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Raj Khedun is the inventor of the 3:3 insomnia hack.  I asked what his inspiration was to follow this path.  He tells the story of when he was three years old.  It was in a library.  Two books he picked guided him more than any other books. 

One book was about dinosaurs.  He explains about how he was fascinated with evolving.  The other about planets.  He was fascinated by the colours, and the fact that Mars is empty, while next to it earth is full of life.

School bored him, but fitness and sports kept him interested.  

Raj said everything was handed to him as a young man.  He describes himself as arrogant.  Until his mother took him to India.  His arrogance took a slap.  It was when he met an avatar.  He explains it's a power incarnated into a human.  He goes on to share that this avatar said he brought him to India and knew everything about him.  His message to Raj is "you need to be humble, you need to listen to the voice within."  A smashing of his ego put him in his place and he had to face that.

From 20 to 30 he went into "monk mode".  He thought about what one thing most people are missing is breath.  Breath is not air or oxygen, it is more;  light, electricity and magnetism.   

Listen to find out more about how your breath can help you...

You can reach Raj at https://33insomniahack.com/  

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How To Have Your Cake & Not Eat It All Too - A Guide To Adult Bulimia Recovery

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Welcome Caroline Kobylinsky, Trauma Therapist, and fluent in cussing, crying, and ice-coffee fueled break throughs.

Four years old and having an eating dismorphia?  As her "kiddo" this should never have been.

Caroline has been in recovery since 2020.  She has a very supportive husband, understanding that her marriage was in jeopardy because of her eating disorder.

Caroline was never happy with her body growing up and as she became in her 26 she became a Exercise Bulimic, which is what I did too.  In early 30's was when she really started purging.  

Purging is an endorphin, so after purging it made you feel you could take on the world.   She admits she didn't go to the doctor or dentist for years.  I can relate.  When I did go to my dentist I told them when they asked if I drank a lot of orange juice... yes.  I lied.

This is where Caroline admits we lie.   The insidious nature and power of our attachment to our eating disorder..

Withdrawal is a big part of an eating disorder, and so is the loss of friends.  I love what she says ... "how much space (the eating disorder) took up".  So true.

What is your hunger?  This podcast is such an open eyer!!  Caroline is honest and open.

And now recovered, she is out there helping.  We speak about having someone helping you who have been through it.  I agree.  Find someone who can associate with you.  If about nutrition, find a kind person.  Not a nice person, a kind person who will be honest with you.

How to let got of your best friend and not so much your best friend.  Bulimia is a liar.  Food isn't.

I love that she said that bulimia or any eating disorder is good, it serves a purpose.  I agree.  OCD, anxiety all are a part of this. 

This Podcast is so real.  Thank you Caroline!!  Love it. 

She recommends Life Without Ed.  I downloaded it as a Kindle.  Great book.  

I can't write enough about this episode.  I  connected so well and I know you will.

You can reach out to Caroline by going to:

 cwkcounseling.com or on Instagram @bruisedbananacounseling

"Listeners who resonate with my voice can quickly connect with me or learn about my approach to trauma-informed therapy." 

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Dr. Betsy is so special.  

Triple Board Certified Physician specializing in menopause and andropause.  I don't know why my typing adds a weird thing to the andro, but let's go with it..

I learned about stress, yeast, addictions, probiotics, from a very sweet and fun person.

She's so delightful and worth listening to.  

You can find her at www.pauseinstitute.com

It's about hearing her story - a great story.

Additionally here is a code for 10% off at the Pelvic Floor Store:  BLEEP  https://pelvicfloorstore.com/discount/BLEEP

Below are the links to find Dr. Betsy.  

Giveaways:

You will get a link to 10% off at the Pelvic Floor Store this will be sent to your email

Women’s Pelvic Meditation: https://femversity.com/pelvicmediation-sign-up

Hormone Quiz: https://link.apisystem.tech/widget/quiz/Xxe3hNPG5Iora9LqUILT

Websites:

The International Pause Institute:   https://pauseinstitute.com

The Pelvic Floor Store:   https://pelvicfloorstore.com

Affiliate Sign Up for the Pelvic Floor Store:   https://af.uppromote.com/the-pelvic-floor-store/register

Social Media Links

https://www.instagram.com/drbetsygreenleaf

https://www.instagram.com/drbetsygreenleafmenshealth

https://www.instagram.com/drbetsygreenleafspeaks

https://www.tiktok.com/@drbetsygreenleaf

https://www.tiktok.com/@drbetsygreenleafmen

https://www.facebook.com/dr.betsy.greenleaf/

https://www.instagram.com/internationalpauseinstitute

https://twitter.com/DrBGreenleaf

https://www.pinterest.com/drbetsygreenleaf

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdu6ZIxyAYGKsmJPtEvTS4w

https://www.linkedin.com/in/drbetsygreenleaf/

Music

Menopause Rock Album by Doc BET-Z

Menopause Memo https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/drbetsygreenleafbeats/menopause-memo

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Emma Lyons is a trauma informed healer and founder of the Trauma Matrix.

Emma was very depressed as a child, the invisible kind of depression that nobody really sees unless they really look.  All her life she thought she was the problem. She says she was brought up with this idea there's something wrong with her.

It wasn't until much later in life that she started looking at the family dynamic and started to recognize that her family is actually quite dysfunctional.

She says her mom ticks a lot of the boxes of a covert narcissist. Also her family is very emotionally repressed. As a child she had no one to talk to apart from Google and was very lonely and very isolated.

More recently she realized that dysfunctional and narcissistic families choose an individual, usually the most sensitive child, to be kind of the scapegoat. Emma explains you become "the landfill for all the unprocessed intergenerational trauma, shame, all kind of gets dumped on you and that can lead to a lot of internalized shame that's above and beyond what most people experience."

She believes this shame is one of the one of the core drivers of self-destructive behavior.

Emma feels that pretty much all the dysfunctions, including addictions, are because of this shame.  It's not like fear or anger because fear and anger are warning signs that something bad is could be around the corner.

What she realized is that shame is a function of empire and it's about controlling people.

"We're kind of gas lit in our society to believe that shame is somehow a good modifying behavior modifier. And it's absolutely not. When we shame people, people close in. They're less inclined to shame to change their behavior. So shame is actually does the opposite of actually changing. It makes people hide. It makes people less inclined to take responsibility."

The inner narcissist, she explains, ticks all the boxes of the narcissist, but the call is coming from inside the house.  Unlike a narcissist doing it to you,  it does it to yourself, coming from inside the body, inside your brain. "And so it's not manipulating other people necessarily, although it does use triangulation."

Emma helps people break up with shame. Her acronym is break. B R E A K.  Make sure to listen to find out what it stands for.


You can follow Emma on all social media by looking up trauma.matrix.  She is also on Substack as trauma matrix - traumamatrix.substack.com. 

She has a free gift for listeners. 

"If you're raising your hand and thinking, "Wow, I resonate with this. I do have a lot of shame and this is a good word for it." I have a free gift for you guys. It's called five signs it's time to break up with your inner narcissist. And it's like a it's you're going to see yourself in this if you go through it. Um It's about five classic signs that you need to break up with your inner narcissist that like now is the time you can't wait. And it also gives you some strategies and tools about how to really make that happen. So you can find that at tinyurl.nottotodaynarc."

Thank you for listening.

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"A lot of times CEOs will just let a person go and not really kind of think about it and just kind of see what happened.  I let them know what's the cost of really digging in to see if there was a problem because man, if you can help them figure out what that problem is, that loyalty and that brand recognition of you were there for them at their lowest really stands out. So, I'm really trying to change a lot of the culture and the way that uh people will think in that method, especially when it comes to turnover with employees."

"The crazy thing is you could actually quantify the cost is when they've gone through and done samples and studies on it, it's about two and a half to 2.8 times. So two and a half times that you're going through that cycle of a new employee. So if you have two employees leave, the average is you're going to go through five people to replace those two good employees. Think about all that time and that like training and all that you put into that. It's just not worth it when you can maybe coach up someone who's already there that you know has a history and a track record of performing for you and how we can get them back on track to where they were their best."


 "I highly suggest try this because it's it's really it's just brain science and neuroscience of how your brain works is pretty much on average the last 10 minutes before you go to sleep and then the first 10 minutes when you wake up your brain is still in a partial theta state which means you're highly suggestible your subconscious it's almost like you're talking to your subconscious and that is when you should be doing your affirmations talking about how you want your day to be. prime your brain of this is going to be a great day. I have so much energy. I've got this project or this presentation and I'm going to just like I this is how it's going to go. So in those 10 minutes before after you go to sleep, try to actively think of how that's going to go. How do you want it to go and like really like dig into the positives of that and I'm telling you what you will feel when you wake up the next morning." 

"Literally shame and humiliation are two of the lowest ranking range of emotions of it's the worst that you can feel about yourself.  So a great trick also that I can throw in is gratitude is the same part of the brain that processes the nasty emotions, anger, sadness, depression, frustration, fear, all those. And that part of the brain can only really those emotions at a time. So if you start feeling that overwhelm or the anxiety kick in or any of those things, and this is the big thing is be looking for it is once you feel that your stomach feeling that knot, kind of like you just almost have to stop and breathe for a second. As soon as you feel that try to again feel how grateful you are, like what's something you're grateful for whether it's your children, your parents, whatever it is for whoever what is something you can be truly grateful for." 

You can reach David at [email protected]. You can also look him up on Instagram - David McKee. And  anyone who's looking to get into this "mindset stuff" he has packages that start from one session up to however many you want to do. They do one at a time with

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Hilary Momberger Powers wants to send a message to this audience.  Recovered bulimic, but more so not leading with your wounds as a motivational speaker, life coach, and author.

Hilary's mother was an anorexic, alcoholic, and drop-dead good-looking, and a Jackie Gleason girl.

Now, with that being said, the daughter of the "Jackie Gleason Show" had to deal with this "having to give up her career for her children".

And that her mother told her that she would never be as beautiful as her?  How could you not feel not good enough?  

As the voice of Sally on Peanuts, she's living her trauma with the reptilian brain and has become a people pleaser.  From that, she became the bad girl.

What a compelling story!  

Some people think it is a good thing that parents want to get their children into show business with their connections.  Hilary says she loves her Mom, even after living in a foster home.  Listen to her words...

Beautiful and open woman with her story and I am honoured to have had her on my Podcast because I could relate in so many ways about the people pleasing, the lies and the power and the people pleasing.  

I didn't run away from home; my parents were not my reason. However, many stories on my Podcast, that's where it goes.  My issue was society, and back then our social media was not Instagram, or FB or... it was magazines... Cutouts on the fridge to be the Twiggy that her mother grew up with, that she has to reset what her mother couldn't.

Bulimiaisms.  Love that word.  That is something recovered bulimics need to be aware of.  What activates?  Old coping mechanism.  

Hilary, your story speaks volumes!  I loved relating to someone who knew at least some of what I went through, and you sharing your story!!  I feel you, and thank you.  I was honoured to have you on my Podcast.

And finally, I love that you spoke about your senses. Very interesting.

Hugs to you.  I aligned with you, and I hope my listeners do too.

Find Hilary at www.hilarypowers.com, and she is on IG and LinkedIn

And check out her new book Peanuts to Percoset.  

We have all had dark times.  I know for me as for Hilary, asking for help was the best solution.

If you are in a spot where you are feeling well, remember you can become the best version of yourself.

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Conscious Love.  What is it all about?

Christian grew up in Cuba and moved to the US, where he spent his time working on relationships and working with women's empowerment as well.

What was his calling for this?  He felt he had had that feeling since he was a child.  He wanted to be a priest at a young age.  

Shift in consciousness is how he sees his work.  

His empowerment of women?  "We have been going so off course".  When women are 50% in power, we will have a strategically different focus.

I ask about the overwhelm.  Trying to be in power while holding on to all the "motherhood" requirements is a huge responsibility.

Trying to take control can make you lose control.

Christian speaks of serving.  To neglect yourself is an act of arrogance.  He speaks it beautifully in being a tripod.  

The book.  Conscious Love.  We haven't been trained about relationships.  HOW TRUE.  I love what he said, that it was unfair to put your happiness into someone else's life.

Interesting view of his levels one, two, and three.  Listen to find out about that... but his number two is the juicy one. 

If someone is doing something that gets our goat, likely it is something we do ourselves.  I heard that so many times, and it's true.

About Karma... It's not.  Christian, I believe, knows that things happen, and if you want love, it will come to find you.  Most people have been hurt, and then we close our hearts.  He said we can't close it selectively.  This is where forgiveness is so important.  It's about taking ownership of all aspects of our lives.  I like the "tearing up the poor me card".  Beautifully said.

It begins with self-awareness.  Step one is to be most compatible with yourself.  

Interesting to think of making sure to see the blind spots.

Christian's books, Conscious Love, Transforming a Relationship to Relationships, and Awakening The Soul of Power, not about power, not pushing people down, are available on Amazon, your local bookstore, or reach out to Christian at soulfulpower.com.

Wonderful guest.  Thank you, Christian, for taking your time to share your story.

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What a wonderful time spent with Kerry.  Emotional and intriguing.  We shared our experiences.  I have to say, as a Podcast host, it's about my guest, and in this case, I felt such a connection that it was about "us".  "US" as a whole, who sometimes wonder if we had the wisdom when we were younger, if it would have made a difference.

I don't usually have one-hour Podcasts, and I was going to edit it to the usual 30 minutes, and I decided not to.  To just let you hear Kerry's story and mine too.  It was a very wonderful time speaking to so many aspects of life and healing.

You can find Kerry at kerryblaser.com on IG @kerryblaserofficial.

I had such a great time speaking with Kerry.  Wonderful lady and very insightful.

Mothers are the internal wound of an eating disorder? Listen to this to find out that that is not really the truth.

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This episode invites my special guest, Mallary Tenore Tarpley, who is a Journalism Professor at the University of Texas at Austin and Author of the memoir Slip: Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery.

Mallary became anorexic after the death of her mother when she was twelve shortly after her mother passed away from breast cancer.  She didn't know how to deal with her mother's passing.  She showed a strong front facade, however inside she felt her whole life was crumbling the longer she went on the further away she felt from her mom.  Somehow she felt that if she stayed the same size as when her mother left her she would be closer to her mother and small and safe.

This is a very interesting view of exactly what Mallary speaks to - Life in the middle of Eating Disorder Recovery.  I love how she speaks about changing a slip from a slide and building where there is a place where slips will follow, however recovery is possible but does not have to be perfect.

It is through treatment and her writing that Mallary found the origin of her eating disorder, what it served, and what to "recognize everything it could take away".

Mallary said it is really important to talk about recovery, even if not fully recovered.  She writes about what the middle place is like.  She explains that it is not a place of stagnancy, it is about recognizing the slips, and to move towards that recovery with being honest.  She speaks about immediacy, rather than delaying to remain as a slip instead of going into a slide. 

Mallory does have her husband and other people who she can rely on.  This is so important.

We also spoke to even after recovery, are there still signs that remain?  Do we still restrict even after recovery?  A lingering imprint, is what Mallary said, and I personally do not pay attention to it in general, however, I will say at odd times I do.

The book is out today on Amazon, and Barnes and Noble.  You can also reach Mallary at www.mallarytenoretarpley.com or on Amazon.com

Thank you, Mallary, for your insight.

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Very inspiring guest.  Dr. Sharnael was so humble and beautiful.  We connected to the point that we actually shared so many emotions of recovered adults with eating disorders.

This woman was one of the most heartfelt guests I have had in sharing about being in ministry, and I loved that we are all teachers, that there are no teachers.  I understood that.  We can learn from others, but it is about you being your own teacher to heal and take care of yourself.

Dr. Sharnael wants to do everything.  I can totally relate because I did until I found my peace.  I still want to do everything, but my peace side tells me to slow down.  :)

Her book, The Science of Miracles that speaks to the energy belt of a human.  I agree with this.  Bodies have two functions... what goes out and what comes in.  And it's about DNA, thoughts, words, feelings, and the heart is the biggest magnet.  What we think about, what we talk about, everything brings it into that field.

I asked if it was okay that I am okay that some people come into my field, and others I will move away from.  Dr. Sharnael explains this. Why I may have felt this.

Dolphins and animals like dogs have a huge field.  Some humans, however, can have inverted fields, and they take from someone else.  Even plants do this, and you can see it on camera!!

What a wonderful guest, speaking about being bulimic as well, and the signals that still come up after recovery.  

Absolutely worth a listen to if you are struggling with bulimia or an eating disorder, not just for her experience, but also for her big heart in wanting to make sure she can help others.

Beautiful guest.  We did cry together during this podcast, so make sure to pull out the tissues!

I highly recommend reaching out to Dr. Sharnael and you can find her at www.drsharnael.com, and you can also visit her Podcast at https://www.drsharnael.com/true-tv

Thank you, Dr. Sharnael, for being a heartwarming and heartfelt guest.

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