Black On Both Sides

Episode #25

When KingKunta is running half marathons, his body weakens like an old man. Because of this, he can’t hang at parties. By 10:45 he is heading to the door. But not before noticing how much pain women put themselves through to be beautiful. Trust me that it isn’t more painful that waking up with a beard full of grays and looking 10 years older than you are. Put that in your spanx, ladies.

KingKunta changes his stance on the border caravan. Asylum seekers deserve and are awarded certain liberties by law in this country. Why aren’t we holding up our side of the law? Do we tear gas asylum seekers? Do we allow little girls seeking asylum to die in our custody? Apparently, we do. At least under a zero tolerance policy, we do. Once again, I end up being forced to defend the President’s position only because Kunta’s left-leaning outrage is so emotional. Above all, I have to agree that anyone neglected in our custody is insane. I am not sure if coming here is better or worse than just staying where you were. Pun intended this is the insane asylum.

Episode #24

Ice Cube drops an album that is considered his best in many years. But how did KingKunta invest his time? Listening to Gucci Mane. Most of you think Kunta is the sensible side of this partnership. However, I would like to introduce this as evidence A. If it is ratchet, Kunta likes it. This has to color his politics, but whatever…

Kunta is counting down on Trump’s impeachment. He brings more details this week. From Flynn’s testimony, to Cohen knowing where to find the dead bodies, Mueller continues to be Kunta’s superhero. I have a feeling if the water gets too hot, Trump will take a vacation to country with no extradition and decide to extend it forever.  Kunta thinks he will just resign and get pardoned. Either way you look at it, Kunta feels like the time has arrived and the orange man will soon also wear orange.

Episode #24

Ice Cube drops an album that is considered his best in many years. But how did KingKunta invest his time? Listening to Gucci Mane. Most of you think Kunta is the sensible side of this partnership. However, I would like to introduce this as evidence A. If it is ratchet, Kunta likes it. This has to color his politics, but whatever…

Kunta is counting down on Trump’s impeachment. He brings more details this week. From Flynn’s testimony, to Cohen knowing where to find the dead bodies, Mueller continues to be Kunta’s superhero. I have a feeling if the water gets too hot, Trump will take a vacation to country with no extradition and decide to extend it forever.  Kunta thinks he will just resign and get pardoned. Either way you look at it, Kunta feels like the time has arrived and the orange man will soon also wear orange.

Episode #23

Music is not sucking these days. Kunta hurls compliments at Meek Mill’s new project. This is odd because Kunta previously wanted Meek to proves his purpose for existing. I am having trouble breaking up with the Georgia Bulldogs after their “yet again” moment. As I am rebuking them and the other teams in Atlanta, Kunta reveals that The Dawgs will play a bowl game against his alma mater and I am instantly rejuvenated in fandom. 

On to serious topics. The U.S. has real enemies. Some are more real than others. Kunta feels like Russia is the most real due to Trump’s actions around Putin. I happen to believe this could all be chess and there is no reason to wet the bed. The fear is that Russia, like China, is a real threat because they own oarts of our economy. I believe that the world needs our economy more than anything else in the world. This world is set up to interact with the U.S.

Kunta comes prepared with The Michael Cohen timeline of how this Russia thing all unfolds. He is so ready for impeachment that he fails to remember that Trump is a billionaire. And Billionaires do not get punished in this country.

Episode #23

Music is not sucking these days. Kunta hurls compliments at Meek Mill’s new project. This is odd because Kunta previously wanted Meek to proves his purpose for existing. I am having trouble breaking up with the Georgia Bulldogs after their “yet again” moment. As I am rebuking them and the other teams in Atlanta, Kunta reveals that The Dawgs will play a bowl game against his alma mater and I am instantly rejuvenated in fandom. 

On to serious topics. The U.S. has real enemies. Some are more real than others. Kunta feels like Russia is the most real due to Trump’s actions around Putin. I happen to believe this could all be chess and there is no reason to wet the bed. The fear is that Russia, like China, is a real threat because they own oarts of our economy. I believe that the world needs our economy more than anything else in the world. This world is set up to interact with the U.S.

Kunta comes prepared with The Michael Cohen timeline of how this Russia thing all unfolds. He is so ready for impeachment that he fails to remember that Trump is a billionaire. And Billionaires do not get punished in this country.

Episode #22

How was your turkey? Mine was succulent. The ham too. How was Kunta’s? Dry as the foot of a shoeless African. But the sides were good, right? Kunta explains how to ruin a Thanksgiving. I will tell you how to prepare my dessert. 

Sorry we missed you last week. Kunta was off completing the trifecta of the Spartan races and much to his surprise, I am impressed. There is a lot to be said of a person that willingly request punishment to that extent. Congrats on the completion, Kunta.

Our big issue on this epsiode is the caravan of immigrants that finally made it to the border. Surprise though, You can’t actually just cross into the US. Even if Democrats have made you believe that no one likes Trump…You can’t just openly disregard sovereignty. So now what? I don’t know. Go home? Tijuana ins’t going to accept you. Liberals will not save you. In fact, no one came to these people’s rescue. At one point, they were fired on. Tear gas on a crowd of people including women and children is not the media day you want as a president. But at this point, how can this be avoided?

Mass shooter in an Alabama mall left a potential mistaken identity victim dead. Did I mention he was fresh out of bootcamp? Did I mention he was a classy and well respected citizen of his community? Whoops goes the police force. How are we going to explain this one away. Doesn’t seem likely that this one will easily be forgotten.

Episode #22

How was your turkey? Mine was succulent. The ham too. How was Kunta’s? Dry as the foot of a shoeless African. But the sides were good, right? Kunta explains how to ruin a Thanksgiving. I will tell you how to prepare my dessert. 

Sorry we missed you last week. Kunta was off completing the trifecta of the Spartan races and much to his surprise, I am impressed. There is a lot to be said of a person that willingly request punishment to that extent. Congrats on the completion, Kunta.

Our big issue on this epsiode is the caravan of immigrants that finally made it to the border. Surprise though, You can’t actually just cross into the US. Even if Democrats have made you believe that no one likes Trump…You can’t just openly disregard sovereignty. So now what? I don’t know. Go home? Tijuana ins’t going to accept you. Liberals will not save you. In fact, no one came to these people’s rescue. At one point, they were fired on. Tear gas on a crowd of people including women and children is not the media day you want as a president. But at this point, how can this be avoided?

Mass shooter in an Alabama mall left a potential mistaken identity victim dead. Did I mention he was fresh out of bootcamp? Did I mention he was a classy and well respected citizen of his community? Whoops goes the police force. How are we going to explain this one away. Doesn’t seem likely that this one will easily be forgotten.