Bitter Chatter

Knock knock! Who is it? A robot. A robot who? A robot who, when questioned about his past, will begin sweating profusely and shouting, "No YOU'RE nervous! YOU'RE the one that looks guilty! Stop pestering me! I made ONE MISTAKE!" and crying. Would you want to share your apocalypse-readiness bunker with this robot? What if he also could sing like Frank Sinatra? It's questions almost exactly like these that the boys will be answering today. One by one the visitors will come knocking, and they must decide: who is granted shelter, and who is left out in the wasteland?

How well do you know me? Well, due to our para-social relationship, I'd wager you only "know" me on a very surface level and any intimate details of my life that have not been shared on air are a complete and utter mystery to you because outside of this content we are little more than strangers to one another. But can you guess what my favorite book is!?

Let me ask you a question. No, wait... Okay, we're off to a bad start here but it's time for a Q&A session! We've cast our nets, browsed the net, and bought tickets to watch the Brooklyn Nets (that last one was less fruitful than we expected) and came back with some amazing questions asked by you, the listeners! Now enjoy as the boys combine their remaining functioning braincells like a pathetic microscopic Megazord and tackle the questions that you threw at them.

Respect the brand! Well, actually, disrespect the brands and demolish corporate capitalism before it demolishes what's left of civilized society. But for the sake of this quiz the boys are about to give each other that will test their knowledge of different brand slogans and the fat cat marketing machines that repeat them like a bad pop song chorus, then yeah, respect the brand!

Now I understand why you cry. It's because ogres are onions, and onions make you cry. Also, you watched The Breakfast Club and sometimes that movie makes people cry. I'm struggling here, folks. This episode sees the boys conclude their movie tournament and quite frankly it's a roller coaster of emotions and stupidity. Buckle up.

Who doesn't love putting on a movie, grabbing some popcorn, and getting lost in a wonderful story brought to life by an amazing collaborative effort? Well yeah, we all love putting on 1 movie at a time. But the boys have 32 movies sitting on their desks and the boss wants this narrowed down to one movie by 3pm! She's gonna have to wait a couple weeks though, because there's only one way the boys know how to solve a problem like this: it's tournament time!

What would you do if these two dillweeds decided to talk in circles about hypothetical scenarios a second time? Or, to clarify, would you hypothetically listen to a podcast where, oh I don't know, the topic of eagles dropping turtles on the heads of unsuspecting humans were to arise? Just hypothetically, of course.

In what will probably be the strangest and shortest Bitter Chatter episode ever, the boys decide to do something unheard of: they're going to prepare for the next tournament on their line-up! Join us for a brief adventure where these goofs will narrow down which movies will be making the cut for the upcoming movie tournament arc and which movies will be left behind! ...Do you guys hear Seth MacFarlane?

Here, let me take you to a room. It's a simple room. No fancy layout or illustrious door. But there are many decorations inside. The room is littered with outcasts and throwaways. It's a room with a purpose. Its purpose is to house all things unwanted, all things discarded. Go on, take a look inside... and have fun in Room 101.