Be The Wolf

Have you taken a step forward and the voices in your head said, “Oh no, you can’t do that, you’re not that kind of person, nobody will take you seriously?”

Maybe you are finally getting everything you you have longed for, but how are you supposed to inspire and lead others when deep down you feel like a fake.

Perhaps someone introduced you by associating you to something you do and it caused an uneasy feeling inside?

You said to yourself, “That’s not who I am.”

I lived this one for a long time. I spent more than twenty years bartending. I was a great bartender. I also took photographs, made art, and participated in gallery shows. When people introduced me as bartender, I lit up.

When they called me a photographer or an artist, my body flooded with uncomfortable feelings and shame. “I can’t call myself that until it pays my bills,” I told myself.

Imposter syndrome is tied to who we think we are, who we think we are supposed to be, our past, our beliefs, and our level of self worth.

Join me and Debby Meadows as we unpack Imposter Syndrome live on Self-Sabotaging Sagas.

Connect with Debby Here:

Website: http://flowhealingmindbodyspirit.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/flowhealingmindbodyspirit/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgb97iXd7UW-UstpJrriIpA

Connect with Genea Here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

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Do you start projects and never finish them? Does the first step taunt you like a bully?

Finishing a project can feel like an impossible task, but when you identify the problem and the source of your sabotage, you have already taken a huge step towards completion.

Whether your issue presents as a lack of motivation, imposter syndrome, overwhelm, flat inspiration, or needing help, you will not want to miss this sexy episode of Self-Sabotaging Sagas.

Kristy Lin Billuni, The Sexy Grammarian, and I will talk about self-sabotaging behavior.

As a writing coach, and a former sex educator Kristy expertly breaks people through their creative slumps to help them finish projects.

Connect to Kristy here:

Website: https://sexygrammar.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sexygrammarian

IG: https://www.instagram.com/thesexygrammarian/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thesexygrammarian/

Connect with Genea Here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/genea1

You know the cycle: do the bad habit, feel the shame, then do the bad habit again to avoid the shame.

For you the habit might be: procrastinating, eating, working too much, sleeping all day, boozing, Netflix binging, or shopping.

The problem is, the cycle acts like a generator. It builds the shame bigger and bigger until it spirals out of control. And when you DO try to take control, unseen forces drag you back into the loop.

You are not alone, and these unseen forces are your unconscious mind.

Sometimes it’s because every time you felt good in the past something bad happened. Your unconscious mind now is trying to protect you from the bad thing in the future by sabotaging the good thing right now.

Perhaps part of you feels uncomfortable with attention. And when you get to that weight where people start noticing, or when you get recognition at work, your unconscious mind sabotages you back under the radar.

Or maybe your mom yelled at you for drawing attention to yourself. Now your unconscious mind thinks it’s saving you from getting yelled at by keeping you from being your full, expansive, bad ass self.

The unconscious mind is ALWAYS is trying to create something positive for you, but sometimes it’s not in alignment with our conscious mind. And so the shame cycle begins.

This cycle affects not only affects your emotional well-being but also your health. Join me and one of my favorites, Functional Health Coach Becca Kyle, for a conversation on the habit—shame— habit cycle.

Connect to Becca here:

Website: ht

Facebook group-Gut Health 101: https://www.facebook.com/groups/578148979475592

Facebook: https://wwwhttps://www.facebook.com/holisticobsession

IG: https://www.instagram.com/myholisticobsession/

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

Let’s face it, expectation and disappointment go hand in hand.

While expectations can sometimes drive us to do a good job, achieve greatness, and be better, often they set us up for failure, diminished self worth, and let down.

You have likely been trying to meet expectations your entire life.

Are these expectations your own, or have you taken on someone else’s?

Are your expectations keeping you from being in a place of acceptance?

Join Isabel Firecracker and myself as we dig into the self-sabotage of EXPECTATION

Connect to Isabel here:

Website: https://www.theuprisingspark.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/isabelfirecracker

IG: https://www.instagram.com/thehonestuproar/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/theuprisingspark/

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

I believe most of us have been confronted with some form of grief in the last year.

Perhaps you lost a loved one, a job, or your favorite watering hole.

How did you handle it? Did you crawl into a ditch? Are you still there?

Perhaps you shoved the grief under the rug and kept going like nothing had changed. Or perhaps you allowed yourself to stop and let the grief wash over you, and then you moved on?

There is no one right way to deal with grief, but one thing is for certain, you must deal with it.

If you don’t it will come back to sabotage you at a most inconvenient time.

Often when presented with loss we discover that we are more resilient and stronger than we knew.

And if we are lucky, we realize it is what we carry within us that is most important.

This realization is important because life will keep happening even when we are standing in a pile of rubble, and it is ultimately what we carry within that will pull us through.

Join me and Widow Wellness Coach Jamie Metzgar for a Live Self-Sabotaging Sagas episode on grief.

Connect to Jamie here:

Website: https://www.widowwellnesscoaching.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/widowwellnesscoaching

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/widowwellnesscoaching/

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

Sometimes when we shift the subconscious we don’t notice the changes right away.

Life seems to be going through one of those smooth periods. But eventually some circumstance will come up, and you think to yourself, “Wow, I really handled that differently than I would have in the past.”

I ask my clients to track for the differences in their life as opposed to what is the same.

Sometimes these occurrences are obvious right away, and sometimes the shifts will be noticeable a month or two later.

It can be a subtle thing like, “I didn’t feel that underlying stress when I went to the grocery store.”

Other times it is something big like, “I didn’t yell back when the car wash guy started screaming at me.”

Often when I first start working with someone their dreams get weird. When this happens I get excited because dreams are a window into our subconscious.

Again we want to look for what is different in the dreams compared to how they usually go.

One client of mine stood up and fought the demons instead of running away from them. We had been working on fear. This was an concrete sign that his subconscious mind was shifting.

This week we will talk to our gracious volunteer Holly about the differences she has noticed the last two weeks after doing some healing around trauma and fear with me.

Holly Hood volunteered to participate in the previous two episodes of Self-Sabotaging Sagas. Check them out! 

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

Whether it is the anger that destroys or the fear that paralyzes, excessive emotional reactions play a huge part roll in self-sabotage.

How many times have you found yourself apologizing for over the top behavior?

You know you’re not a bad person, but once you are triggered it feels like you have zero control.

Your friends know to duck and cover when you get a certain look in your eye.

They also know you disappear from time to time.

What they don’t know is that disappearing is how you deal with a sadness and shame spirals.

You have your ways of coping, but there is no need to live with these “triggers” when they can be healed.

Most of these triggers are formed when we are too young to process and understand overwhelming emotions.

When we experience overwhelm it registers to the nervous system as trauma.

By taking a subconscious journey back in time, we can give your past self what they needed to process their emotions and set the trigger free.

This enables you up to respond rather than react and overreact to events moving forward.

Holly Hood has graciously volunteered to participate in 3 episodes of Self-Sabotaging Sagas.

In the first one, I demonstrated one of the ways I begin working with someone to heal trauma. 

This week we will touch base about what she noticed in the previous week, and then do some healing work on fear.

In the final third episode, Holly will share what she noticed over the course of the previous two weeks.

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

These days, “trauma” is a buzz word. People are opening up about their trauma left and right.

There are meme’s describing almost every behavior as a trauma response.

But for some people, trauma is more than just a buzz word.

Their unhealed trauma prevents them from living the life they dream about.

If you are one of those people you are probably trying to do everything right, but get easily triggered and have a hard time moving forward.

YOU HAVE TRIED shoving it under the rug—that didn’t work.

YOU HAVE TRIED therapy and talking about it at nauseam—and you might feel as if you’ll jump off a bridge if you have to recount your trauma one more time.

I’m being dramatic, but the shit is real.

Trauma can really throw a wrench in your life and cause everything to fall apart.

I love healing trauma because it can shift how you relate to everything.

When your subconscious is not working at overtime to try to keep you from reliving your trauma it will free up energy to actually live and enjoy your life.

Holly Hood has graciously volunteered to participate in 3 episodes of Self-Sabotaging Sagas.

In the first one, I will demonstrate one of the ways I begin working with someone to heal trauma.

The second one we will touch base about what she has noticed in the previous week, and then do some healing work on fear.

In the final third episode, Holly will share what she has noticed over the course of the previous two weeks.

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/geneabarnes

I remember a handful of years ago a friend of mine had a life threatening illness.

He almost died!

When he got out of the hospital he was determined to live a better life.

He wanted to be around for his grandkids and his kids.

He was only 45. He did everything the doctors said. He cut out all the bad food, and he started exercising. He lost 40 pounds in 2 months and was feeling like he had a new lease on life.

Then I saw him drink a soda, then fried wings, and before I knew it he was right back where he had started.

Feeling like crap and shoveling the worst food into his body.

Most of us have know what we need to do to be healthy and feel good, but just like my friend most of us self-sabotage ourselves right back to the place we started.

Join me and Health coach Hadlee Garrison Health for a talk of self-sabotaging health.

Connect with Genea here:

Website: https://geneabarnes-elevate.com/

Book a Free Step UP call: https://calendly.com/geneabarnes/stepup

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genea-barnes/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/geneabarneselevate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geneabarnes/

Connect with Hadlee here:

Website: https://www.happyhealthyhadlee.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hadlee/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/happyhealthyhadlee

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/happyhealthyhadlee/