Bipolar She with Janine Noel

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Have you ever thought about your mental health journey and wondered if it needed to get as bad as it did? As Bipolar She celebrates its 1-year anniversary, I sit down with writer/actor JD to reflect on the podcast. We chat about how I am often reminded I have bipolar illness because I get little glimmers of mania and psychosis and how the world can just feel “off.” Even a strict regimen of medication and sleep doesn’t make me feel totally normal. And even though I am thirteen years post-hospital for a psychiatric event, I still live in terror that it could happen again and that another hospitalization would be soul-crushing.

The conversation heats up when I suggest that my bipolar illness didn’t need to get as severe as it did. This revelation is based on looking at my childhood and young adulthood where I became the “identified patient” or black sheep in my family. This is primarily an unconscious dynamic in a family, so family members may not even be aware that this role has been assigned to someone—someone they may love very much. 

As the “sick kid” for much of my life, I learned that being sick was actually “safe” in my household and these unconscious lessons paved the way for me to continue to find safety with illness as I got increasingly sicker with bipolar and Crohn’s disease in my adulthood.

We talk about the therapeutic effect of writing and how science backs up how writing about big traumas in your life can improve mental health. And we also talk about how anyone can be an advocate for mental health at any time. You never have to be fully “healed” from mental illness to make an impact by telling your stories with the hope they reach others.

Thanks to JD for a great conversation!

How to Become a Mental Health Advocate

How Journal Writing is Proven to Improve Your Mental Health (Huberman Labs)

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Have you tried meditation, and it really wasn’t your thing? Are you ever overwhelmed with negative or depressing thoughts? Or maybe you can’t see your life changing for the better because you have old perceptions of yourself stuck in your head? With story as your superpower, you can learn to positively project new futures, and perhaps this future even includes less medication for those with depression.

Today we get answers and insight into how we can reclaim our lives as we struggle with low moods or even just the blues. I talk with Dr. Norman Farb, a professor of psychology at the University of Toronto, where he studies the neuroscience of human identity and emotion. He is co-author, with Zindel Segal, of the new book, Better in Every Sense: How the New Science of Sensation Can Help You Reclaim Your Life.

This research is illuminating and potentially a game changer, particularly for those with treatment-resistant depression. At the crux of Dr. Farb’s research is how the act of sense foraging improves our mental health. And it’s not traditional mindfulness via meditation. From exercise to gardening, you can find the right access point for you.

With a toaster analogy, we learn about what’s going on in the brain of someone under stress or with depression and how we all operate primarily with a neural network in the brain, called the Default Mode Network or House of Habit--the epicenter of our idea of self, judgement, and what habituates us for survival. And it gets ramped up with sadness and anxiety.

Dr. Farb discusses research done with functional MRI’s which show how sadness inhibits a region in the brain that takes in sensory information. fMRI’s have proven that by tuning into sensation, the brain can change over time, which can then be a predictor of someone staying out of depressive episodes.

We learn how you can listen closely to your inner monologues and crack down on the negative loops. And how to strengthen connections with others.

There’s an amazing study we discuss that proves through practices like sense foraging, some patients were able to discontinue their medication for depression. 

Resources below:

Better In Every Sense: How the New Science of Sensation Can Help You Reclaim Your Life by Norman Farb and Zindel Segal.

What is MBCT and How to Find it: Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy 

Mindful Noggin: Evidence-based, digital courses will teach you how mindfulness can help you achieve greater emotional balance and resilience in everyday life.

UCSF Medical Center In-Person MBCT Courses

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

As an actor who started out on Broadway and now calls LA home, JD has survived the sting of rejection. But it was real life that recently delivered the sharpest of blows when his infatuation for a woman in a Zoom class led to unrequited love. When she wanted to "just be friends," JD's heart was broken, he was wounded, and even his neighbors would hear him in the throws of despair.

But underneath his obsession was an even darker part of his life. Every waking moment was centered around cannabis and getting high. For JD, marijuana was an addiction that he tried to break free from a half-dozen times. But it was the single substance in his life that proved to be more powerful than him.

JD joins me for a candid conversation about how his drug dependency and Zoom obsession spiraled out of control. Most relevantly, hitting this low-point started with the pit of depression: a history of dysthymia, treatment-resistant depression, and ultimately the merry-go-round of medications and prescribers of varying efficacy.

From confronting suicide (we hear JD's intense thoughts on ending his life) to the transformative power of therapy, JD is now walking a path of acceptance and balance in his second act.

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Dan wasn’t just a grumpy teenager who refused to get out of bed—by his early teens (and even younger) he was severely depressed with suicidal ideation at times. Today, at age forty, he can sum up his chronic depression as a constant battle in his life. The other constant has been his music. A singer-songwriter, now with the artist-persona, Conner Eko, he was accepted to Berklee College of Music at age twenty. Inspired to attend John Mayer’s alma mater, Dan was dissuaded by his family's belief in being practical. Dan let go of his music dream.
Twenty years later, Dan and I discuss the many paths he walked down, making some music in between but never committing to it fully. After a freak accident left him with concussion syndrome in 2021, Dan could barely get off the couch. The only thing that didn’t intensify his severe headaches was playing the piano. Music was a life source again.
When a friend casually suggested magic mushrooms to help his concussion, Dan (now an astrophysicist) discovered that psychedelics were being used to treat both head trauma and chronic depression. Under the care of an accredited therapist, Dan did high-dose psilocybin treatments. But the most amazing outcome was far from trippy visuals, but a purposeful integration period of intensive therapy, journaling, and returning fully to his art.
Join me as we talk good trips, bad trips, (while I’ll never trip), and the exciting launch of a new live in-studio single, “Standing Up,” that was written to share his story and advocate for change.

Conner Eko releases his single “Standing Up” on January 24th.

Listen here on distrokid
Website: connereko.com
@connereko
Spotify
Apple Music
YouTube
Bandcamp
Facebook

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Ava and I continue our conversation on the now infamous healer, John of God. In 2008, in a small Brazilian town, I stood before him waiting to know if I would have surgery. He did not perform his crude practices on me (eyeball scraping--with a butter knife, forceps up the nose, slicing open bodies to remove tumors), but he did grant me the title of "medium," suggesting I had the gift of spirits moving through me, just as they did through him. I was skeptical, but I was desperate to escape a disfiguring surgery, so why not believe I had spiritual gifts?
After intense "invisible" surgery where I felt "entities" or surrounding spirits working on my bowels, I headed home to San Francisco to wait and see if John of God's powers cured me of Crohn's...and, hopefully, of bipolar disorder as well.
There's some good healing news in this episode, while at the same time, trying to work with my medium or "psychic" abilities began to unravel me. Enjoy my chat with Ava, the kindest physician, and the ultimate skeptic.

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Today we take a detour from our examination of mental illness, and instead look at the impact of chronic physical illness on our lives. I've had Crohn's disease for more than twenty years. Physical illness is so often intertwined with one's mental health. And my severe case of Crohn's left me running scared and desperate to avoid a disfiguring surgery.
Dr. Ava, a physician and friend, explains Crohn's disease and autoimmune diseases, that ignite inflammation and often exacerbate mental health issues. My life became a dance of managing bipolar illness and Crohn's disease and resulted in back-to-back hospitalizations for both.
I felt forced to seek out unconventional healers, like the notorious John of God, who has drawn people from around the world with his unorthodox methods. In this episode, I answer the question as to why I would put myself in a risky situation to achieve healing.

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Her first binge felt like a trance. Normally uninterested in her family’s boring snack drawer, Dr. Regina Lazarovich had been restricting her food and her body took over while she ate everything in sight. Then Regina’s shame set in. Although she was desperate and sought help for her eating disorder during her twenties, she white-knuckled her way through more restriction and binging for a decade.
Regina's turning point and the beginning of her true healing and eating disorder recovery was stumbling onto the book Intuitive Eating. This book changed her life and helped her understand that her relationship with food was not sustainable. She found a new lens on society--that we live in a "diet culture." It clicked that it is not our fault we want to control our food and bodies, but that bodies are not supposed to be controlled. 
This learned philosophy ultimately shaped Regina’s path to becoming a clinical psychologist specializing in OCD, eating disorders—and, in particular, binge eating disorder, as well as the critical role of Intuitive Eating as a pathway to healing.
I learned so much from Regina and I am fascinated by her counter-culture views that would make the world a better place for our bodies and minds. She even helped me take a look at my own past with disordered eating from a warm, compassionate perspective.
Enjoy Regina’s heartfelt approach to recovery and encouragement for everyone to find peace with food.

Resources:
Dr. Regina Lazarovich
The Binge-Restrict Cycle Explained
Find Food Freedom by Divesting From Diet Culture
Intuitive Eating, 4th Edition
Anti-Diet: Reclaim Your Time, Money, Well-Being, and Happiness Through Intuitive Eating by Christy Harrison

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

After enduring a childhood overshadowed by emotional absence and the need to constantly please others, Amy Vincze felt like she no longer knew who she was. From panic attacks to perceived failures in her life, Amy needed to do something fast. Already using tapping for therapy, Amy discovered if she looked at the root cause of her emotions, she made transformative progress, and, in just a few weeks, she found emotional balance and a newfound sense of identity.

During our conversation, Amy shares how tapping integrates both cognitive and somatic elements to reach the root of emotional issues and traumas, simply by  taking the tips of your fingers and tapping on meridian points (like those in Traditional Chinese Medicine).

For those of us practicing Western medicine and talk therapy, this may sound a little far out there, but after stumbling upon Amy's tapping therapy six months ago, I have been wowed by its healing effects. Tapping therapy helps me deal with chronic pain from Crohn’s disease, insomnia, anxiety from being a person in this difficult world, and so much more. 

We also introduce Amy's "Soar with Tapping" app, featuring over 160 scripts designed to tackle issues ranging from pain management to procrastination.

Soar With Tapping app
@soarwithtapping
soarwithtapping.com

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

In our first episode of Bipolar She Raw, we hear Madelynn's story about her psychiatrist who made sexual advances towards her. She was confused because she knew he cared for her, and perhaps he was just getting old, with a few screws coming loose. But as his behavior became increasingly predatory, she found help through her therapist to remove herself from harm's way.

But Madelynn's fear of the psychiatrist-patient dynamic persists. She has yet to seek one out--possibly preventing her from getting better healthcare.

We also talk about Janine's experience in a "partial hospitalization" program, as Madelynn contemplates doing a "partial" or outpatient program to help her self-esteem, and her brain's executive functioning. They talk about taking life day to day to escape dark thoughts, knowing help is always an option, and that heavy times do pass--one frozen blueberry at a time.

@bipolarshepod
bipolarshe.com

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.

TEXT US: Have a Story? Feedback for the Show?

Today I sit down with Deirdre, my first guest whose parent had mental illness. Her mom, Minnie, managed bipolar disorder and Deirdre grew up fast. By age 6 she had been exposed to her mother’s suicide attempt. Later, when Deirdre asked her mom why she would want to leave her daughter, Minnie told her she was in a deep, dark hole with no visible way out.

Life with a bipolar parent became chaotic for Deirdre as she was stuck in the middle of a custody battle, suffered the loss of a brother, and now went on visits to her see her mom at a psychiatric facility. Living with her dad gave Deirdre some stability, but no one consistently showed in her daily life and asked young Deirdre, How can I help you?

Fast-forward years of school hopping, active duty in the military, a career in crisis communications and experience in community mediation--Deirdre had to make a critical decision. If your mom and grandmother have bipolar disorder, is having a child the right thing to do? Is the genetic likelihood of having a bipolar child simply too risky?

Deirdre is now in grad school fulfilling her lifelong dream to be a psychotherapist. With the gift of listening and letting her patients know they are always prioritized, Deirdre is driven to provide support that was not always available to her. 

Support the show

Bipolar She is dedicated to real conversations for women living with mental illness. Hosted by Janine Noel, the majority of episodes give voice to a woman who has lived-life experience with mental illness--or who has experienced the illness of someone close to them. Along the way, I interview experts in the field that address additional mental health concerns.

Frankly, coping with a mental health condition can be exhausting. Here's a place where you can land and find an episode that resonates with you. Some topics we've covered: being a bipolar mom or having a bipolar mom. Anxiety, agoraphobia, chronic depression, ECT, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, a psychiatrist that breaks your trust. A therapist who goes above and beyond to help you. The impact of trauma on your brain. 

Bipolar She couldn't have thrived without guitarist, JD Cullum's original music.

Editor Brandon Moran makes everyone's voice sound both crisper and smarter.

Sponsored by Amy Vincze's Emotional Freedom Technique App: Soar With Tapping.