Special Education Boss® with Karen Mayer Cunningham

Behavior Is Communication: Safety, Structure & Relationship with John Vergara


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What if we stopped calling kids “difficult”… and started getting honest about what difficult behavior is really communicating?

In today’s episode, Karen Mayer Cunningham sits down with John Vergara (aka The Difficult Student) — an assistant principal over special education and one of the most impactful voices online when it comes to behavior, leadership, and building classroom culture that actually works.

John shares his personal story — from being the student with challenging behavior to becoming a leader supporting teachers, paraprofessionals, and IEP teams across two schools. This conversation is real, practical, and grounded in what helps kids and protects learning for everyone in the room.

✨ What You’ll Learn

  • Why John says “the student is good — it’s the behavior we work on”
  • The 3-part foundation: safety → love → self-esteem
  • Why structure and procedures are not “strict”… they’re support
  • A simple mindset shift that changes everything for teachers in hard environments

Resources + Links

✅ Join The Academy (Skool Community): https://www.skool.com/special-education-academy/about

✅ Get Karen’s book The Epic IEP (official link): https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1637635125?tag=simonsayscom

Find John Vergara (The Difficult Student)

  • Instagram / TikTok: @thedifficultstudent
  • Podcast: The Difficult Student Podcast (Spotify / Apple / YouTube)

If this episode helped you, follow the podcast, leave a review, and share it with a teacher, parent, or advocate who needs it.

“When we get it right for the child, we get it right for everybody.” — Karen Mayer Cunningham

Support the show

✨ When we get it right for the child, we get it right for everybody. ✨

👩‍⚖️ Hosted by Karen Mayer Cunningham, Advocate & Special Education Boss®
Each week, Karen shares real stories, legal insights, and no-nonsense strategies to help you navigate special education with clarity and confidence.

👉 Subscribe & never miss an episode — new episodes drop every week!
🎓 Join The Academy: Weekly live trainings + 250+ hours of advocacy tools & expert resources
🔗 Learn more at The Epic IEP™ Academy First month free, after that, cancel anytime.

📱 Follow Karen on:

  • TikTok & Instagram: @specialeducationboss
  • YouTube: Special Education Academy

🧠 Want to level up your advocacy game?
Check out the Advocate's Bookshelf — a curated collection of must-have tools, guides, and legal references every special education advocate should own. From federal code to diagnostic manuals, these are the essentials that help you advocate with clarity and confidence.

📚 Browse now: https://amzn.to/3RiQPLl
(As an Amazon Associate, Karen may earn a small commission if you make a purchase — at no extra cost to you.)

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Special Education Boss® with Karen Mayer CunninghamBy Karen Mayer Cunningham, Special Education Boss®

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