Bless Our Mess

What if your "midlife crisis" is actually an awakening? After 22 years of marriage and six kids, Taylor, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and Kelli open up about the sleepless nights, the burnout, and the quiet feeling that there has to be more to life than work, carpool, Netflix and bedtime.

They share why the people we love most often get the worst of us, how questioning the beliefs you grew up with can feel like grief, and why that season can be scary in a marriage. Then they walk through three simple steps to start living more intentionally with your spouse and kids, starting this week.

In this episode

• Midlife crisis vs. midlife awakening: why the behaviors look like a crisis, but what's underneath is a search for meaning
• Why our families get the worst of us: burnout, short fuses and the "well is dry" evenings
• The grief of growing: letting go of who you were in your 20s, and the upward turn on the other side
• When one spouse is changing: the fear of "what if they don't love this version of me?" and why reassurance matters
• 3 steps to start: a calendar audit, a non-negotiable couple and family hour, and one honest question: *are we living the life we actually want?*

Chapters

• 00:00 Cold open: sleepless nights and a sense of mortality
• 01:13 Welcome back
• 01:33 Is it really a midlife crisis?
• 02:59 "There has to be more than this"
• 05:20 Why the people we love get the worst of us
• 07:26 The homestead dream and the timing of change
• 13:07 Who is Kelli outside of being a mom?
• 21:01 Awakenings and the stages of grief
• 27:07 Vulnerability, shame and growth
• 31:08 Waking up from zombie mode
• 32:29 Advice if you're in it: don't be scared, give yourself grace
• 36:40 Step 1: Do a calendar audit
• 37:13 Step 2: Make a non-negotiable couple and family hour
• 38:56 Step 3: Ask "are we living the life we actually want?"
• 39:24 Coming up on Bless Our Mess

Try this: Look back at last week and count the hours you were truly present with your spouse and kids. Not to feel guilty, just to notice. We can't change what we don't acknowledge.

If this helped, send it to one person who needs it.

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Join us in this episode of Bless Our Mess as we delve into the crucial topic of dismissive parenting, drawing insights from the renowned research of Dr. John Gottman. Dismissive parenting can have profound effects on a child's emotional development, but fear not – we explore researched solutions based on Dr. Gottman's findings to help you stop dismissive parenting in its tracks. From prioritizing emotional connection and setting clear boundaries to offering positive reinforcement and spending quality time together, discover practical strategies to cultivate a nurturing and supportive environment for your child's emotional well-being. Tune in to learn how to nurture your child's emotional well-being and foster a strong and secure attachment that lasts a lifetime.

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In this episode of Bless Our Mess, we explore the fascinating world of dopamine – the neurotransmitter responsible for feelings of pleasure, motivation, and reward. Join us as we uncover five researched-based strategies to naturally boost dopamine levels and enhance your mental and emotional well-being. From regular exercise and engaging in creative activities to practicing mindfulness and prioritizing meaningful social connections, learn how simple lifestyle changes can have profound effects on your mood and overall happiness. Tune in to discover how to harness the power of dopamine to live a happier, more fulfilling life.

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In this insightful episode of Bless Our Mess, we delve into the unique challenges faced by parents raising children with ADHD and explore effective strategies for managing difficult behaviors. Join Taylor Jacobson a licensed marriage and family therapist dive into the invaluable guidance and support for navigating the complexities of parenting.

Discover practical tips for setting clear boundaries, establishing routines, and implementing positive reinforcement techniques to address challenging behaviors associated with ADHD. From hyperactivity and impulsivity to inattention and defiance, learn how to approach each behavior with empathy, understanding, and evidence-based interventions.

Through real-life anecdotes and expert insights, this episode offers a beacon of hope for parents grappling with the daily struggles of raising a child with ADHD. Gain a deeper understanding of your child's unique needs, strengths, and potential, and empower yourself with the tools needed to foster a supportive and nurturing environment at home.

Join us on Bless Our Mess as we explore the complexities of parenting ADHD children and provide practical strategies for promoting positive behavior, building resilience, and strengthening parent-child relationships. Whether you're a seasoned parent or new to the journey, this episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking guidance on parenting the difficult behaviors of ADHD children.

Don't miss out – subscribe now to Bless Our Mess and unlock expert insights to help you navigate the challenges of parenting with confidence and compassion.

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In this empowering episode of Bless Our Mess, delve into the psychology behind the timeless adage, "Bad Times Don't Last Forever," and uncover actionable strategies to cultivate resilience in the face of adversity. Host Taylor Jacobson a licensed marriage and family therapist, explore the inner workings of the human psyche during challenging times.

Discover the science-backed techniques and mindset shifts that enable individuals to navigate hardships with strength and grace. From reframing negative thoughts to fostering self-compassion, each strategy discussed serves as a beacon of hope for those traversing difficult terrain.

Tune in as we delve into real-life examples and anecdotes, illustrating the transformative power of resilience in overcoming life's toughest trials. Whether you're facing personal setbacks, professional challenges, or global crises, this episode equips you with the tools needed to weather the storm and emerge stronger than ever before.

Join us on Bless Our Mess as we unravel the psychology of resilience and embark on a journey toward resilience, growth, and triumph over adversity. Because indeed, "Bad Times Don't Last Forever" – and with the right mindset and strategies, you can emerge from the darkness into the light.

Don't miss out on this enlightening episode – subscribe now and unlock the secrets to building resilience in the face of life's greatest challenges.

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It's too easy for us as parents to see our child's behavior and attribute the behavior to their "nature", "just who they are," and "their temperament." In today's episode we discuss looking beyond the problematic behavior to assess if your child is suffering from some type of mental health issue.  We look at some scary stats about how more then 50% of children with mental health issues receive no treatment, how depression and suicide are on the rise, and how if these issues go untreated how it manifests itself in adulthood. 

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Nothing zaps our energy like negative toxic people.  If we are looking for more peace and happiness in life decreasing and cutting out negativity and toxicity out of our lives.  Today we discuss 9 strategies to deal with the negativity and toxicity some people bring into our lives.  

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Life can get very stressful and overwhelming.  High levels of stress are a breeding ground for negativity, decreased mental and emotional well-being, and is a major contributor to the decline of our physical health.  Today we talk about simple, straight forward approaches to beating stress and staying calm.

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Today we discuss the most addictive social media features and how it feeds addiction, ruins our mental and emotional health, and the damaging effects on our children. 

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Sometimes we engage in certain habits that keep us from the levels of happiness we want.  In today's episode we will dive into what science has found to increase our happiness.

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