even the big bad corporation or the male unable to deal with rejection reporting my tinder account can make me crack....cause crack is whack. 

Thank you for being here...hit me up sometime send me a smile and a hello!

for fuck shit, not safe for work ;) yes long but worth it? I think so. Raw Bliss Torture, messy primal shit....oy! Intense. Terrific the dynamic is more defined into being erotic dynamic for play. I can relax my 'wants' for closeness. I can let go of romantic illusions, this is not that kind of playground I can accept.

Thanks for being here! Drop me a message and let me know how you enjoyed?!