Bibleish

It's officially JESUS SEASON on Bibleish, but this week we're bringing back an episode that we both adore for the first time since it launched: our 2019 Christmas extravaganza! In this episode, Lily gives us an eye-opening background on the true Pagan origins of Santa, Christmas, and holiday blood-splashing. We also finish the story of baby Jeebus, follow him into his early adulthood, watch him get yelled at by his mom, and sing you some songs. We hope you enjoy and we'll see you on Christmas Day for our next episode!

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Part Queen and part Priestess, Jezebel is an infamous Bible character whose reputation often precedes her. But as one of the few recurring female Bible characters who also AT LEAST IS GIVEN A NAME (!!) she receives more slander and holds more power than some might want you to believe. Find out what happened to Queen Jezebel and her Baals in this interactive episode, and join our Patreon if you'd like to access part one of our telling of Jezebel's tale.

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Music Credits to Doug Maxwell, Asher Fulero, and Kevin MacLeod. 
Desert City by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/. Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100564. Artist: http://incompetech.com/

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We're all a little over Elisha's shiny, no-grit personality, so this week we're doing a SPEEDRUN through Kings to cover Elisha AND a few new(ish) faces. But just when we thought Elisha had nothing too interesting left to offer, we start to wonder: is this  prophet starting to lose his finesse? Or is it normal to douse people with oil and then run away? 

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Angela tells Lily the story of Eithne, Pagan goddess of the grain, and her unlikely counterpart - the King of Death. Crom Cruach is associated with Samhain for many reasons, not the least of which is his eternal affiliation with harvesting souls and marking the necessary death of Winter. Enjoy this Pagan spookytime episode. Happy Halloween, ghouls and goblins!

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A quick announcement about today's episode... which is coming to you tomorrow for Halloween! Also, Lily has something to confess.

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Biblical smut is BACK as Darlene and her family return to Shunem, the site of her last (embellished) tryst with the prophet Elisha. She has dreamt of his hands, his smile, and his embrace for seven years -- sorry, Hank -- and now she is as excited as she is nervous to see him. What she finds in her home instead gives her a shock that sends her running.  Will the long lost lovers reunite? But also does she remember that she is married? Can Lily and Angela still say words good? Listen now to find out.

Sound Credit for Music: Ugonna Onyekwe

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We have Lily back! And now, we're BOTH unhinged -- because there is no wrong way to deal with grief. Join us for an update, a few chaotic laugh-cries, and a sincere moment of thanks. We'll be back to our regularly scheduled Bible chat very soon. Thank you all, we hope you are doing well and we love you.

Sound Credit for Music: Bensounds

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Jephthah is not prepared for the sacrifice he'll have to make after God helps him win a ginormous battle.  Like, SUPER unprepared. But what happens as a result is the most epic Ladies' Weekend in the Bible. Come to the mountains with us, friends! No Jephthahs allowed.

P.S. Join the Listeners' Ark! 2 by 2, file into our Patreon at the link below to support the show for as little as $1 a month.

You can also support the show by leaving a review. We LOVE to see them, and we are so grateful for you!

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Did you know God had a wife? Yeah. Asherah. The one who was written out of the Bible ON PURPOSE, but everyone really loved her. In this minisode relaunch, we talk about how dope Asherah is AND we get a super special reading of Lily's poem, which she created based off the missing pieces of Asherah's tale.

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This week we revisit one of the baddest b*tches of all time, Lilith: storm demon, night monster, and nickname to our very own Lily.  She was Adam's first wife... the one who *literally* got away! But why was she written out of the Bible? And why the bad reputation? Join us to find out  :)  

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